A CLEAN MERMAID SONG

A CLEAN (MERMAID) SONG

There was a young sailor
who looked through the glass,
and spied a fair mermaid
with scales on her...

...island where seagulls
fly over their nests:
she combed the long hair
that hung over her... 

...shoulders and caused her
to tickle and itch.
The lookout cried out:
"There's a beautiful..."

"...mermaid a-sitting
out there on the rocks!"
The crew came around
a-grabbing their... 

...glasses and crowded
four deep to the rail,
all eager to share
in this fine piece of...

...news which the captain
soon heard from the watch.
He tied down the wheel
and he reached for his cr-...

...crackers and cheese which
he kept near the door,
in case he might someday
encounter a...

...mermaid; he knew he must
use all his wits:
cried "Throw out a line!
We'll lasso her..."

"...flippers, and then 
we will certainly find
if mermaids are better
before or be..."

...brave, my good fellows!"
The captain then said.
"With fortune we'll break
through her mermaiden head-

-ing to starboard!"
They tacked with dispatch.
and caught that fair mermaid
just under her...

...elbows and hustled her
down below decks,
and each took a turn
at her feminine se-...

...setting her free 
at the end of the farce;
she splashed in the waves,
falling flat on her a-...

After a while, one man
noticed some scabs,
and soon they broke out with the pox
and the...

scratching with fury,
cursing with spleen...
This song may be dull,
but it's certainly clean!