martes, 6 de enero de 2015

DRAGON STUDYING DAY

DRAGON STUDYING DAY

Original song: Dragostea din tei (Love Beneath the Linden), O-Zone
Misheard lyrics, by Alexandra Margraviati... Primus Iunii MMXV


My, a he
my, a Who
my, a car
my, a... ha-ha!

My, a he
my, a Who
my, a car
my, a... ha-ha!

My, a he
my, a Who
my, a car
my, a... ha-ha!

My, a he
my, a Who
my, a car
my, a... ha-ha!

Alone, salute, sit there... ooh, hi Duke!
See the rug? You be the man! Please mash the very Uchihas.

'Allo, 'Allo! Sit there, Picasso!
Damn that beep!
(beep beep, beep beep)
She's all unique:
Dark side, Steno, Cher, NIMIC.

Praise the pleasure, Numa, Numa, yay!
Numa, Numa, yay! Numa, Numa, Numa, yay!
Keep it down, Sir! Dragon studying day!
Me, I'm impressed, you OK pay!

"Too soon", said Spoon.
"Just eat... a comb!"
Alone, you'll be the man! Sit there, very Uchiha.

'Allo, 'Allo! Saint Arashi... Picasso!
Damn that beep!
She's all unique:
Dark sideStenoCherNIMIC.

Praise the pleasure, Numa, Numa, yay!
Numa, Numa, yay! Numa, Numa, Numa, yay!
Keep it down, Sir! Dragon studying day!
Me, I'm impressed, you OK pay!
Praise the pleasure, Numa, Numa, yay!
Numa, Numa, yay! Numa, Numa, Numa, yay!
Keep it down, Sir! Dragon studying day!
Me, I'm impressed, you OK pay!

My, a he
my, a Who
my, a car
my, a... ha-ha!

My, a he
my, a Who
my, a car
my, a... ha-ha!

My, a he
my, a Who
my, a car
my, a... ha-ha!

My, a he
my, a Who
my, a car
my, a... ha-ha!

Praise the pleasure, Numa, Numa, yay!
Numa, Numa, yay! Numa, Numa, Numa, yay!
Keep it down, Sir! Dragon studying day!
Me, I'm impressed, you OK pay!
Praise the pleasure, Numa, Numa, yay!
Numa, Numa, yay! Numa, Numa, Numa, yay!
Keep it down, Sir! Dragon studying day!
Me, I'm impressed, you OK pay!



OH, FOUR TUNA

OH, FOUR TUNA
MISHEARD LYRICS

Original Lyrics: Vox Pop (Goliard folksong)
Music: Carl Orff
Misheard Lyrics: Alexandra H. Margraviati - VI Iunii MMXV

Oh, four tuna!
Bring more, Luna!
Statuary on her knees!

Some men grate cheese,
hot temperate cheese,
Vimto can taste of kidneys...

You caught two rats,
bet too cool rats,
you don't get cheese or chicken...

Ate chips all day,
hot and salty,
dipped sore feet, good hot chili...

Saucy codpiece...
Get me cod, please!
Brought up to volume in me!

Suck juice from moose!
Finance some moose! (Alt.: Fun with some moose!)
Second these so rude big knees!

Open bra top!
Get 'em loved up!
Leaky foot when near cherries!

Look there, Lovegoods!
Don't sue YouTube!
Farewell to missionaries...

SAW SOME WOOKIEES!
GREAT BIG WOOKIEES!
THEY GIVE YOU GONORRHEA!

THIS FAT BIG PUSS!
LET'S GIVE HIM BOOTS!
SEND HIM TO NORTH KOREA!

LOVELY YODA,
SEND ME MORE OF
POTATO SOUP AND CHICKEN!

HOT MESS ALL DAY!
SING IT UGLY!
BE GOOD FOOOOOOOOR, PLEASE, LOOOVELY CAAAAKE!!

(EPIC CODA)

THE SNOW QUEEN IV: ROMANIAN TRANSLATION

A patra povestire

domingo, 4 de enero de 2015

MACROCEPHALY (AND A RED WEDDING)

Macrocephaly (from the Greek word for "large-headedness") is, in the military, when an army has got many more officers than privates.
This condition affected, for instance, the Spanish Army of the Belle Époque (turn of the 19th-20th century).

The following excerpt from the chivalric romance Generides does not only describe the conditions which precede military macrocephaly, but also an event not strangely similar to the Red Wedding in Westeros (which takes cues from the Black Dinner, the Toledo Night, the Massacre of Stockholm, and the fate of the last Romanovs among other historical events):

The soldiers had been 
won by promises to be made all officers and to 
have their pay doubled ; and the nobles had all 
been secured, for they had been locked up in a 
castle, and Ameloc had cut off the heads of such 
as would not take the oath of allegiance to 
him. 


To be made all officers? Does this Ameloc guy know which consequences this might have on a real-life army?


The nobles locked up in a castle? And the ones who would not pledge allegiance to the usurper had their heads cut off? This just screams of RED WEDDING.

viernes, 2 de enero de 2015

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, HER ROYAL MAJESTY



LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, 
HER ROYAL MAJESTY 
Lizzie Hearts 
Crown Princess and future Queen of Wonderland,
has finally made an entrance in shops worldwide!

So roll out the red carpet,
sharpen your Riddlish, 
bend the knee and drop the hat!


Eyes, lips, hearts, make-up
Frills, lace, gems, handbags

Shine, heels, legs, entrance...




Lizzie Hearts

Website - Lizzie Hearts card
  • Parent: The Queen of Hearts
  • Parent's Story: Alice in Wonderland
  • Roommate: Duchess Swan (canon) / Kitty Cheshire and Sophia von Lilienstiel (fanon)
  • Secret Heart's Desire: I'm proud of my heritage, though I do wish to be a kinder Queen of Hearts. All that shouting hurts my throat.
  • My "Magic" Touch: With a flick of the wrist, I build anything you can imagine out of cards.
  • Storybook Romance Status: I'll wait until I get back to Wonderland to think about that.
  • "Oh Curses!" Moment: People take me way too literally. When I yell, "OFF WITH YOUR HEAD," that's just my Wonderland way of saying "Please" and "Thank you."
  • Favorite Subject: Grimmnastics. I royally heart croquet. They've even made me captain of the team!
  • Least Favorite Subject: General Villainy. Why does everyone think I'm a villain? My destiny is to be a riddle!
  • Best Friends Forever After: Kitty Cheshire and Madeline Hatter are the only ones who understand me. Literally.




jueves, 1 de enero de 2015

HAPPY NEW YEAR 2015

It's been another year full of excitement, dear readers, for me and for all of you.

May 2015 be as good or even better than the Year of the Whores... I mean, of the Horse.

So, WELCOME TO THE YEAR OF THE CHEAP... I mean, of the SHEEP!

HAPPY 2015










IF A VICAR LIKE THAT GAVE THE SERVICE, I WOULD GLADLY GO TO CHURCH


Ce qui, dans le jeune homme, eût, au premier abord, frappé l’observateur, c’est que cette gravité, qui était profonde dans son regard, et qui résultait évidemment de son esprit, ne résultait pas de sa personne. La gravité admet la passion, et l’exalte en l’épurant, mais ce jeune homme était, avant tout, joli. 
Étant prêtre, il avait au moins vingt-cinq ans ; il en paraissait dix-huit. Il offrait cette harmonie, et aussi ce contraste, qu'en lui l'âme semblait faite pour la passion et le corps pour l'amour. Il était blond, rose, frais, très fin et très souple dans son costume sévère, avec des joues de jeune fille et des mains délicates ; il avait une allure vive et naturelle, quoique réprimée. Tout en lui était charme, élégance, et presque volupté. La beauté de son regard corrigeait cet excès de grâce. Son sourire sincère, qui montrait des dents d'enfant, était pensif et religieux. C'était la gentillesse d'un page et la dignité d'un évêque. 
Sous ses épais cheveux blonds, si dorés qu'ils paraissaient coquets, son crâne était élevé, candide et bien fait. On sentait, en le voyant, un de ces êtres bienveillants, innocents et purs, qui progressent en sens inverse de l'humanité vulgaire, qui l'illusion fait sages et que l'expérience fait enthousiastes. Sa jeunesse transparente laissait voir la maturité intérieure.

Voilà le révérend Ebenezer Caudray, le nouveau recteur de Guernesey.

VICTOR HUGO