- Fool the Heavens to Cross the Ocean: the more obvious something seems, the more secrets it can conceal, and people pay more attention to the unusual; thus, mask your real goals by using the excuse of a fake goal; when the enemy has taken this pretense for granted and lowered their guard, strike showing your true colours (the open feint: point west/left in public when your real goal, in pectore, is to the east/right. Also "crying wolf" to lull the enemy into taking for granted that it's still a hoax the time you finally strike, like Hitler threatened the UK and France time after time right before the unexpected, not-taken-seriously real invasion).
- Besiege One State to Rescue Another: To defend against attack by limbs, strike straight for the heart, the throat, or the solar plexus (this is a metaphor); find out and attack your enemy's weak points. (Like the previous one... this one is easy. Iago, or Baelish, always finding and hitting the soft spots of others, may be a perfect example. In warfare, taking a keystone fortress or a ford/pass, or taking advantage of the enemy's flaws -Gustavus Adolphus against the tercios- may be the perfect example)
- Kill with a Borrowed Sword: have others -third parties- do your dirty work to keep your own hands clean; also use the resources of said third parties in your own benefit (Thus did Tywin employ the Freys as "borrowed swords" at the Red Wedding).
- Wait at Leisure while the Enemy Toils / is Exhausted: war of attrition; encourage the enemy to burn up their strength in futile quests, starve, thirst, freeze... while your own troops keep their health and strength intact. Then strike when the enemy is exhausted and losing all their morale! Fabian tactics, avoiding open battle until the enemy is exhausted. (Scorched earth tactics: the reason why never to get involved in a land war in Russia -or Dorne-. Wallenstein did the same to the Swedes at the Old Keep in the summer of 1632)
- Loot a House on Fire at Your Ease: take advantage of internal dissension between factions on the enemy side, of epidemics, revolutions... attack the enemy right when it's weakened the most by crisis/force majeure (the great powers -mainly France and Sweden- taking advantage of the squabble between the Kaiser and electors, and between some electors and others, during the 30 Years' War; Franco similarly defeating the Second Spanish Republic torn from within by schism; the kingdoms around France declaring war on the newborn republic during the Revolution; or Tywin Lannister in the War of Five Kings).
- Make a Noise in the East, but Strike in the West: the surprise factor. Confuse the enemy with a feint, then strike them down when and where they least expect it (the Wronsky feint, in quidditch, when a seeker makes it look like he's diving for the snitch...).
- Create Something Out of the Blue: Make them believe there is something when in fact there is nothing (the Swedish scarecrow sentinels on the walls of Poltava). Or that there is nothing when in fact there is something. Or spread rumours until they snowball and, just like in the telephone game, they are taken for granted. Use an illusion (again, Iago is a master of this, for instance in making Cassio appear as the instigator of the brawl, and then as Desdemona's lover).
- Openly Repair the High Road, but Sneak Through the Secret Passage: deceive the enemy with a very obvious and predictable approach that will take a very long time (making them concentrate on the decoy and lower their guard), then surprise them by taking an unexpected shortcut and a lightning sneak attack. This is an extension of "Noise in the East, but Strike in the West," but using easy-to-see and suspicion-evading physical decoys (a Wronski-feinting seeker, carrying out the feint in broad sunlight, may have a co-conspirator in the nearby audience using a hand mirror or other snitch-looking shining object as the decoy snitch... does that abide by the rules?).
- Watch the Fires Burn Across the River / Watch the Tigers Fight One Another: Wait at the edge of the battlefield. Delay entering the field of battle until all the other players are exhausted by fighting. Then, storm in at full strength and pick up the pieces, curbstomping them (the dissensions in between the factions of the wavering Second Republic, between those in favour of surrender and those against it, made Franco await the result of the internal schism until he finally attacked).
- Hide a Knife Behind a Friendly Smile: gain the trust, and maybe even the love, of your enemy, with courteous words and manners -or whatever the victim appreciates in a person-. Again, Iago may be the textbook example in literature, and Wallenstein in real-life history (Hans in Frozen, Petyr Baelish, Sosuke Aizen... follow in Iago's trail).
- Sacrifice the Plum to Spare the Peach: sacrifice short-term goals in favour of long-term goals. Scapegoating, including the Caiaphas principle (Caiaphas principle: to sacrifice the individual to save the community; for example, Jaime Lannister slitting Aerys's throat to save King's Landing); another example would be sacrificing a forlorn hope used as decoy in order to attain victory, or to save as many resources as possible during retreat.
- Take Every Chance to Pilfer a Sheep: take every opportunity that presents itself, no matter how small it may be, and avail yourself of any profit, no matter how slight. After all, a sheep is not a cow, yet it may still do as resources. Every mistake the enemy makes must be taken advantage of (Iago taking advantage of the unexpected victory and the celebration thereof -not to mention the faux-pas his victims make-, Wallenstein of the fact that the Swedes will reach Saxony in November...).
- Stomp the Grass to Scare the Snakes: do something spectacular to provoke an enemy response, to arouse the enemy's suspicions and disrupt their thinking (Wallenstein burning the Old Keep and marching into Saxony to make Gustavus Adolphus react). Also, if stealth is required: Do Not Stomp the Grass to Scare the Snakes: an imprudent act will give your position/intention away to the enemy.
- Borrow a Corpse to Resurrect the Soul: "resurrect" a technology, a method, an ideology... that has become discarded for being "old-fashioned," reinterpreting said resurrected artifact for your own purposes (the Nazis appropriating the swastika -originally a Sanskrit lucky charm- and some Norse myths, aside from racial biology, to create their lore of the Aryan race).
- Lure the Tiger Off its Den: lure the opponent away from their position, separating them from their source of strength; one can also lure the tiger into one's own turf (the scorched earth tactics mentioned before also take advantage of the unfamiliar extreme climate -whether of Russia or Dorne-, for which the enemy is not prepared).
- Let Loose in Order to Capture: to avoid bloodshed, "al enemigo que huye puente de plata"; since a cornered victim will make a desperate strike to win or die, leave the one you have cornered a tiny shred of hope to escape, a hope spot which is actually a ruse. When the "hope" of freedom is proven a falsehood that had hitherto been taken for granted, the broken enemy will surrender without a fight.
- Toss Out a Brick to Get Jade: bait the enemy; make them believe they gain something, or just make them react to them, and actually gain something more valuable (like information) in exchange. (This was the scheme Bellatrix Lestrange used on the leading cast in The Order of the Phoenix, that led to the demise of Sirius Black -the "brick" bait being the prophecy about the chosen one-). The Trojan Horse ruse also fits this kind of strategy.
- Defeat the Enemy by Taking the Leader: go straight for the leader, for his demise may throw the whole enemy host into demoralisation. This only works if the men do not love the leader, who holds the disorganised group together as a keystone, controlling them by fear (torture, punishments) or by offering them rewards (soldiers of fortune). If the followers truly love and respect the leader, however, they will retaliate (as Wallenstein found out at Lützen!).
- Steal the Firewood From Under the Pot: deny your enemy the resources needed to oppose you, sapping their strength to weaken their morale (another staple of scorched-earth tactics, seen in the Russian -burning the crops- as well as Dornish/Wallenstein cases -poisoning the springs-; attacking supply lines and caravans of provisions/ammunition is another example). It can also be a human resource -an advisor, a pathfinder...- This works best when the enemy is already wavering, to weaken them even further.
- Trouble the Waters to Catch Fish: use confusion to further your own goals. When the enemy is dealing with uncertainty, create more chaos to confuse the enemy even more, using stealth and/or distraction to strike them with their guard down. It's more or less like Looting a House on Fire, only that you have fanned the flames into conflagration in the first place (in the former strategy, the "fire" is completely force majeure and internal schisms). Thus, Richelieu and Wallenstein employed intrigue to develop the schisms within the Habsburg Empire -between the Kaiser and the electors, between the Catholic electors and the Society of Jesus, between Catholic and Protestant electors...- The Cardinal even took advantage of Wallenstein's asking the Crown and the Church for a share of the "Edict of Restitution cake" to orchestrate the cashiering of the Duke of Friedland from his position as the Kaiser's first sword.
- Shed the Cicada's Golden Shell: disguise as someone/something inconspicuous or masquerade as someone/something else (false flag ruses, such as Gustavus III's Swedish "Cossacks" or Hitler's Operation Himmler to justify invasion of Poland; also the age-old trope of Dressing as the Enemy to infiltrate or escape them -whether Winkies, Stormtroopers, or whatever; it's been also used in real life, by Cervantes breaking Moorish prison dressed as a janissary!-).
- Lock the Door to Catch the Thief: let the enemy ensnare themselves, let them get hoist by their own petards. Tempt them into situations that lead to a flight forwards, and then cut off their supply lines. Once the prey is trapped, lock the door for good. Set a trap and make it click completely when the enemy has fallen hook, line, and sinker (again, Wallenstein marching into Saxony to attract Gustavus Adolphus, for the latter to give battle in November).
- Befriend Someone Far and Attack Someone Near: distant allies make good allies for it is unwise for one to invade them, while the easiest lands to attack are those closest to one's own (in the Holy Land, Israel was and is allied with Western powers -the US, the UK, and so forth- while waging war against the Palestine territories).
- Obtain a Common Enemy: if you have two of your enemies at each others' throats, ally with one of them and borrow the resources of that ally to attack the common enemy, promising them that they'll be rewarded once they've defeated the third party; then, once said common enemy is defeated, use those resources to turn against your temporary ally (Wallenstein surely had this in mind for Sweden, hoping to ally with Gustavus Adolphus against the Kaiser!).
- Replace the Pillars with Rotten Timbers: Damage the sustaining structures, physical or ideological, on which the enemy depends, and replace them with systems which you control; making them dependent on you, discrediting their allies/friends/advisors and/or gaining monopoly of their resources... This can only work if you have got their trust. (Again, Iago is a master at this, and so is Baelish. Also, in 1631, the Catholic League relied completely on the granaries of Friedland, leading to a debt with Wallenstein that had to be paid... hence the taking of Magdeburg and Leipzig... which led to the League's defeat at Breitenfeld).
- Point at One to Curse Another: use indirect means of getting your way; use third parties as intermediaries; threaten or punish -physically or emotionally- the weak to keep the strong in awe of you; make an example of those who oppose you by using disproportionate punishment (many cases of scapegoats who had to "drink the hemlock" for their executioners to frighten others into submission, such as Hans Hermann von Katte -beheaded by the Sergeant King of Prussia to shock his son Frederick- or Elia Martell and her children -gruesomely killed on the orders of Tywin Lannister-. Also the Aragonian king Ramiro the Monk and his notorious "bell of Huesca," beheading twelve feudal lords; Charles IX of Sweden also executed the most notorious of his brother John III's partisan lords to keep himself on the throne he had usurped).
- Wear the Mask of a Fool While Remaining Smart: for who believes the fool, who is never taken seriously? It's the least suspicious person! Pretend you are stupid, or insane, or intoxicated, or physically weak, or not left- or right-handed (as Íñigo Montoya does), but keep your wits about you. Then strike when they least expect it, showing your true wit or strength when it's time to attack! There must be method in the madness (The most vivid example I can come up with is Hamlet feigning insanity during his revenge on a usurper stepfather; "method in the madness" indeed. Tyrion Lannister is also a master at wearing, in his case, the mask of a lush as well as that of a fool. Likewise, Gretel plays stupid to lure the wicked witch into the oven. Used when it applies to physical strength/skill, I would go for Íñigo Montoya switching sword hand and revealing that he is not left-handed! Ryoma, in The Prince of Tennis, usually plays right-handed, but switches racket hand -he's a born lefty- when the going gets tough!).
- Lure Them Onto the Roof, Then Pull the Ladder Away: ensure there is no going back; employ ruse to lure the enemy into dangerous terrain, then, having cornered them completely, cut off their route of escape, communication, and resources; rendering the enemy isolated, unable to retreat, and bereft of supplies... (Again, scorched earth tactics... trying to get involved in a land war in Russia or Dorne... but also, to coax one's own allies to follow one, the burning of bridges after crossing streams and the burning of ships after having landed ashore to ensure that there's no turning back and that the dice are cast -"quemar las naves", as both Hernán Cortés and Nymeria did upon landing-).
- Deck the Trees with Artificial Blossoms: appear powerful when you have far less power. Make it appear that you have more resources to keep a stronger enemy at bay (Tordenskiöld's soldiers marching around Carlsten Fortress, ostensibly 20000 strong but actually 500 strong; the Swedish scarecrow "guards" on the walls of Poltava. Another example would be the gruffalo story, in which the mouse and the gruffalo travel together through the woods, the gruffalo frightens the predators, but does not realise he is the dreaded one, and believes that the mouse is the one the predators fear, as the mouse herself had told the gruffalo beforehand when the two of them met), or appear weaker and lacking more resources to dissuade the enemy. Make a trifle appear valuable / something worthless appear useful by the use of ruse.
- Exchange the Roles of Host and Guest: usurp leadership in a scenario in which you would be subordinate; create dependency, reversing the roles so that the more powerful opponent finds themselves in a subordinate position. Pretend to be the guest to be accepted, but develop and become the owner from within (Here, the Duke of Friedland and Iago give some textbook examples: Wallenstein offering the Count of Tilly Friedland grain to create a debt that Tilly would have to pay, to weaken the Catholic League -as said in Replace the Beams with Rotten Timbers- / Wallenstein offering the Kaiser the money and the provisions to raise "the Empire's own" army; Iago convinces all of his victims, who outrank him, that he is the perfect confidant, then -thanks to their trust- has them over a barrel. In Judges 4, Yael welcomes a fleeing, vanquished General Sisera and caters to his every need -exhaustion, thirst, concealment from the enemy-, then, when he has let his guard down the most, she literally hammers home a point!).
- Honey Trap: send the enemy irresistible pleasures of the flesh, such as offerings of money, wenches, or drugs (strong drink, opium...) as a gift with pretenses of peace, to distract them and sow confusion among them. The leader and/or the officers, having given in, will neglect their duties and lower their guard; also, suspicious individuals on the enemy side will find themselves at odds with those who have given in to the honey trap, creating internal dissension and even intrigues (This is, in a nutshell, Queen Medb's MO in the Táin: more specifically, she uses the promise of her daughter's hand, mead, and bards to lure new allies. In the Old Testament, Yael's killing of Sisera and Judith's of Holofernes may also count in. In the Gesta Romanorum story 88 this is combined with the Empty Fort when an outnumbered general feigns surrender, retreats, and resigns his castle or campsite, with all the provisions therein, into the hands of the outnumbering enemy: "Now the castles -or campsites- were furnished with casks of wine empoisoned with the seed of a certain herb; insomuch, that whosoever drank of it immediately fell asleep. He knew that his opponents were starved; and that, overjoyed to find such excellent quarters, they would drink to excess, and fall into the half death-like quiet of sleep. They did so, and the general, returning, put them all to death.").
- Fling Open the Gates to the Empty Fort: when you are vulnerable, make the enemies think twice about attacking you; double bluff the enemies by pretending weakness, as if to entice them to attack. Appear ready to fight, but make the enemy suspect there is a ruse when in fact there is none. When the enemy is superior in numbers and your situation is such that you expect to be overrun at any moment, then drop all pretense of military preparedness, act calmly and taunt the enemy, so that the enemy will think you have a huge ambush hidden for them. It works best by acting calm and at ease when your enemy expects you to be tense. This ploy is only successful if in most cases you do have a powerful hidden force and only sparsely use the empty fort strategy. (The ruse at the storming of the Marienberg Fortress, ostensibly garrisoned by unarmed Jesuits, which Gustavus Adolphus, however, quickly saw through; Tywin Lannister opening the gates of King's Landing to the rebels, ditto Vibhishana in Sri Lanka - In the Gesta Romanorum story 88, this is combined with the Honey Trap when an outnumbered general feigns surrender, retreats, and resigns his castle or campsites, with all the provisions therein, into the hands of the outnumbering enemy: "Now the castles -or campsites- were furnished with casks of wine empoisoned with the seed of a certain herb; insomuch, that whosoever drank of it immediately fell asleep. He knew that his opponents were starved; and that, overjoyed to find such excellent quarters, they would drink to excess, and fall into the half death-like quiet of sleep. They did so, and the general, returning, put them all to death.").
- Use the Enemy's Own Spies to Sow Dissension: recruit moles, or double agents, or fifth columnists, or turncoat informers (Judas Iscariot); and employ them to "sow weeds among the wheat." When preoccupied with settling internal disputes, the enemy's ability to confront external threats is compromised. Then, after the stratagems have been successfully carried out, reward these expendable moles as a traitor deserves.
- Injure Yourself to Gain the Enemy's Trust: the Wounded Gazelle Gambit. Win their trust through sympathy, pretending you have been hurt. A variant is to take extreme risks (ie "suicide" risks) to prove yourself to them. On one hand, the enemy is lulled into lowering their guard, since you are not being regarded as an immediate threat. The second application is a way of ingratiating yourself with your enemy by pretending the injury was caused by a mutual enemy (like the stepsisters do in Disney's Cinderella, by accusing her of stealing their accessories; or the twin cats incriminate Lady in front of Aunt Sarah, by making her appear as the real culprit. Iago also employs the Wounded Gazelle Gambit, being injured as he tried to restrain a drunken Cassio, by making it appear that he was overly concerned about the lieutenant's alleged addiction).
- Chain Multiple Stratagems: pile up two or more of these strategies which have been explained before, either as a cause-and-effect chain or having Plan A, Plan B, Plan C, and so forth as backup (Iago, Wallenstein, and Baelish have made such chains of stratagems).
- If Everything Else Fails, Retreat. Nothing more remains to explain than the same axiom in Swedish: "Bättre fly än illa fäkta" (Better to Flee than Sadly Fighting Be). Sounds even better than "better safe than sorry" or the "Joestar signature tactic," right? Retreating, unlike surrendering, is temporary -you'll lose the battle, but still be able to win the war-; and everyone learns more from their mistakes.
Mostrando entradas con la etiqueta petyr baelish. Mostrar todas las entradas
Mostrando entradas con la etiqueta petyr baelish. Mostrar todas las entradas
viernes, 11 de enero de 2019
THE 36 STRATEGIES / STRATAGEMS
Ruses de guerre, gambits, schemes... Anonymous Asian lore from the Warring States era (Sengoku jidai, Zhànguó shídài) gathers thirty-six stratagems that would be great for intrigue and/or military fiction as well as for real life (for instance, entrepreneurship). No matter whether you are an Iago or a Tywin Lannister, make sure that you --as a schemer-- keep them all close to yourself.
lunes, 9 de octubre de 2017
THE 36 STRATEGIES / STRATAGEMS
Ruses de guerre, gambits, schemes... Anonymous Asian lore from the Warring States era (Sengoku jidai, Zhànguó shídài) gathers thirty-six stratagems that would be great for intrigue and/or military fiction as well as for real life (for instance, entrepreneurship). No matter whether you are an Iago or a Tywin Lannister, make sure that you --as a schemer-- keep them all close to yourself.
- Fool the Heavens to Cross the Ocean: the more obvious something seems, the more secrets it can conceal, and people pay more attention to the unusual; thus, mask your real goals by using the excuse of a fake goal; when the enemy has taken this pretense for granted and lowered their guard, strike showing your true colours (the open feint: point west/left in public when your real goal, in pectore, is to the east/right. Also "crying wolf" to lull the enemy into taking for granted that it's still a hoax the time you finally strike, like Hitler threatened the UK and France time after time right before the unexpected, not-taken-seriously real invasion).
- Besiege One State to Rescue Another: To defend against attack by limbs, strike straight for the heart, the throat, or the solar plexus (this is a metaphor); find out and attack your enemy's weak points. (Like the previous one... this one is easy. Iago, or Baelish, always finding and hitting the soft spots of others, may be a perfect example. In warfare, taking a keystone fortress or a ford/pass, or taking advantage of the enemy's flaws -Gustavus Adolphus against the tercios- may be the perfect example)
- Kill with a Borrowed Sword: have others -third parties- do your dirty work to keep your own hands clean; also use the resources of said third parties in your own benefit (Thus did Tywin employ the Freys as "borrowed swords" at the Red Wedding).
- Wait at Leisure while the Enemy Toils / is Exhausted: war of attrition; encourage the enemy to burn up their strength in futile quests, starve, thirst, freeze... while your own troops keep their health and strength intact. Then strike when the enemy is exhausted and losing all their morale! Fabian tactics, avoiding open battle until the enemy is exhausted. (Scorched earth tactics: the reason why never to wage a land war in Russia -or Dorne-. Wallenstein did the same to the Swedes at the Old Keep in the summer of 1632)
- Loot a House on Fire at Your Ease: take advantage of internal dissension between factions on the enemy side, of epidemics, revolutions... attack the enemy right when it's weakened the most by crisis/force majeure (the great powers taking advantage of the squabble between the Kaiser and electors, and between some electors and others, during the 30 Years' War; Franco similarly defeating the Second Spanish Republic torn from within by schism; the kingdoms around France declaring war on the newborn republic during the Revolution; or Tywin Lannister in the War of Five Kings).
- Make a Noise in the East, but Strike in the West: the surprise factor. Confuse the enemy with a feint, then strike them down when and where they least expect it (the Wronsky feint, in quidditch, when a seeker makes it look like he's diving for the snitch...).
- Create Something Out of the Blue: Make them believe there is something when in fact there is nothing (the Swedish scarecrow sentinels on the walls of Poltava). Or that there is nothing when in fact there is something. Or spread rumours until they snowball and, just like in the telephone game, they are taken for granted. Use an illusion (again, Iago is a master of this, for instance in making Cassio appear as the instigator of the brawl, and then as Desdemona's lover).
- Openly Repair the High Road, but Sneak Through the Secret Passage: deceive the enemy with a very obvious and predictable approach that will take a very long time (making them concentrate on the decoy and lower their guard), then surprise them by taking an unexpected shortcut and a lightning sneak attack. This is an extension of "Noise in the East, but Strike in the West," but using easy-to-see and suspicion-evading physical decoys (a Wronski-feinting seeker, carrying out the feint in broad sunlight, may have a co-conspirator in the nearby audience using a hand mirror or other snitch-looking shining object as the decoy snitch... does that abide by the rules?).
- Watch the Fires Burn Across the River / Watch the Tigers Fight One Another: Wait at the edge of the battlefield. Delay entering the field of battle until all the other players are exhausted by fighting. Then, storm in at full strength and pick up the pieces, curbstomping them (the dissensions in between the factions of the wavering Second Republic, between those in favour of surrender and those against it, made Franco await the result of the internal schism until he finally attacked).
- Hide a Knife Behind a Friendly Smile: gain the trust, and maybe even the love, of your enemy, with courteous words and manners -or whatever the victim appreciates in a person-. Again, Iago may be the textbook example in literature, and Wallenstein in real-life history (Hans in Frozen, Petyr Baelish, Sosuke Aizen... follow in Iago's trail).
- Sacrifice the Plum to Spare the Peach: sacrifice short-term goals in favour of long-term goals. Scapegoating, including the Caiaphas principle (Caiaphas principle: to sacrifice the individual to save the community; for example, Jaime Lannister slitting Aerys's throat to save King's Landing); another example would be sacrificing a forlorn hope used as decoy in order to attain victory, or to save as many resources as possible during retreat.
- Take Every Chance to Pilfer a Sheep: take every opportunity that presents itself, no matter how small it may be, and avail yourself of any profit, no matter how slight. After all, a sheep is not a cow, yet it may still do as resources. Every mistake the enemy makes must be taken advantage of (Iago taking advantage of the unexpected victory and the celebration thereof -not to mention the faux-pas his victims make-, Wallenstein of the fact that the Swedes will reach Saxony in November...).
- Stomp the Grass to Scare the Snakes: do something spectacular to provoke an enemy response, to arouse the enemy's suspicions and disrupt their thinking (Wallenstein burning the Old Keep and marching into Saxony to make Gustavus Adolphus react). Also, if stealth is required: Do Not Stomp the Grass to Scare the Snakes: an imprudent act will give your position/intention away to the enemy.
- Borrow a Corpse to Resurrect the Soul: "resurrect" a technology, a method, an ideology... that has become discarded for being "old-fashioned," reinterpreting said resurrected artifact for your own purposes (the Nazis appropriating the swastika -originally a Sanskrit lucky charm- and some Norse myths, aside from racial biology, to create their lore of the Aryan race).
- Lure the Tiger Off its Den: lure the opponent away from their position, separating them from their source of strength; one can also lure the tiger into one's own turf (the scorched earth tactics mentioned before also take advantage of the unfamiliar extreme climate -whether of Russia or Dorne-, for which the enemy is not prepared).
- Let Loose in Order to Capture: to avoid bloodshed, "al enemigo que huye puente de plata"; since a cornered victim will make a desperate strike to win or die, leave the one you have cornered a tiny shred of hope to escape, a hope spot which is actually a ruse. When the "hope" of freedom is proven a falsehood that had hitherto been taken for granted, the broken enemy will surrender without a fight.
- Toss Out a Brick to Get Jade: bait the enemy; make them believe they gain something, or just make them react to them, and actually gain something more valuable (like information) in exchange. (This was the scheme Bellatrix Lestrange used on the leading cast in The Order of the Phoenix, that led to the demise of Sirius Black -the "brick" bait being the prophecy about the chosen one-). The Trojan Horse ruse also fits this kind of strategy.
- Defeat the Enemy by Taking the Leader: go straight for the leader, for his demise may throw the whole enemy host into demoralisation. This only works if the men do not love the leader, who holds the disorganised group together as a keystone, controlling them by fear (torture, punishments) or by offering them rewards (soldiers of fortune). If the followers truly love and respect the leader, however, they will retaliate (as Wallenstein found out at Lützen!).
- Steal the Firewood From Under the Pot: deny your enemy the resources needed to oppose you, sapping their strength to weaken their morale (another staple of scorched-earth tactics, seen in the Russian -burning the crops- as well as Dornish/Wallenstein cases -poisoning the springs-; attacking supply lines and caravans of provisions/ammunition is another example). It can also be a human resource -an advisor, a pathfinder...- This works best when the enemy is already wavering, to weaken them even further.
- Trouble the Waters to Catch Fish: use confusion to further your own goals. When the enemy is dealing with uncertainty, create more chaos to confuse the enemy even more, using stealth and/or distraction to strike them with their guard down. It's more or less like Looting a House on Fire, only that you have fanned the flames into conflagration in the first place (in the former strategy, the "fire" is completely force majeure and internal schisms). Thus, Richelieu and Wallenstein employed intrigue to develop the schisms within the Habsburg Empire -between the Kaiser and the electors, between the Catholic electors and the Society of Jesus, between Catholic and Protestant electors...- The Cardinal even took advantage of Wallenstein's asking the Crown and the Church for a share of the "Edict of Restitution cake" to orchestrate the cashiering of the Duke of Friedland from his position as the Kaiser's first sword.
- Shed the Cicada's Golden Shell: disguise as someone/something inconspicuous or masquerade as someone/something else (false flag ruses, such as Gustavus III's Swedish "Cossacks" or Hitler's Operation Himmler to justify invasion of Poland; also the age-old trope of Dressing as the Enemy to infiltrate or escape them -whether Winkies, Stormtroopers, Dai Li, or whatever; it's been also used in real life, by Cervantes breaking Moorish prison dressed as a janissary!-).
- Lock the Door to Catch the Thief: let the enemy ensnare themselves, let them get hoist by their own petards. Tempt them into situations that lead to a flight forwards, and then cut off their supply lines. Once the prey is trapped, lock the door for good. Set a trap and make it click completely when the enemy has fallen hook, line, and sinker (again, Wallenstein marching into Saxony to attract Gustavus Adolphus, for the latter to give battle in November).
- Befriend Someone Far and Attack Someone Near: distant allies make good allies for it is unwise for one to invade them, while the easiest lands to attack are those closest to one's own (in the Holy Land, Israel was and is allied with Western powers -the US, the UK, and so forth- while waging war against the Palestine territories).
- Obtain a Common Enemy: if you have two of your enemies at each others' throats, ally with one of them and borrow the resources of that ally to attack the common enemy, promising them that they'll be rewarded once they've defeated the third party; then, once said common enemy is defeated, use those resources to turn against your temporary ally (Wallenstein surely had this in mind for Sweden, hoping to ally with Gustavus Adolphus against the Kaiser!).
- Replace the Pillars with Rotten Timbers: Damage the sustaining structures, physical or ideological, on which the enemy depends, and replace them with systems which you control; making them dependent on you, discrediting their allies/friends/advisors and/or gaining monopoly of their resources... This can only work if you have got their trust. (Again, Iago is a master at this, and so is Baelish. Also, in 1631, the Catholic League relied completely on the granaries of Friedland, leading to a debt with Wallenstein that had to be paid... hence the taking of Magdeburg and Leipzig... which led to the League's defeat at Breitenfeld).
- Point at One to Curse Another: use indirect means of getting your way; use third parties as intermediaries; threaten or punish -physically or emotionally- the weak to keep the strong in awe of you; make an example of those who oppose you by using disproportionate punishment (many cases of scapegoats who had to "drink the hemlock" for their executioners to frighten others into submission, such as Hans Hermann von Katte -beheaded by the Sergeant King of Prussia to shock his son Frederick- or Elia Martell and her children -gruesomely killed on the orders of Tywin Lannister-. Also the Aragonian king Ramiro the Monk and his notorious "bell of Huesca," beheading twelve feudal lords; Charles IX of Sweden also executed the most notorious of his brother John III's partisan lords to keep himself on the throne he had usurped).
- Wear the Mask of a Fool While Remaining Smart: for who believes the fool, who is never taken seriously? It's the least suspicious person! Pretend you are stupid, or insane, or intoxicated, or physically weak, or not left- or right-handed (as Íñigo Montoya does), but keep your wits about you. Then strike when they least expect it, showing your true wit or strength when it's time to attack! There must be method in the madness (The most vivid example I can come up with is Hamlet feigning insanity during his revenge on a usurper stepfather; "method in the madness" indeed. Tyrion Lannister is also a master at wearing, in his case, the mask of a lush as well as that of a fool. Likewise, Gretel plays stupid to lure the wicked witch into the oven. Used when it applies to physical strength/skill, I would go for Íñigo Montoya switching sword hand and revealing that he is not left-handed! Ryoma, in The Prince of Tennis, usually plays right-handed, but switches racket hand -he's a born lefty- when the going gets tough!).
- Lure Them Onto the Roof, Then Pull the Ladder Away: ensure there is no going back; employ ruse to lure the enemy into dangerous terrain, then, having cornered them completely, cut off their route of escape, communication, and resources; rendering the enemy isolated, unable to retreat, and bereft of supplies... (Again, scorched earth tactics... trying to get involved in a land war in Russia or Dorne... but also, to coax one's own allies to follow one, the burning of bridges after crossing streams and the burning of ships after having landed ashore to ensure that there's no turning back and that the dice are cast -"quemar las naves", as both Hernán Cortés and Nymeria did upon landing-).
- Deck the Trees with Artificial Blossoms: appear powerful when you have far less power. Make it appear that you have more resources to keep a stronger enemy at bay (Tordenskiöld's soldiers marching around Carlsten Fortress, ostensibly 20000 strong but actually 500 strong; the Swedish scarecrow "guards" on the walls of Poltava. Another example would be the gruffalo story, in which the mouse and the gruffalo travel together through the woods, the gruffalo frightens the predators, but does not realise he is the dreaded one, and believes that the mouse is the one the predators fear, as the mouse herself had told the gruffalo beforehand when the two of them met), or appear weaker and lacking more resources to dissuade the enemy. Make a trifle appear valuable / something worthless appear useful by the use of ruse.
- Exchange the Roles of Host and Guest: usurp leadership in a scenario in which you would be subordinate; create dependency, reversing the roles so that the more powerful opponent finds themselves in a subordinate position. Pretend to be the guest to be accepted, but develop and become the owner from within (Here, the Duke of Friedland and Iago give some textbook examples: Wallenstein offering the Count of Tilly Friedland grain to create a debt that Tilly would have to pay, to weaken the Catholic League -as said in Replace the Beams with Rotten Timbers- / Wallenstein offering the Kaiser the money and the provisions to raise "the Empire's own" army; Iago convinces all of his victims, who outrank him, that he is the perfect confidant, then -thanks to their trust- has them over a barrel. In Judges 4, Yael welcomes a fleeing, vanquished General Sisera and caters to his every need -exhaustion, thirst, concealment from the enemy-, then, when he has let his guard down the most, she literally hammers home a point!).
- Honey Trap: send the enemy irresistible pleasures of the flesh, such as offerings of money, wenches, or drugs (strong drink, opium...) as a gift with pretenses of peace, to distract them and sow confusion among them. The leader and/or the officers, having given in, will neglect their duties and lower their guard; also, suspicious individuals on the enemy side will find themselves at odds with those who have given in to the honey trap, creating internal dissension and even intrigues (This is, in a nutshell, Queen Medb's MO in the Táin: more specifically, she uses the promise of her daughter's hand, mead, and bards to lure new allies. In the Old Testament, Yael's killing of Sisera and Judith's of Holofernes may also count in. In the Gesta Romanorum story 88 this is combined with the Empty Fort when an outnumbered general feigns surrender, retreats, and resigns his castle or campsite, with all the provisions therein, into the hands of the outnumbering enemy: "Now the castles -or campsites- were furnished with casks of wine empoisoned with the seed of a certain herb; insomuch, that whosoever drank of it immediately fell asleep. He knew that his opponents were starved; and that, overjoyed to find such excellent quarters, they would drink to excess, and fall into the half death-like quiet of sleep. They did so, and the general, returning, put them all to death.").
- Fling Open the Gates to the Empty Fort: when you are vulnerable, make the enemies think twice about attacking you; double bluff the enemies by pretending weakness, as if to entice them to attack. Appear ready to fight, but make the enemy suspect there is a ruse when in fact there is none. When the enemy is superior in numbers and your situation is such that you expect to be overrun at any moment, then drop all pretense of military preparedness, act calmly and taunt the enemy, so that the enemy will think you have a huge ambush hidden for them. It works best by acting calm and at ease when your enemy expects you to be tense. This ploy is only successful if in most cases you do have a powerful hidden force and only sparsely use the empty fort strategy. (The ruse at the storming of the Marienberg Fortress, ostensibly garrisoned by unarmed Jesuits, which Gustavus Adolphus, however, quickly saw through; Tywin Lannister opening the gates of King's Landing to the rebels, ditto Vibhishana in Sri Lanka - In the Gesta Romanorum story 88, this is combined with the Honey Trap when an outnumbered general feigns surrender, retreats, and resigns his castle or campsite, with all the provisions therein, into the hands of the outnumbering enemy: "Now the castles -or campsites- were furnished with casks of wine empoisoned with the seed of a certain herb; insomuch, that whosoever drank of it immediately fell asleep. He knew that his opponents were starved; and that, overjoyed to find such excellent quarters, they would drink to excess, and fall into the half death-like quiet of sleep. They did so, and the general, returning, put them all to death.").
- Use the Enemy's Own Spies to Sow Dissension: recruit moles, or double agents, or fifth columnists, or turncoat informers (Judas Iscariot); and employ them to "sow weeds among the wheat." When preoccupied with settling internal disputes, the enemy's ability to confront external threats is compromised. Then, after the stratagems have been successfully carried out, reward these expendable moles as a traitor deserves.
- Injure Yourself to Gain the Enemy's Trust: the Wounded Gazelle Gambit. Win their trust through sympathy, pretending you have been hurt. A variant is to take extreme risks (ie "suicide" risks) to prove yourself to them. On one hand, the enemy is lulled into lowering their guard, since you are not being regarded as an immediate threat. The second application is a way of ingratiating yourself with your enemy by pretending the injury was caused by a mutual enemy (like the stepsisters do in Disney's Cinderella, by accusing her of stealing their accessories; or the twin cats incriminate Lady in front of Aunt Sarah, by making her appear as the real culprit. Iago also employs the Wounded Gazelle Gambit, being injured as he tried to restrain a drunken Cassio, by making it appear that he was overly concerned about the lieutenant's alleged addiction).
- Chain Multiple Stratagems: pile up two or more of these strategies which have been explained before, either as a cause-and-effect chain or having Plan A, Plan B, Plan C, and so forth as backup (Iago, Wallenstein, and Baelish have made such chains of stratagems).
- If Everything Else Fails, Retreat. Nothing more remains to explain than the same axiom in Swedish: "Bättre fly än illa fäkta" (Better to Flee than Sadly Fighting Be). Retreating, unlike surrendering, is temporary -you'll lose the battle, but still be able to win the war-; and everyone learns more from their mistakes.
domingo, 20 de diciembre de 2015
THE WESTERIOUS CHRONICLES
These are the Vocaloid/Westeros fusion filks I had as bunnies for a while. Mostly Evillious Chronicles mashups, as you will read. It all is becoming the Westerious AU (Westeros+Evillious), which includes A Sacrifice of Ice and Fire, in spite of Hitobashira not being an Evillious song. I have already done the Chrono Story and answered the question of "will I be able to pull such a bunny out of my hat?" This has been like laying out a puzzle and seeing that all the pieces fit... is gratifying indeed.
THE WESTERIOUS CHRONICLES
DISCLAIMER/WARNING: DUE TO THE NATURE OF BOTH CROSSED-OVER UNIVERSES (THE EVILLIOUS CHRONICLES AND THE WORLD OF ICE AND FIRE), THIS SAGA IS DARK AND FULL OF GRAPHIC CONTENT.
READ AT YOUR OWN RISK, IF YOUR COURAGE, YOUR COMMON SENSE, AND/OR YOUR PASSION FOR VOCALOID AND/OR ASOIAF ARE ENOUGH TO DARE. NEVERTHELESS, DISCRETION IS ADVISED.
THE LANNISTERS' CHILD IS AN ONLY CHILD: Backstory set centuries ago on another planet, but in two different dimensions. In one dimension, Jaime Lannister is the only child of the widow Joanna, and he is a tomgirl who likes to crossdress and put on make-up. In another dimension, Cersei Lannister is the only child of the divorcé Tywin, and she is a teen prodigy of science, especially genetics and dimensional research. As young adults, their paths cross quite unexpectedly, leading them both to a planet on a third dimension, on the continent they and their peers, settlers after a great pandemic, will call Westeros... These Lannisters will become the ancestors and the past lives of the Lannister twins born in Westeros centuries later. The maid who became Jaime's fiancée and gave him her uniform is the Lyanna Stark of his universe, while the scientist Cersei's boss (and the villain here) is the Rhaegar Targaryen of her universe.
THE STORY OF WESTEROS: Chrono Story in Westeros, acting as a prelude to both A Sacrifice of Ice and Fire and the Deadly Sins Cycle. The Seven Gods unleash Seven Sins from the late Aegon V and the newborn Rhaegar, and Aerys and Rhaella (wards of the former and parents of the latter), still young and about to become the Mad King and Queen, are caught in the eye of the storm. The role of Elluka is played by a young Rhaegar, ostensibly the narrator of the whole saga from a vantage point in the afterlife.
PROJECT [LYA]: The whole Rhaegar and Lyanna affair had to be woven as well into the Westerious Chronicles, et voilà! A Lyaegar story, yet another one that fits the plot of both 'verses perfectly, that fills yet another hole in the puzzle that is The Westerious Chronicles
A SACRIFICE OF ICE AND FIRE (this one is a whole cycle, aside from not by Akuno-P): Hitobashira Alice / of Sacrifice in Westeros, previous generation: 1) Lyanna 2) Rhaegar 3) Elia 4) Cersei & Jaime... Lyaegar and Lannincest, aside from the Elia backstory...
THE INSANITY OF CROWN PRINCE JOFFREY: eighteenth-century AU, with occult elements. Pretty much complying with Joff's own character arc, but also with traits of Koschei and Bluebeard. And a good dash of gratuitous French ('cuz, eighteenth-century AU). This was the first Deadly Sins mashup out of all of them I made. And it's paved the way for a whole surprising universe...
EVIL EPICUREAN WYMAN MANDERLY: A lurid Westerosi tale no TV series watcher has ever known... The best pork pies north of the Neck... and Freys that keep on disappearing... Oh, and I made Wyman left-handed on Liza's advice (after all, there are very few born lefties in Westeros: Arya in canon [+Lyanna, Stannis, Oberyn in my headcanon] confirmed).
GIFT FROM THE LAVENDER PRINCE: Liza advised me to do it as Oberyn vs. Tywin (we both second the theory)... so this is an Oberyn character study, which makes it truly redoubtable. Valerian is a tranquilizing herb, also known as "busy Lizzie," which I referenced in the original title, before switching to lavender, fitting for a drier and sunnier Mediterranean climate, like that of Dorne, and with the same soothing properties. I use "gift" with a lower-case g first and then "Gift" with an upper-case G (German noun convention) to keep the bilingual pun going on.
THE TAILOR OF GULLTOWN: Petyr, Petyr, pumpkin-eatyr, had a Cat and could not keep her... Basically a Petelyn story, PetyrxSansa at the end, with elements of Sweeney Todd. The inspiration came from "The Tailor Shop of Envizaka" and Middlefinger's own character arc, aside from the musical set in Victorian London.
THE DAUGHTER OF EVIL/THE GUARD OF EVIL: Lannincest version of the Deadly Sins songs most suitable for Lannincest, mashed up. Inspiration from Catherine the Great (whom I say reminds me of Cersei). And a surprising valonqar ending.
JUDGEMENT OF BIGOTRY: Basically, Stannisxhis family (wife and child). I replaced greed with fanatism/bigotry, the besetting sin of the King of Dragonstone, and added an afterlife POV in which Stannis, like in my Three Brothers AU, comes face to face with the Stranger...
THE BROADSWORD OF REVENGE: 'Cuz Brienne deserves her own Deadly Sins mashup about her comeuppance with Stannis. Headcanon in my own mind's eye, starring the Maid of Tarth, and also a switching POV (the other side of the story) for Judgement of Bigotry. Renlienne mentioned in backstory, as well as Stoneheart.
CAPRICCIO MUMMERY: Capriccio Farce, turned Westerosi style... a nice way to wrap things up in my Westerious Chronicles. Oh, and some Jaimienne to make up for the Lannincest and Renlienne in past filks of this saga. Aside from a lot of loose ends being tied up in the afterlife... PS. Shireen's status wound up being a thing I have to shed some light on:
The Director of the Theatre is a very minor side character, in fact an unseen character (never seen or heard, only mentioned by name-title as the one who commissions a certain play script or opera libretto) in Oscar Wilde's tales; they commissions play scripts and opera libretti for the stage (regardless of if the young bohemian students who pen these works freeze to death on cold winter nights, without being able to afford kindling or matches). Even though the character's title in English is epicene, ie gender-neutral, Victorian patriarchy has made translators render the character as always male in target texts (el Director del Teatro, le Directeur du Théâtre, etc.). Still, in English the word "director" is epicene -- so feel free to imagine a female Director of the Theatre (also, in the Hungarian version, the epicenity is retained in the character's name being lifted straight out of the Magyar translation of the Wilde tale: a Színházigazgató).
Shireen apparently uses this ghost character --wealthy, artistically inclined, and above all an epicene (in the source text) unseen character-- as an escapist power fantasy for a doll girl who is a terminally ill only child of a powerful official. She sees all her dolls as the performers (actors, ballerini, musicians) and the playwrights at her command. (Interestingly, the Hungarian character name -a Színházigazgató- also echoes the name of the escapist who incarnates the role in Western name order: "színház", theatre, sounding like "Shireen"; "igazgató", director, sounding like "Baratheon") When she died in the fire along with her parents, she became the Director of the Theatre in her dreams, and treats all the other souls in this stage-themed afterlife she has created as her living doll troupe. Only Stannis and Selyse are barred from entering.
When I say that "she inherited the title of Director of the Theatre" from Stannis, I mean that her illness was the catalyst for her parents doing everything they could, forbidden or not, in order to save her, while she felt powerless and guilty and in need to assert some control herself over others, no matter if these others were people -- and also that this relates to Stannis being absent and "too busy" with his official duties during her childhood, which further catalysed her into a theatre-loving doll girl, who looked up to both of her parents while feeling all those feels. But that is all in the past, especially after death -- and besides, did those two ever know anything in detail about her little shows while locked in her rooms?
SEVEN SINS AND SEVEN PUNISHMENTS: Seven sinners, seven smitings. The Seven Gods channeled by the Seven Sinners discuss the story. This could close the circle... or not?
THE STORY OF WESTEROS
AERYS:
Is it the song of nightingales I hear? Can you hear it?
RHAELLA:
No, 'tis the despaired cry of the court.
AERYS:
Is it the light of the full moon I see? Can you see it?
RHAELLA:
No, 'tis the lurid glow of the flames.
The person we once called our guardian...
AERYS:
...is burning to a crisp within the keep we have left.
Leaving behind the original sin
that the gods broke into seven parts...
RHAELLA:
Lust is a flower...
AERYS:
...gluttony is a seed...
RHAELLA:
...pride is a jewel...
AERYS:
...jealousy is a waterfall...
RHAELLA:
...weariness is a breeze...
AERYS:
...bigotry is the ground...
RHAELLA+AERYS:
And lastly, wrath is a keep on fire...
Arise, arise, O Seven Sins,
filthy offshoots of our bloodline's inbreeding...
Turn around, on and on, on and on,
Prithee purify these Seven Sins...
please, if that could be...
RHAEGAR:
Countless brother-husbands taking sister-wives
scattered the Seven Sins abroad across this world...
The Seven Gods, watching over Summerhall,
blessed the newborn prince entrusted to seek them...
"No matter how much I may sacrifice,
I will always be there to fulfil it, even in the afterlife..."
After falling recklessly in love
and losing everything that he prized, even his own life...
The afterlife he led in the Stranger's Heaven brought
unto him nought but unsubstantial emptiness...
The one who had it all and who lost it all...
Which destiny awaits? What does he wish for?
Until the end of times...
Wrought by and brought upon
a single bloodline,
broken into seven pieces:
this is the story of sin...
The wistful romance
of the poet prince born in the flames,
where it all began, at Summerhall...
this is the Story of Westeros...
Lulila, lulila, lulila, lulila...
Lulila, lulila, lulila, lulila...
Lulila, lulila, lulila, lulila...
Lulila, lulila, lulila, lulila...
...................................................................................................
PROJECT [LYA]
-Lyanna's Project-
This is the story of how it all began...
From when shall I begin to tell my tale?
Shall I tell you anything I know?
My name is Lyanna Stark,
a maiden unlike any other.
My beloved's name is Rhaegar,
the learned future king of all the lands...
He kissed me and he softly, lovingly told me:
"You will become the mother of the Prince that was Promised...
Queen of Love and Beauty..."
RHAEGAR TARGARYEN HAD RECENTLY BECOME OBSESSED
WITH A CERTAIN CHAOTIC PROPHECY:
THE RETURN OF THE DARK FORCES
THAT ONCE HAUNTED THE WORLD DURING THE LONG NIGHT.
TO AVOID THE CATACLYSM,
CONVINCED THAT THE FATE OF EVERYONE RESTED ON HIS SHOULDERS,
HE ARRANGED A TOURNEY AT HARRENHAL...
Winter is Coming, a new Long Night approaches:
thus say our house words and the prophecy.
Only one will deliver us from the darkness,
and his will be the Song of Ice and Fire...
The Prince that was Promised must see the light of day...
A tourney was held at Harrenhal:
the potential mother was being searched for...
Seek the most unlikely maiden of them all...
The chosen one will be crowned Queen of Love and Beauty,
and she will bring a deliverer to light...
I don't understand the reason why I was the one chosen...
He said that he loved me, and clasped me in his slender arms...
After everything is done, let's elope, like star-crossed lovers,
to the Tower of Joy in Dorne; just the two of us.
The dragon seed has been sown within me at last...
I await the birth of the Prince that was Promised...
THE PROJECT REQUIRED AN UNUSUAL MAIDEN
TO BRING THE PRINCE THAT WAS PROMISED TO THE LIGHT.
ELIA NYMEROS MARTELL OF DORNE, RHAEGAR'S CONSORT,
WAS, HOWEVER, NOT STRONG OF HEALTH ENOUGH.
FORTUNATELY, LYANNA, THE BRIDE OF LORD ROBERT BARATHEON,
WAS THE ONE WHO FIT ALL THE REQUIREMENTS.
-Rhaegar's Project-
This is the story of how it all began...
From when shall I begin to tell my tale?
Shall I tell you everything I know?
My name is Rhaegar Targaryen,
the learned future king of all the lands.
Unfortunately, I bring the worst of news:
the project was an utter failure.
My wife Elia is too weak to bear more children...
All of my ambitions and dreams have disappeared...
AFTER HAVING BROUGHT TWO CHILDREN,
RHAENYS AND AEGON, TO THE WORLD,
ELIA HAD WEAKENED NOT TO BEAR ANY MORE CHILDREN.
The Tourney of Harrenhal is a Seven-sent chance for me:
thanks to its consequences, I will rule this vast realm.
The Starks and the Baratheons say I wrested the bride from them...
Now it's the time to defend my rights...
The tourney began,
the crowned one was the daughter of Winterfell...
Temptation approached; we became lovers.
"This crown of winter roses will make things easier..."
Without thinking twice, I placed it on her dark locks.
My dear Lyanna, forgive me for having ruined your life...
Because of our love for each other, a war broke out...
But, as I had intended to, we lived together...
And then, I realized that I really love you.
After everything is done, let's elope, like star-crossed lovers,
to the Tower of Joy in Dorne; just the two of us.
RHAEGAR:
I love you...
LYANNA:
And I love you...
The evening stars were corrupted...
The moon and the stars in the southern sky
disappeared...
FOLLOWING THE TOURNEY OF HARRENHAL,
LYANNA AND RHAEGAR ELOPED TO THE TOWER OF JOY,
IN THE DORNISH MARCHES, WHERE THEY LIVED TOGETHER.
MARCHING TOWARDS KING'S LANDING,
A REBEL ARMY AGAINST THE CROWN
WAS SPEARHEADED BY STORMLORD ROBERT BARATHEON,
THE FIANCÉ OF LYANNA STARK.
-Robert's Project-
This is the story of how it all began...
From when shall I begin to tell my tale?
Shall I tell you all I know?
My name is Robert Baratheon,
eldest of three orphan brothers, Lord of the Stormlands.
Rhaegar and Lyanna were those I pursued,
Lyanna and Rhaegar were both of them gone.
I seek the Queen of Love and Beauty, my bride, wherever she is,
and the Crown Prince, for having taken her away...
ROBERT AND RHAEGAR FACED ONE ANOTHER
AT THE DECISIVE BATTLE OF THE TRIDENT:
THE CONFRONTATION THAT SHAPED THE HISTORY OF WESTEROS...
..................................................................................................
Once upon a time, in a certain place, there was a little dream.
No one knew who had dreamt that dream, and no one cared at all.
This made the little dream think:
I do not want to disappear. How can I make people dream of me?
And thus, the dream thought and thought, and at last had an idea:
"I will make people come to me, leading them astray,
and let them create worlds of their own..."
A SACRIFICE OF ICE AND FIRE
Story the First: The Lost Swordswoman
The first Alice was a maiden righteous, bold, and free,
clasping in her left hand the hilt of a trusty sword.
She cut down the unfair and set right everything gone wrong,
wayward was her scarlet path, far from wedding a lord.
This Alice got lost somewhere far away,
disappeared, a fallen woman, into sin thus lead astray...
They found her bereft of life, within the Tower of Joy...
She lay in blood and wilted roses, with her newborn boy.
Story the Second: The Star-Crossed Prince
The second Alice was a clever prince, so frail and shy,
strumming the strings of his heart and harp to many a song...
Singing and imagining that prophecies were true,
he created an insane world where nothing was wrong.
This Alice loved and picked a winter rose so blue...
he was slain by the stormlord for having made his bride untrue...
Crushed his breastplate and his chest, the lungs and heart within...
Once beloved, now he's hated, due to his last sin.
Story the Third: The Broken Princess
The third Alice was sweet, with skin warm and dark as gold,
the friendliest, loveliest one born on the coast of Dorne...
She wedded the poet prince and dwelled within his court,
giving him two children; when he left, she felt no scorn.
This Alice was the princess of all the land...
She suffered a gruesome fate at a traitor's harsh command...
As she struggles for her life, she sees her children die...
then, her maidenhead once lost, she yields with one last sigh.
Following the woodland paths no one's trod before...
Crossing at the ford that still runs scarlet with gore...
Though you have been invited to the Royal Keep...
In my heart you will always dwell...
The fourth Alice were twins with green eyes and golden hair,
so wilful and curious, like any other child...
crossing many thresholds as their lives go on and on...
yet now they're no children and life is no longer mild.
The older sister's headstrong... and...
the younger brother's insecure...
They think they are the closest to their wonderland, for sure...
From their wildest dreaming they will never, e'er awake,
trapped forever in the lives they lead for their hearts' sake...
Who will be the next Alice?
...................................................................................................
THE INSANITY OF CROWN PRINCE JOFFREY
Thus... Allons donc danser!
JOFFREY:
Once more, a beautiful girl
throws herself at my feet before me...
What a sincere smile is hers...
she will doubtless become my next mistress...
Consecrated as an infant to the Maiden,
the Goddess of Love blessed me with the power that
every girl or lady who looks into these cold, green eyes
will fall as if transfixed right before me...
SHAE:
With the power to conquer every reluctant heart...
(Le pouvoir de prendre tous les coeurs qu'il veut...)
ROS:
The lonely young man, into his boudoir at the royal palace...
(L'héritier aux cheveux d'or, seul dans son magnifique boudoir...)
SHAE:
...takes up, one by one, every female that he is pleased with...
(...il emporte, l'une après l'autre, toutes les dames qu'il trouve remarquables...)
ROS:
...gathering them all for his collection...
(...il a la passion de les collectionner...)
JOFFREY:
Like the taste of poison concealed in the most intense liqueur,
like the pleasure of cold steel plunged into the silk of their skin,
blood, sweat, tears, and strychnine that combine into
that alluring purple liquid, so cool yet so warm...
Une fois déshabillée, on ne peut pas retourner dans la réalité!
CATALOGUE OF MISSING PERSONS IN THE KINGDOMS OF WESTEROS
Shae of Lorath, 20-21, of King's Landing, sutler whore
Ros, 18-19, of Winterfell, whore
Ellaria Sand, 30-31, of Sunspear, paramour
Obara Sand, 20, of the Water Gardens, spearwoman
Nymeria Sand, 18, of the Water Gardens, kunoichi
Tyene Sand, 16, of the Reach, septa
Sansa Stark, 16, of Winterfell, noblewoman/dressmaker
JOFFREY:
My portraits of yore burned to a crisp,
the busts of me shattered,
I killed my past self...
I want to forget my lovely face,
for which my stepfather made me feel such pain...
(Maudits mes parents, mes yeux, mes cheveux...)
I clasp the lovely maiden and steal a kiss from her lips...
(Elle résiste, mais je l'embrasse encore...)
Once she was my first fiancée, of our childhood days,
the frightened one who shied away from me....
(Oh, Sansa! Ne me quittez pas encore!
Je veux être aimé de toi!)
SANSA:
Since a certain day, ladies across the vast realm...
(les plus belles dames de tout le vaste royaume...)
ELLARIA:
...vanished, one by one, into thin air without forewarning...
(...disparues sans aucune trace...)
SANSA:
They were mothers, daughters, aunts, sisters, friends, brides, wives...
(Il avait beaucoup de familles plongées dans le désespoir...)
ELLARIA:
Their loved ones knew not what to do...
(Étaient-elles condamnées par toujours?)
JOFFREY:
The intense hue of ecstasy in the darkness of midnight,
passion beyond limits, utterly unrestrained...
illusions so true to life that they are taken for reality...
I am no longer a person at all...
(Qu'est-ce que je suis?)
Indulging in depravity, to defy the Seven Gods,
this is the soirée of insanity for which I desire...
(c'est la nuit de la décadence et de la démence...)
CATALOGUE OF MISSING PERSONS IN THE KINGDOMS OF WESTEROS (continued)
Taena Merryweather, 30, of the Reach, noblewoman
Léonnette Fossoway, 24-25, of the Reach, noblewoman
Elinor Tyrell, 17, of Highgarden, noblewoman
Megga Tyrell, 17, of Highgarden, noblewoman
Alla Tyrell, 16, of Highgarden, noblewoman
Mya Stone, 24-25, of the Vale of Arryn, sherpa
Brienne of Tarth, 19, of Tarth, knight
Meera Reed, 18, of the Neck, crannogmaiden
In the meantime... a beautiful girl has a conversation with a wistful Dornishman...
OBERYN (giving her a necklace with purple crystal pendants): The pay you give me is not bad for a Tyrell of Highgarden... well, a common enemy is a rightful reason for our lands to ally. After all, my paramour and daughters are held captive there as well...
The maiden, twinkles in her clever eyes, puts on the necklace as the Dornishman takes the silk sachet from her...
Later on, that self-same maiden enters the ballroom at the royal court, confidently, curtsying and smiling warmly...
JOFFREY:
Once more, a new beautiful lady,
(...celle-ci est intelligente aussi... quelle découverte!)
She answers to my every beck and call,
and she is as pleased with me as I am with her...
Viens, Margaery, ma chêre, danser dans le boudoir...
She played so wistfully with the triggers of my firearms...!
After we embrace and kiss so intensely,
voulez-vous être mon échansonne?
She pours our best liquor into the sparkling glass cups,
wish to each other's health, a twinkle and a clink,
a draught of crystal fire searing my throat...
Suddenly, I feel a sharp pain in my chest,
my lips are locked, I cannot breathe...
SANSA:
A maiden of unusual cleverness, whose best friend had disappeared...
(Elles étaient presque soeurs, très prochaines l'une de l'autre...)
MARGAERY:
...traced her steps towards the ostentatious halls of the evil one...
(...bien sûr, l'amie égarée sarait prisonnière là...)
SANSA:
She put on her best and shone with wit, thus the evil one was soon cajoled...
(...déçu d'une flatteuse qu'il croyait sincère...)
MARGAERY:
...and she put a purple crystal, which quickly dissolved, into his cup...
(...et, à la santé d'elle, il avala sa mort avec la liqueur...)
JOFFREY:
Cold sweat coursing through my veins, with the poison I had drunk unaware,
I stagger, half-conscious, and fall backwards on the cold, hard pavement.
Tainted blood depriving me of air, racking me with searing pain,
as my lips and fingertips are slowly dyed purple...
As I lie tossing and writhing feverishly on the cold pavement,
all the ladies I have collected awaken and flee the boudoir,
The last one to leave looks over her shoulder into my blood-shot veiled eyes...
for an instant... as I struggle to recognize her features...
It was my childhood friend... Sansa! Wait!
Sansa! Wait!
Je ne t'ai pas dit que je t'aime...
(and I cannot, it is too late...)
..............................................................................................
EVIL EPICUREAN WYMAN MANDERLY
Thus, make sure you leave nothing left on your platter.
In the grand banquet hall of a North-born Reacher,
the feast that begins anew is yet another last supper.
The dishes served would make any other person wince,
yet the hefty master devours them with a smile...
The name of this lord is Wyman Manderly,
and he used to be served the finest rarities north of the Neck...
Yet, at the end, what he ended up desiring was
the most gruesome ingredient upon this world...
Bend the knee and pay your respects
to our liege, Lord Wyman Manderly!
All the ingredients that exist
rightfully belong to His Lordship!
Devour everything on the golden platters!
There is always room for more!
Even the maybe lethally poisonous blue glaze
is nothing but the crowning spice on the main course!!
Suck the hollow bones empty, and then, devour them!!
If you're not satisfied, why not taste the platters?
This evening's supper, this orgy quaffed thus heartily,
is still rather far from being over...
Freshly-Gathered Weirwood Syrup
Cold Fruit Soup with Candied Winter Rose and Reach Rose Petals
Assorted Mushrooms of the Northern Woods
Reach-Style Mince Pies Made with our Greenhouse Fruits
Spicy Honeycakes with Arbour Raisins and Sugarspun Lace
Fresh Greenhouse Fruits Out of their Season and Climate
Arbour Rosé Laced with Shade of the Evening
Sunflower and Pumpkin Flower Salad
Rosehip Soup, Highgarden Style
Frey-Style Riverlands Carpaccio
Our Famous Reach-Style Pork Pie
Our Famous Reach-Style Black Pudding
Reach-Style Lemoncakes and Berrycakes with Sugarspun Roses
Arbour Gold Laced with Lysene Brandy
The newly-arrived Riverlands kitchen-maid, a born Frey,
said in a low voice, in a whisper rather soft and shy...
"I desire to be discharged from your service, Your Lordship..."
Hmph! Such backstabbing upstart traitors!
Bend the knee and pay your respects
to our liege, Lord Wyman Manderly!
Anyone who betrays his trust
will have to pay the heaviest of prices!
Devour everything on the golden platters!
Today's feast will be unlike any other!!
With auburn hair shining with a reddish tinge,
this one sure goes down smoothly indeed...
Let Arbour gold flow to wash down our rarities!
If you are not satisfied, feel free to ask for seconds!!
Hey, you, little cupbearer over there...!
I wonder what you taste like...
Today's Supper
Sunflower and Riverlands Clover Salad
Rosehip Soup, The Crossing Style
(***Due to certain circumstances, this course has been censored***)
Our Famous Reach-Style Pork Pie
Our Famous Reach-Style Black Pudding (Is that human blood?)
Spicy Honeycakes with Arbour Raisins and Sugarspun Lace
Reach-Style Lemoncakes and Berrycakes with Sugarspun Roses
Arbour Gold Laced with Lysene Brandy
After Supper
(***Due to certain circumstances, this course has been censored***)
(***Due to certain circumstances, this course has been censored***)
(***Due to certain circumstances, this course has been censored***)
(***Due to certain circumstances, this course has been censored***)
(***Due to certain circumstances, this course has been censored***)
(***Due to certain circumstances, this course has been censored***)
(***Due to certain circumstances, this course has been censored***)
As the days went by, the keep gradually became empty...
There is nothing and no one left but His Lordship within...
Even then, he keeps on seeking more of his drug,
the most gruesome ingredient upon this world...
"If I leave any leftovers, they will smite me..."
Devour everything that you may be pleased with!
Suddenly, he caught sight of his own right hand...
And, quietly, affably, he smiled and he said to himself:
"There is something I have never tasted before..."
The lurid last supper of Lord Wyman
consisted of no other ingredient but himself...
Now he knows every flavour in the Known World,
but no one will ever know what he tasted like...
The cupbearer and the kitchen maid are both Frey prisoners of war and my own OC:s. I felt that I had to make that explanation for you, dear readers. The story of the Frey pies is one of the most lurid subplots kept out of the TV series, and there is still speculation around it...
..............................................................................................
GIFT FROM THE LAVENDER PRINCE
gift (English)
noun
1. a present
2. a talent
3. something cheap, an easy task
Thus, 'tis time for you to get some rest...
Please, calm down with this gift of mine...
You can rest assured and soothed with this gift of mine...
Yes, I am the Lavender Prince who brings repose...
only so that you can be happy at last...
King's Landing, anno 300 after the Conquest
Even though hers was a marriage of state,
even though he left her, Elia still loved Rhaegar...
You're a straitlaced statesman, only caring for your position...
while I have still thought of my loved ones for decades...
You were after the lives of the princess and her children,
fearing that their descendants might take your place...
You've forgotten the price that you and I had to pay...
And that is fine as well, until the past resurfaces...
I can bear no longer to see you weary every day,
worn out by old age and by the pressure of statescraft...
so let me give you this good remedy...
It will soothe you and heal your weariness from within...
Take it as a present from me...
Please, calm down with this gift of mine...
You can rest assured and soothed with this gift of mine...
Yes, I am the Lavender Prince who brings repose...
only so that you can be happy at last...
..............................................................................................
THE TAILOR OF GULLTOWN
Thus, let's pin those sleeves...
On a quaint street in Gulltown, in the Vale of Arryn,
there lives a young man who runs a tailor's shop.
Having made himself, risen from obscurity,
now he makes clothes for wealthy townsfolk and for nobles...
However, there is a thought constantly on his mind:
the person he once admired as a child and whom he still loves...
"Even though I have made myself, though I am within your reach...
you never stay for long time under my scissors sign..."
But I have commissions, I've got to concentrate...
clutching my scissors in my right hand...
the scissors Mother once used for her needlework...
The sharper they are, the better they cut...
Catelyn... I am honoured to make your dresses and your accessories...
but can there be something more between us?
Today, like every day, there's nothing new under the sun...
when I went shopping, our eyes met on the marketplace...
There she was, Cat, with that bright auburn hair and those warm blue eyes...
But who was the gentleman who held her hand by her side?
That grey overcoat fits his serious frame like a glove,
and she appears to be very close to the stern gentleman...
I could not stand the sight any longer,
so off I dashed back into the shop...
But I've got work to do, I've got to concentrate...
clutching my scissors in my right hand...
Teardrops trickle down my cheeks and into my goatee
as I tweak the overcoat pinned down on the table, right before me...
There's an eerie athmosphere out on the streets,
as if a murder had taken place.
I saw Cat today once more, half-way crossing the bridge,
but who was the young man walking by her side?
She has a mournful countenance, there is sorrow in her eyes...
the dashing young gentleman dries up her tears by her side...
That cravat, embroidered with silver thread, fits him like a glove...
Ah... So this is the type of lover you prefer?
But I've got work to do, I've got to concentrate...
clutching my scissors in my right hand...
With blood-shot eyes, swollen and ablaze,
I tweak the cravat pinned down on the table, right before me...
But I've got work to do, I've got to concentrate...
clutching my scissors in my right hand...
How strange... have the scissors' blades always been scarlet?
Today, I will do my best with this cap as well...
At last, I am ready, I have finished.
If you are not the one who is going to come to me...
I will be the one who will come to you.
"The two blades of a pair of scissors work together by crossing each other.
Just like any decent husband and wife couple should do.
At least, that's what Mother used to say..."
In this smart grey overcoat,
this cravat embroidered with silver thread,
and this checkered newsy cap,
which I put on my head...
I have become
your kind of lover...
Now, Cat, what do you say?
Am I not dashing?
Today, nothing is the same at all.
The victim this time, the fourth one, was female:
The wife and mother of the Stark family...
like her spouse and sons, she appears to have been murdered.
On the other hand, she had been quite cruel.
"Good morning, pleased to meet you", she said.
As if I had perchance been a stranger to her,
as if I had perchance been a stranger to her...
But I've got work to do, I've got to concentrate...
clutching my scissors in my right hand...
the scissors for needlework which have been dyed crimson...
The sharper they are, the better they cut...
But we've got work to do, we've got to concentrate...
clutching my scissors in my right hand...
with the orphan girl I call my niece for an apprentice,
since I lost the mother, but the daughter is at least mine...
Sansa... we will have to leave this place for safety's sake,
and set shop elsewhere.
Like in King's Landing, the capital.
You've always wanted to live there, right, darling?
Well, we're setting sail tomorrow, lock, stock, and barrel.
I know you cannot say no...
Explanation: The three male murder victims are, in this order: Ned (coat), Robb (cravat), and Bran (cap). This was the second Westerious bunny I had, just to see Petyr as the killer in this song fit perfectly, like Joff in Venomania.
...............................................................................................
THE DAUGHTER OF EVIL/THE GUARD OF EVIL
CERSEI:
Thus, everyone bend the knee!
Once upon a time, somewhere in this world
there was a great kingdom with a decadent court,
and, high above them all, upon a throne of swords,
sat the young queen, aged just twenty-four.
She lived in a huge red castle outside the capital,
the commander of her guards looked quite similar to her,
her loutish husband had been "killed in an accident..."
her eldest son and heir was called Joffrey...
What more could she wish for?
If the realm treasury chanced to be out of funds,
there would always be the riffraff to oppress for more...
as for anyone who contradicted her commands...
they would only forfeit with their lives!
(Eddard Stark led to the scaffold, Arya watching)
CERSEI:
Thus, everyone bend the knee!
Scarlet and golden flower of evil, blooming feverishly, vividly,
all the puny weeds around will be absorbed into it...
JAIME:
You are my liege lady, I'm your faithful knight,
we are lovely twin siblings torn apart by chance...
If it is to protect you, I will break any oath,
I will betray myself, sacrifice the one I am...
We were born to much rejoicing, with great expectations,
blessed by pealing sept bells we were given our names...
However, selfish adults, to further their own ends,
split our future in twain and rent the tie that binds us...
Even if the whole world became your enemy,
I will stay true to you and protect you from harm...
so please rest assured, what are brothers and kingsguards for?
You are my liege lady, I'm your faithful knight,
we are pitiful twin siblings torn apart by chance...
If it is to protect you, I will break any oath,
I will betray myself, sacrifice the one I am...
The selfish queen fell madly in love with a young man
from the ruling household of the land of flowers,
but, however, his heart belonged to another:
the dashing lord of the stormy lands...
JAIME:
During a tourney, I first met the Lord of Storm's End,
then but a raven-haired stripling, but still a charming one...
so cheerful and kindly, with such a smile on his face...
I must say the truth: that I took a shine to him...
Intoxicated with jealousy, Her Grace
called for her lord father and her other advisors,
and, during the council, she coldly told them:
"War shall be declared on the Stormlands..."
JAIME:
But Her Grace's command, issued straight by herself,
is that Lord Renly shall be put to death...
I must lead her armies upon the battlefield,
since her wish is my command,
but why are my cheeks always wet with tears?
Countless villages were overrun,
and countless lives were lost in the fray...
So many common people suffering due to the war...
Their sorrow could not reach the detached queen...
CERSEI:
Ah, it's time for a drink and cake!
Scarlet and golden flower of evil, blooming beautifully,
though in a deranged manner,
and intrenched in so many thorns that it cannot be touched.
JAIME:
You are my liege lady, I'm your faithful knight,
we are deranged twin siblings torn apart by chance...
Today, there are lemoncakes washed down with Dornish red...
In response, you smile as innocently as always...
Agreeing that the wicked queen should be brought down,
finally the common people had to take to arms.
And spearheading the realmwide uprising was
a Faceless Swordswoman, an assassin deadly and swift...
All of the grudges that the smallfolk had pent up
finally led to riots, from Dorne to the Night's Watch...
Worn out by the Stormlands campaign, and by this conflict,
the queen's men soon turned cloak to the insurgents' side.
JAIME:
Before long, our regime will surely be destroyed
by the wrath of our angered subjects...
If they say that we rightly deserve this...
though it would be fitting retaliation for the Targaryens...
I will still oppose it.
In the end, the Red Keep itself wound up under siege,
its weary garrison had to hoist the white flag,
and the lovely young queen, whose star had begun to fade,
feared she'd share the fate of her kin's foes...
CERSEI:
I still remember Elia and her children... No! We shall never share their fate!
Scarlet and golden flower of evil, blooming sorrowfully...
as the paradise that had been made for her sake
is quickly becoming an inferno...
JAIME:
Let me put my left hand around your silky white throat...
I will set sail with the children, trust me, they will be safe.
It's all right, we're twins, and you are the eldest one...
Didn't the foretelling say your little brother would strangle you?
(click of a closing trachea)
You are a dying sinner, I am a fugitive,
we are saddened twin siblings torn apart by chance...
If you go down in history as a villainess,
then, I have the same blood flowing through my veins...
Once upon a time, somewhere in this world
there was a great kingdom with a decadent court,
and, high above them all, upon a throne of swords,
sat Her Grace, my adorable older sister.
Even if the whole world became your enemy,
(CERSEI: At last my time has come...)
I will stay true to you and protect you from harm...
(CERSEI: As the sept bells signal the end of my life...)
so please rest assured, what are brothers and kingsguards for?
(CERSEI: I do not dare to look at the crowd storming in)
There you are, sitting on the throne, with a dark collar, smiling...
JAIME:
You are my liege lady, I'm your faithful knight,
we are pitiful twin siblings torn apart by chance...
If it is to protect you, I will break any oath,
I will betray myself, sacrifice the one I am...
JAIME+CERSEI:
If I ever were to be reborn...
I would like to be with you once again...
Annotations: The swordswoman leading the uprising is Arya. But she is still leading the vanguard of the upcoming Targ invasion... and the poem references the "valonqar prophecy" that Cersei would be strangled by her little brother...
This was the third bunny I had in the Westerious saga, with Lannincest since Rin's and Len's characters in the Tale of Evil are so reminiscent of Cersei and Jaime (respectively) that there was another story that could be given a Westeros shot...
........................................................................................................
JUDGEMENT OF BIGOTRY
IN THE KINGDOMS OF WESTEROS, THERE ONCE WAS A MAN OF RANK WHO USED HIS RELIGIOUS CONVICTION AS FOUNDATION FOR HIS OWN PERSONAL GOALS.
HIS NAME WAS STANNIS BARATHEON, BUT HE WOULD BE KNOWN AS "AZOR AHAI" TO THOSE WHO FOLLOWED HIS CREED AND BANNER...
Thus, now it's time for the judgement.
CHAPTER I
THE BIGOT AND THE RELIGIOUS EXCUSE FOR WARFARE
Everyone is either good through and through
or utterly evil...
I am the Saviour,
I love righteousness more than anything else...
[Hearing] [Witness]
[Indictment] [Dismissal]
[Cross-Examination] [Defense]
[Prosecution] [Summons]
Even the most sinful can be redeemed
if they pay the price...
and that price is not paid in gold,
but in flesh and blood.
Rank, age, gender, descent...
all of that is irrelevant.
[Sinners] [Heretics]
[Deception] [Repression]
[Deceit] [Power]
[Decadence] [Usurpers]
What matters is if you have done right or wrong:
that is everything...
[Right] [Right]
[Right] [Right]
[Right] [Right]
[Right] [Right]
Your lives depend on me...
If you wish for salvation, let me see what you have done!
And thus, sin is my only consideration,
in the judgement of bigotry...
If you wish to leave the cold mire of damnation,
give me the reasons why to be redeemed or not...
CHAPTER II
THE DAUGHTER IN THE DREARY FORTRESS
AND
THE SAVIOUR REBORN
Even for my daughter, with her face covered in gray scales,
I need to be stainless (sinless)...
[TERMINAL ILLNESS] [FAMILY]
[CONCERN] [DAMNATION]
[MIRACLES] [HOPE]
[RED LADY] [FRIENDSHIP]
If I purge this world of sinners, of depravity,
my wishes will come true...
[CONVERT] [LORD OF LIGHT]
[RIGHTFUL] [CATHARSIS]
[RESURRECTION] [REGENERATION]
[NEED] [COST]
Today, the courtroom of doubt opens anew...
The wicked laugh, and the righteous are in tears...
And thus, sin is my only consideration,
in the judgement of bigotry...
If I want to fulfill my innermost desires,
I will keep on swinging this unrighteous flaming sword...
CHAPTER III
THE OUTBREAK OF WAR
a usurper, a traitor...
I was asked to parley with him, I gave him conditions,
and he could have accepted them...
Thus, his arrogance and stubbornness led to the outbreak of war,
and my brother was assassinated...
he lies in state, bereft of life,
in his pavilion.
ANNO 299 AFTER THE CONQUEST.
THE STORMLANDS PLUNGED INTO POLITICAL AND MILITARY DEBACLE:
THE LIFELESS BODY OF KING RENLY BARATHEON,
THE FIRST OF HIS NAME, WAS FOUND DRENCHED IN BLOOD,
MORTALLY WOUNDED, IN HIS PAVILION.
I was asked to confront the weight of my actions...
my whole fleet was burned to ashes...
Yet my beloved daughter Shireen will comfort me
as long as she is with me...
In the ruins of Castle Black, anyone will find
the lonely charred corpses of the parents and their child...
CHAPTER IV:
THE GOD OF THE DECEASED
AND
THE FINAL JUDGEMENT
When I awoke, I was all alone in a dreary place...
the Seventh of Heavens...
whether redemption or damnation, the one who decides is
the Stranger itself... (the God of the Deceased)
Even the most depraved sinners will be saved
if they pay the price...
and that price is not paid in gold,
but in flesh and blood.
I smile, for the first time in decades, to the Stranger,
and then, softly whisper:
"I will never hand over such a price...
never in my afterlife..."
Thus, I suddenly reeled, and lost my footing,
and plunged into the depths of the Seventh of Hells...
And thus, sin is my only consideration,
in the judgement of bigotry...
for I will not let anyone ever...
write the sentence of those sins...
Thus, someday, I will reunite, in my next life, with these hands,
the fragments of depravity...
And thus, the Seventh of Hells will finally turn to
the best of all worlds for my wife, our daughter, and me...
.........................................................................................................
THE BROADSWORD OF REVENGE
O wayward sinner...
Thus, prithee regret all you have done...
NOM DE GUERRE: MAID OF TARTH
AZOR AHAI: THE RIGHTEOUS SAVIOUR
BLUE IS THE COLOUR OF SORROW AND COLDNESS...
KEEP OF CASTLE BLACK
Hear, Lady Stoneheart, know that I am right now
pointing with a sword at a certain person,
who deceived many others...
An ambitious person who thinks only of what's right...
For the sake of this person's ambition,
the one I loved died violently in my arms...
Though I am innocent, I am still accused of it...
yet those who pursue me have not ended my life...
At last the moment of truth and revenge is here...
Regret, regret all you have done!
THE REVENGE OF THE BLUE MAIDEN
NOM DE GUERRE: MAID OF TARTH
Hallo und auf Wiedersehen, Herr Azor Ahai...
I will set fire to your keep... Tell me now what you prefer...
Do I run my cold steel blade across and through your throat,
or let you burn to a crisp within this inferno?
THE REDEMPTION
Hear, Lady Stoneheart, I don't care who's the villain...
I should give him a second chance for atonement, right?
And thus did I say to him:
"Strip yourself of everything you value and prize..."
THAT PRICE IS NOT PAID IN GOLD,
BUT IN FLESH AND BLOOD.
If you confess out loud everything you did "for religion,"
only on that condition will I spare your life...
And thus said he in response:
"Of what I did for the LORD'S sake...
[AZOR AHAI: THE RIGHTEOUS SAVIOUR]
... I will never let go of anything!"
RIGHTFUL KING OF THE LANDS OF WESTEROS
STANNIS BARATHEON
Right, there's nothing left to do, you twat...
In truth, in sooth, regret and repent!
AZOR AHAI: THE RIGHTEOUS SAVIOUR
CHOSEN BY R'HLLOR
JUDGEMENT OF BIGOTRY
JUDGEMENT OF BIGOTRY
Hallo und auf Wiedersehen, Herr Azor Ahai...
The righteous swordsman stifled by his own bigotry...
his body drenched in my wrath and that of other innocents...
Prithee, fall asleep forever...
SHE WAS ACCUSED OF KILLING HER BELOVED
HIS BROTHER HAD GIVEN THE ORDER
SHE DECIDED TO GET REVENGE
MEMORY
Hear, Lady Stoneheart, you are still on your own...
you are still all alone on your own...
SEVEN YEARS AGO
You were separated from both of your daughters,
and you feared that they would forget your face one day...
Do you hear, Lady Stoneheart, it seems that the Lannisters
are no longer here and no longer a threat...
CATELYN'S DAUGHTERS
I am sure that they are somewhere in this wide world...
FIVE YEARS AGO
Those two girls have already vanished, as if into thin air...
Now your daughter am I, only me and me alone...
THEN, THE MAIDEN WENT INSANE
Hear, Your Grace...
[I LEFT IT ALL BEHIND
YOU KNOW, I LEFT IT ALL BEHIND]
...Look at me...
THE LAST BROADSWORD
JUDGEMENT OF BIGOTRY
Simply...
[AZOR AHAI]
...Look at me
STONEHEART
CATELYN
Hallo und auf Wiedersehen, Eure Hoheit...
Leader of fanatics, righteous bigot...
Hear, Lady Stoneheart, why did your husband
trust that person that much?
Now, in sooth, everything has come to an end...
We will put an end to everything...
To this sinful story of evil...
Fare thee well...
(My beloved...)
(The one I hated the most...)
...........................................................................................
CAPRICCIO MUMMERY
The defendant's seat is empty...
The barrister's seat is full of trash...
Thus, let us now begin
this mummery known as
a "trial"...
[Grayscaled Princess]
Following the decrees of the Lord of Light,
one only vessel is now solely missing.
If you happen by chance to know its whereabouts,
please contact the Lady with the Heart of Stone...
[Lady Stoneheart]
Turning back time, changing ever shape and master,
finally, at last, it has appeared upon the stage,
yet, however, I do not know its real whereabouts...
Perchance it may be in the hands of that person...
[Servants]
Seek her, seek her, seek her everywhere,
to the left, to the right, looking up and looking down...
For the one who holds all the Keys,
the Stranger, the Many-Faced God of the Deceased...
[Lightbringer]
For how long will this mummery be carried on?
There is no longer any life beyond it...
[Fallen Queen]
The souls of mortals once fell into the trap...
There is nothing now that can be done or that has not been done...
[Servants]
Swaying scales
in a shattered scenario,
vessels tainted by the sins of yore...
Each one singing a song of one's own,
in a discordant capriccio...
The story has slipped from the hands of the Gods,
and now it unfurls free, with a life of its own...
If those people were still upon this Earth,
they would have been most likely to sigh...
[Lightbringer]
What is really to be dreaded is...
[Grayscaled Princess]
...the desires of mortalkind...
[Grayscaled Princess]:
THE DIRECTOR OF THE THEATRE.
SHE HAS INHERITED HER FATHER'S PLACE.
[Lady Stoneheart]:
SHE LIVES IN THE THEATRE, AND SHE CREATED IT.
REAL NAME: CATELYN STARK, NÉE TULLY.
[Lightbringer]:
AFTER LOSING HIS POWER,
HE BECAME THE SHADOW OF A FLAMING SWORD.
THUS, HE CANNOT ENTER THE THEATRE.
[Fallen Queen]:
ONCE SHE WAS A WISTFUL, NAIVE RED-HAIRED DRESSMAKER.
SHE OFFICIALLY OBEYS LADY STONEHEART,
YET SHE IS WILFUL AND DEVIOUS.
[Grayscaled Princess]
Let us put some order and arrange this information...
Tempted to follow your heart, you thus turned evil...
Now I grant you permission to speak.
Please, give your account of when you entered this theatre...
[Oathbreaker]
The burden of what I have done is a curse upon me,
and, to be freed from said curse, I needed something...
I entered this place because I wanted to find
the missing ancestral sword of my forefathers...
[Servants]
Slaughter him, butcher him, and then devour him!
Smite the intruder with the worst of punishments!
Sentence him, sentence him, sentence him come what may...
Sentence him to torture, to scourge, to death!
[Oathbreaker]
Once I expected the worst, having lost my every hope...
The tall, blue-eyed maiden drew her sword and she fought for me...
[Oathkeeper]
I would not forgive myself if I left you to die...
[Oathbreaker]
And thus, she became the Oathkeeper...
Right-handed Oathkeeper...
Left-handed Oathbreaker...
The replacement vessels have not awakened yet...
Concealing their true intentions within their hearts,
the two unassuming intruders.
Grayscaled Princess, Lady with a Heart of Stone,
Lightbringer, Faithful Servant, God of the Deceased...
When everything comes to a bitter end,
¿who will be the ones to laugh at the end of the day?
[Green Dreamer]:
Lulila, lulila, lulila-lila...
Erratic heartbeats in dreams of things to come...
[Oathbreaker]:
SEEKING THE ANCESTRAL SWORD BRIGHTROAR,
HE ENTERED THE THEATRE.
REAL NAME: JAIME LANNISTER.
[Oathkeeper]:
SHE IS A MAID AT THE THEATRE,
BUT SHE DOES NOT WANT TO CHANGE HER PLACE.
SHE IS THE INCARNATION OF A LOYAL, BRAVE KNIGHT.
[Faithful Servant]:
SHE IS A MAID AT THE THEATRE,
BUT SHE DOES NOT WANT TO CHANGE HER PLACE.
SHE IS A SPIRIT RELEASED FROM HER MIRROR PRISON.
[The God of Many Faces]:
ONE OF THEIR FACES IS THE STRANGER.
STANNIS BARATHEON MET THIS DEITY IN THE AFTERLIFE.
[Green Dreamer]:
HE RESIDES IN THE DREAMLAND OF THE GRAYSCALED PRINCESS.
STILL UNIDENTIFIED.
Friendship, trauma, justice, illusion,
hope, destruction, dreams, lust, love, death...
It all keeps on dissolving, mixing, returning
in an ominous lullaby...
Right before he died, lonely as he was,
he created a theatre...
That "best of all worlds" he desired that much,
will it be fulfilled someday?
Come on, let us play our parts
in this mummery known as
"life..."
Oh, the Green Dreamer is Jojen and the Fallen Queen is Sansa. The Faithful Servant is Cersei. And some more Jaimienne here to contrarrest the Lannincest and Renlienne in previous installments...
Hope you like my Westeros take on the Evillious Chronicles... The Westerious Chronicles!!!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------
SEVEN SINS AND SEVEN PUNISHMENTS
JAIME:
Thus, let us begin!
JOFFREY:
Seven flowers are dancing a quadrille,
sins that have been finally set free...
Covering, concealing their lurid reality...
sinking into pleasure found in others' pain...
WYMAN:
Seven seeds are descending one by one,
they will surely sprout and then grow strong...
Even the whole Known World will be dissolved
in the powerful acids within me...
CERSEI:
Our Reign of Iniquity, founded on golden rocks,
will never crumble, falter, or fall...
The vessels of evil, once released
by cursed siblings who were the children of siblings,
what kind of tale will they make unfurl?
Seven Sins and Seven Punishments...
OBERYN:
Drifting away on seven breezes,
a lethal poison pervades the Known World...
All of the guilty ones are unable to sleep well tonight,
regretting a sin of yore that was not...
PETYR:
On the waters of seven waterfalls,
the reflection is the face of a loved one...
Yet the reflections always differ, and yours is not the only one...
If only they did not exist...
STANNIS:
Within the Lightbringer's throne room under ground,
thus, let us now begin this mummery known as a "trial..."
Everyone seeks to attain
what he or she calls "the best of all possible worlds..."
To which outcome will their desires lead?
Seven Sins and Seven Punishments...
BRIENNE:
Is it the song of the flames I hear? Can I hear it?
No, 'tis the cold steel of vengeance...
The vessels of evil, once released
by cursed siblings who were the children of siblings,
what kind of tale will they make unfurl?
Seven Sins and Seven Punishments...
OMINOUS LULLABY #7
Lulilala, lulila-lara...
Lulilala, lulila-lara...
THE WESTERIOUS CHRONICLES
DISCLAIMER/WARNING: DUE TO THE NATURE OF BOTH CROSSED-OVER UNIVERSES (THE EVILLIOUS CHRONICLES AND THE WORLD OF ICE AND FIRE), THIS SAGA IS DARK AND FULL OF GRAPHIC CONTENT.
READ AT YOUR OWN RISK, IF YOUR COURAGE, YOUR COMMON SENSE, AND/OR YOUR PASSION FOR VOCALOID AND/OR ASOIAF ARE ENOUGH TO DARE. NEVERTHELESS, DISCRETION IS ADVISED.
THE LANNISTERS' CHILD IS AN ONLY CHILD: Backstory set centuries ago on another planet, but in two different dimensions. In one dimension, Jaime Lannister is the only child of the widow Joanna, and he is a tomgirl who likes to crossdress and put on make-up. In another dimension, Cersei Lannister is the only child of the divorcé Tywin, and she is a teen prodigy of science, especially genetics and dimensional research. As young adults, their paths cross quite unexpectedly, leading them both to a planet on a third dimension, on the continent they and their peers, settlers after a great pandemic, will call Westeros... These Lannisters will become the ancestors and the past lives of the Lannister twins born in Westeros centuries later. The maid who became Jaime's fiancée and gave him her uniform is the Lyanna Stark of his universe, while the scientist Cersei's boss (and the villain here) is the Rhaegar Targaryen of her universe.
THE STORY OF WESTEROS: Chrono Story in Westeros, acting as a prelude to both A Sacrifice of Ice and Fire and the Deadly Sins Cycle. The Seven Gods unleash Seven Sins from the late Aegon V and the newborn Rhaegar, and Aerys and Rhaella (wards of the former and parents of the latter), still young and about to become the Mad King and Queen, are caught in the eye of the storm. The role of Elluka is played by a young Rhaegar, ostensibly the narrator of the whole saga from a vantage point in the afterlife.
PROJECT [LYA]: The whole Rhaegar and Lyanna affair had to be woven as well into the Westerious Chronicles, et voilà! A Lyaegar story, yet another one that fits the plot of both 'verses perfectly, that fills yet another hole in the puzzle that is The Westerious Chronicles
A SACRIFICE OF ICE AND FIRE (this one is a whole cycle, aside from not by Akuno-P): Hitobashira Alice / of Sacrifice in Westeros, previous generation: 1) Lyanna 2) Rhaegar 3) Elia 4) Cersei & Jaime... Lyaegar and Lannincest, aside from the Elia backstory...
THE INSANITY OF CROWN PRINCE JOFFREY: eighteenth-century AU, with occult elements. Pretty much complying with Joff's own character arc, but also with traits of Koschei and Bluebeard. And a good dash of gratuitous French ('cuz, eighteenth-century AU). This was the first Deadly Sins mashup out of all of them I made. And it's paved the way for a whole surprising universe...
EVIL EPICUREAN WYMAN MANDERLY: A lurid Westerosi tale no TV series watcher has ever known... The best pork pies north of the Neck... and Freys that keep on disappearing... Oh, and I made Wyman left-handed on Liza's advice (after all, there are very few born lefties in Westeros: Arya in canon [+Lyanna, Stannis, Oberyn in my headcanon] confirmed).
GIFT FROM THE LAVENDER PRINCE: Liza advised me to do it as Oberyn vs. Tywin (we both second the theory)... so this is an Oberyn character study, which makes it truly redoubtable. Valerian is a tranquilizing herb, also known as "busy Lizzie," which I referenced in the original title, before switching to lavender, fitting for a drier and sunnier Mediterranean climate, like that of Dorne, and with the same soothing properties. I use "gift" with a lower-case g first and then "Gift" with an upper-case G (German noun convention) to keep the bilingual pun going on.
THE TAILOR OF GULLTOWN: Petyr, Petyr, pumpkin-eatyr, had a Cat and could not keep her... Basically a Petelyn story, PetyrxSansa at the end, with elements of Sweeney Todd. The inspiration came from "The Tailor Shop of Envizaka" and Middlefinger's own character arc, aside from the musical set in Victorian London.
THE DAUGHTER OF EVIL/THE GUARD OF EVIL: Lannincest version of the Deadly Sins songs most suitable for Lannincest, mashed up. Inspiration from Catherine the Great (whom I say reminds me of Cersei). And a surprising valonqar ending.
THE BROADSWORD OF REVENGE: 'Cuz Brienne deserves her own Deadly Sins mashup about her comeuppance with Stannis. Headcanon in my own mind's eye, starring the Maid of Tarth, and also a switching POV (the other side of the story) for Judgement of Bigotry. Renlienne mentioned in backstory, as well as Stoneheart.
CAPRICCIO MUMMERY: Capriccio Farce, turned Westerosi style... a nice way to wrap things up in my Westerious Chronicles. Oh, and some Jaimienne to make up for the Lannincest and Renlienne in past filks of this saga. Aside from a lot of loose ends being tied up in the afterlife... PS. Shireen's status wound up being a thing I have to shed some light on:
The Director of the Theatre is a very minor side character, in fact an unseen character (never seen or heard, only mentioned by name-title as the one who commissions a certain play script or opera libretto) in Oscar Wilde's tales; they commissions play scripts and opera libretti for the stage (regardless of if the young bohemian students who pen these works freeze to death on cold winter nights, without being able to afford kindling or matches). Even though the character's title in English is epicene, ie gender-neutral, Victorian patriarchy has made translators render the character as always male in target texts (el Director del Teatro, le Directeur du Théâtre, etc.). Still, in English the word "director" is epicene -- so feel free to imagine a female Director of the Theatre (also, in the Hungarian version, the epicenity is retained in the character's name being lifted straight out of the Magyar translation of the Wilde tale: a Színházigazgató).
Shireen apparently uses this ghost character --wealthy, artistically inclined, and above all an epicene (in the source text) unseen character-- as an escapist power fantasy for a doll girl who is a terminally ill only child of a powerful official. She sees all her dolls as the performers (actors, ballerini, musicians) and the playwrights at her command. (Interestingly, the Hungarian character name -a Színházigazgató- also echoes the name of the escapist who incarnates the role in Western name order: "színház", theatre, sounding like "Shireen"; "igazgató", director, sounding like "Baratheon") When she died in the fire along with her parents, she became the Director of the Theatre in her dreams, and treats all the other souls in this stage-themed afterlife she has created as her living doll troupe. Only Stannis and Selyse are barred from entering.
When I say that "she inherited the title of Director of the Theatre" from Stannis, I mean that her illness was the catalyst for her parents doing everything they could, forbidden or not, in order to save her, while she felt powerless and guilty and in need to assert some control herself over others, no matter if these others were people -- and also that this relates to Stannis being absent and "too busy" with his official duties during her childhood, which further catalysed her into a theatre-loving doll girl, who looked up to both of her parents while feeling all those feels. But that is all in the past, especially after death -- and besides, did those two ever know anything in detail about her little shows while locked in her rooms?
SEVEN SINS AND SEVEN PUNISHMENTS: Seven sinners, seven smitings. The Seven Gods channeled by the Seven Sinners discuss the story. This could close the circle... or not?
Promo for "A Sacrifice of Ice and Fire." Interested?
THE LANNISTERS' CHILD IS AN ONLY CHILD:
Mrs. Lannister's son is an only child,
the heir to a great bourgeois family.
A cute, pretty boy admired and envied by all,
however, there is a certain "issue" with him...
He only plays with dolls and plushies all day,
and only likes to wear dresses or skirts.
He often puts on his mother's makeup in secret,
and all the children his age shun him for being a tomgirl.
Thus, he was
always all on his own...
Mr. Lannister's daughter is an only child,
a teen prodigy of those born once in a blue moon.
She entered her local university at thirteen,
and began to investigate the hearts and minds of humans.
War, crime, and genocide never seemed to end,
why did people so often hate and abuse each other?
She carried on with her research for years,
to try to understand evil and pain at least a little.
to try to understand evil and pain at least a little.
Finally, she realised
that the cause of evil and pain´
was not from her world...
Mrs. Lannister's son is an only child,
and finally his mother found him a fiancée.
Though she was a maid who worked in the Lannister's household.
And she was as cute and fair as a porcelain doll.
"May you allow me to wear your uniform?"
That question from her fiancé came as a surprise.
Totally revolted, she only replied:
"Ewww, so disgusting!"
Mr. Lannister's daughter is an only child.
She, too, was posessed by "malice."
For some reason, she has destructive intrusive thoughts.
So she asks her colleagues: "What do you think?"
The leader of the Dimensional Research Team,
her boss, told her what to do:
"If you get rid of your counterpart,
you shall get rid of your 'malice' too."
Across the portal, screams are heard from the nursery,
he finds himself in shock, huddled in a corner.
The gutted "doll" (his fiancée), with her entrails taken out,
feels warm and cozy, with all her limbs broken.
Through his eyes, he could see
the other world, across the looking-glass portal.
The girl who looked like him in a labcoat,
stretched out her hand to him...
When both worlds were consumed by "malice,"
the ARK left that galaxy.
There were 72 people on board.
They say that included a set of fraternal twins.
As she was about to kill her counterpart,
she realised the truth about everything.
She found out that this quest was
a trap her boss set for her and her counterpart.
The moment she would have killed her counterpart,
she would surrender unconditionally to malice.
"Maybe he (the boss) wanted to take her place,
usurp her place on the ark because she had been infected."
The Lannisters' children are only children,
yet still, there are two of them.
An older sister who knows a lot about the human spirit,
and a younger brother who knows a lot about the human body.
The ARK courses through the dark ocean of space,
seeking a new paradise to live in.
Surely, the research of both siblings
will one day resurrect the human race...
AERYS:
Is it the song of nightingales I hear? Can you hear it?
RHAELLA:
No, 'tis the despaired cry of the court.
AERYS:
Is it the light of the full moon I see? Can you see it?
RHAELLA:
No, 'tis the lurid glow of the flames.
The person we once called our guardian...
AERYS:
...is burning to a crisp within the keep we have left.
Leaving behind the original sin
that the gods broke into seven parts...
RHAELLA:
Lust is a flower...
AERYS:
...gluttony is a seed...
RHAELLA:
...pride is a jewel...
AERYS:
...jealousy is a waterfall...
RHAELLA:
...weariness is a breeze...
AERYS:
...bigotry is the ground...
RHAELLA+AERYS:
And lastly, wrath is a keep on fire...
Arise, arise, O Seven Sins,
filthy offshoots of our bloodline's inbreeding...
Turn around, on and on, on and on,
Prithee purify these Seven Sins...
please, if that could be...
RHAEGAR:
Countless brother-husbands taking sister-wives
scattered the Seven Sins abroad across this world...
The Seven Gods, watching over Summerhall,
blessed the newborn prince entrusted to seek them...
"No matter how much I may sacrifice,
I will always be there to fulfil it, even in the afterlife..."
After falling recklessly in love
and losing everything that he prized, even his own life...
The afterlife he led in the Stranger's Heaven brought
unto him nought but unsubstantial emptiness...
The one who had it all and who lost it all...
Which destiny awaits? What does he wish for?
Until the end of times...
Wrought by and brought upon
a single bloodline,
broken into seven pieces:
this is the story of sin...
The wistful romance
of the poet prince born in the flames,
where it all began, at Summerhall...
this is the Story of Westeros...
Lulila, lulila, lulila, lulila...
Lulila, lulila, lulila, lulila...
Lulila, lulila, lulila, lulila...
Lulila, lulila, lulila, lulila...
...................................................................................................
PROJECT [LYA]
-Lyanna's Project-
This is the story of how it all began...
From when shall I begin to tell my tale?
Shall I tell you anything I know?
My name is Lyanna Stark,
a maiden unlike any other.
My beloved's name is Rhaegar,
the learned future king of all the lands...
He kissed me and he softly, lovingly told me:
"You will become the mother of the Prince that was Promised...
Queen of Love and Beauty..."
RHAEGAR TARGARYEN HAD RECENTLY BECOME OBSESSED
WITH A CERTAIN CHAOTIC PROPHECY:
THE RETURN OF THE DARK FORCES
THAT ONCE HAUNTED THE WORLD DURING THE LONG NIGHT.
TO AVOID THE CATACLYSM,
CONVINCED THAT THE FATE OF EVERYONE RESTED ON HIS SHOULDERS,
HE ARRANGED A TOURNEY AT HARRENHAL...
Winter is Coming, a new Long Night approaches:
thus say our house words and the prophecy.
Only one will deliver us from the darkness,
and his will be the Song of Ice and Fire...
The Prince that was Promised must see the light of day...
A tourney was held at Harrenhal:
the potential mother was being searched for...
Seek the most unlikely maiden of them all...
The chosen one will be crowned Queen of Love and Beauty,
and she will bring a deliverer to light...
I don't understand the reason why I was the one chosen...
He said that he loved me, and clasped me in his slender arms...
After everything is done, let's elope, like star-crossed lovers,
to the Tower of Joy in Dorne; just the two of us.
The dragon seed has been sown within me at last...
I await the birth of the Prince that was Promised...
THE PROJECT REQUIRED AN UNUSUAL MAIDEN
TO BRING THE PRINCE THAT WAS PROMISED TO THE LIGHT.
ELIA NYMEROS MARTELL OF DORNE, RHAEGAR'S CONSORT,
WAS, HOWEVER, NOT STRONG OF HEALTH ENOUGH.
FORTUNATELY, LYANNA, THE BRIDE OF LORD ROBERT BARATHEON,
WAS THE ONE WHO FIT ALL THE REQUIREMENTS.
-Rhaegar's Project-
This is the story of how it all began...
From when shall I begin to tell my tale?
Shall I tell you everything I know?
My name is Rhaegar Targaryen,
the learned future king of all the lands.
Unfortunately, I bring the worst of news:
the project was an utter failure.
My wife Elia is too weak to bear more children...
All of my ambitions and dreams have disappeared...
AFTER HAVING BROUGHT TWO CHILDREN,
RHAENYS AND AEGON, TO THE WORLD,
ELIA HAD WEAKENED NOT TO BEAR ANY MORE CHILDREN.
The Tourney of Harrenhal is a Seven-sent chance for me:
thanks to its consequences, I will rule this vast realm.
The Starks and the Baratheons say I wrested the bride from them...
Now it's the time to defend my rights...
The tourney began,
the crowned one was the daughter of Winterfell...
Temptation approached; we became lovers.
"This crown of winter roses will make things easier..."
Without thinking twice, I placed it on her dark locks.
My dear Lyanna, forgive me for having ruined your life...
Because of our love for each other, a war broke out...
But, as I had intended to, we lived together...
And then, I realized that I really love you.
After everything is done, let's elope, like star-crossed lovers,
to the Tower of Joy in Dorne; just the two of us.
RHAEGAR:
I love you...
LYANNA:
And I love you...
The evening stars were corrupted...
The moon and the stars in the southern sky
disappeared...
FOLLOWING THE TOURNEY OF HARRENHAL,
LYANNA AND RHAEGAR ELOPED TO THE TOWER OF JOY,
IN THE DORNISH MARCHES, WHERE THEY LIVED TOGETHER.
MARCHING TOWARDS KING'S LANDING,
A REBEL ARMY AGAINST THE CROWN
WAS SPEARHEADED BY STORMLORD ROBERT BARATHEON,
THE FIANCÉ OF LYANNA STARK.
-Robert's Project-
This is the story of how it all began...
From when shall I begin to tell my tale?
Shall I tell you all I know?
My name is Robert Baratheon,
eldest of three orphan brothers, Lord of the Stormlands.
Rhaegar and Lyanna were those I pursued,
Lyanna and Rhaegar were both of them gone.
I seek the Queen of Love and Beauty, my bride, wherever she is,
and the Crown Prince, for having taken her away...
ROBERT AND RHAEGAR FACED ONE ANOTHER
AT THE DECISIVE BATTLE OF THE TRIDENT:
THE CONFRONTATION THAT SHAPED THE HISTORY OF WESTEROS...
..................................................................................................
Once upon a time, in a certain place, there was a little dream.
No one knew who had dreamt that dream, and no one cared at all.
This made the little dream think:
I do not want to disappear. How can I make people dream of me?
And thus, the dream thought and thought, and at last had an idea:
"I will make people come to me, leading them astray,
and let them create worlds of their own..."
A SACRIFICE OF ICE AND FIRE
Story the First: The Lost Swordswoman
The first Alice was a maiden righteous, bold, and free,
clasping in her left hand the hilt of a trusty sword.
She cut down the unfair and set right everything gone wrong,
wayward was her scarlet path, far from wedding a lord.
This Alice got lost somewhere far away,
disappeared, a fallen woman, into sin thus lead astray...
They found her bereft of life, within the Tower of Joy...
She lay in blood and wilted roses, with her newborn boy.
The second Alice was a clever prince, so frail and shy,
strumming the strings of his heart and harp to many a song...
Singing and imagining that prophecies were true,
he created an insane world where nothing was wrong.
This Alice loved and picked a winter rose so blue...
he was slain by the stormlord for having made his bride untrue...
Crushed his breastplate and his chest, the lungs and heart within...
Once beloved, now he's hated, due to his last sin.
Story the Third: The Broken Princess
The third Alice was sweet, with skin warm and dark as gold,
the friendliest, loveliest one born on the coast of Dorne...
She wedded the poet prince and dwelled within his court,
giving him two children; when he left, she felt no scorn.
This Alice was the princess of all the land...
She suffered a gruesome fate at a traitor's harsh command...
As she struggles for her life, she sees her children die...
then, her maidenhead once lost, she yields with one last sigh.
Story the Fourth: The Wilful Twins
Following the woodland paths no one's trod before...
Crossing at the ford that still runs scarlet with gore...
Though you have been invited to the Royal Keep...
In my heart you will always dwell...
The fourth Alice were twins with green eyes and golden hair,
so wilful and curious, like any other child...
crossing many thresholds as their lives go on and on...
yet now they're no children and life is no longer mild.
The older sister's headstrong... and...
the younger brother's insecure...
They think they are the closest to their wonderland, for sure...
From their wildest dreaming they will never, e'er awake,
trapped forever in the lives they lead for their hearts' sake...
Who will be the next Alice?
...................................................................................................
THE INSANITY OF CROWN PRINCE JOFFREY
Thus... Allons donc danser!
JOFFREY:
Once more, a beautiful girl
throws herself at my feet before me...
What a sincere smile is hers...
she will doubtless become my next mistress...
Consecrated as an infant to the Maiden,
the Goddess of Love blessed me with the power that
every girl or lady who looks into these cold, green eyes
will fall as if transfixed right before me...
SHAE:
With the power to conquer every reluctant heart...
(Le pouvoir de prendre tous les coeurs qu'il veut...)
ROS:
The lonely young man, into his boudoir at the royal palace...
(L'héritier aux cheveux d'or, seul dans son magnifique boudoir...)
SHAE:
...takes up, one by one, every female that he is pleased with...
(...il emporte, l'une après l'autre, toutes les dames qu'il trouve remarquables...)
ROS:
...gathering them all for his collection...
(...il a la passion de les collectionner...)
JOFFREY:
Like the taste of poison concealed in the most intense liqueur,
like the pleasure of cold steel plunged into the silk of their skin,
blood, sweat, tears, and strychnine that combine into
that alluring purple liquid, so cool yet so warm...
Une fois déshabillée, on ne peut pas retourner dans la réalité!
CATALOGUE OF MISSING PERSONS IN THE KINGDOMS OF WESTEROS
Shae of Lorath, 20-21, of King's Landing, sutler whore
Ros, 18-19, of Winterfell, whore
Ellaria Sand, 30-31, of Sunspear, paramour
Obara Sand, 20, of the Water Gardens, spearwoman
Nymeria Sand, 18, of the Water Gardens, kunoichi
Tyene Sand, 16, of the Reach, septa
Sansa Stark, 16, of Winterfell, noblewoman/dressmaker
JOFFREY:
My portraits of yore burned to a crisp,
the busts of me shattered,
I killed my past self...
I want to forget my lovely face,
for which my stepfather made me feel such pain...
(Maudits mes parents, mes yeux, mes cheveux...)
I clasp the lovely maiden and steal a kiss from her lips...
(Elle résiste, mais je l'embrasse encore...)
Once she was my first fiancée, of our childhood days,
the frightened one who shied away from me....
(Oh, Sansa! Ne me quittez pas encore!
Je veux être aimé de toi!)
SANSA:
Since a certain day, ladies across the vast realm...
(les plus belles dames de tout le vaste royaume...)
ELLARIA:
...vanished, one by one, into thin air without forewarning...
(...disparues sans aucune trace...)
SANSA:
They were mothers, daughters, aunts, sisters, friends, brides, wives...
(Il avait beaucoup de familles plongées dans le désespoir...)
ELLARIA:
Their loved ones knew not what to do...
(Étaient-elles condamnées par toujours?)
JOFFREY:
The intense hue of ecstasy in the darkness of midnight,
passion beyond limits, utterly unrestrained...
illusions so true to life that they are taken for reality...
I am no longer a person at all...
(Qu'est-ce que je suis?)
Indulging in depravity, to defy the Seven Gods,
this is the soirée of insanity for which I desire...
(c'est la nuit de la décadence et de la démence...)
CATALOGUE OF MISSING PERSONS IN THE KINGDOMS OF WESTEROS (continued)
Taena Merryweather, 30, of the Reach, noblewoman
Léonnette Fossoway, 24-25, of the Reach, noblewoman
Elinor Tyrell, 17, of Highgarden, noblewoman
Megga Tyrell, 17, of Highgarden, noblewoman
Alla Tyrell, 16, of Highgarden, noblewoman
Mya Stone, 24-25, of the Vale of Arryn, sherpa
Brienne of Tarth, 19, of Tarth, knight
Meera Reed, 18, of the Neck, crannogmaiden
In the meantime... a beautiful girl has a conversation with a wistful Dornishman...
OBERYN (giving her a necklace with purple crystal pendants): The pay you give me is not bad for a Tyrell of Highgarden... well, a common enemy is a rightful reason for our lands to ally. After all, my paramour and daughters are held captive there as well...
The maiden, twinkles in her clever eyes, puts on the necklace as the Dornishman takes the silk sachet from her...
Later on, that self-same maiden enters the ballroom at the royal court, confidently, curtsying and smiling warmly...
JOFFREY:
Once more, a new beautiful lady,
(...celle-ci est intelligente aussi... quelle découverte!)
She answers to my every beck and call,
and she is as pleased with me as I am with her...
Viens, Margaery, ma chêre, danser dans le boudoir...
She played so wistfully with the triggers of my firearms...!
After we embrace and kiss so intensely,
voulez-vous être mon échansonne?
She pours our best liquor into the sparkling glass cups,
wish to each other's health, a twinkle and a clink,
a draught of crystal fire searing my throat...
Suddenly, I feel a sharp pain in my chest,
my lips are locked, I cannot breathe...
SANSA:
A maiden of unusual cleverness, whose best friend had disappeared...
(Elles étaient presque soeurs, très prochaines l'une de l'autre...)
MARGAERY:
...traced her steps towards the ostentatious halls of the evil one...
(...bien sûr, l'amie égarée sarait prisonnière là...)
SANSA:
She put on her best and shone with wit, thus the evil one was soon cajoled...
(...déçu d'une flatteuse qu'il croyait sincère...)
MARGAERY:
...and she put a purple crystal, which quickly dissolved, into his cup...
(...et, à la santé d'elle, il avala sa mort avec la liqueur...)
JOFFREY:
Cold sweat coursing through my veins, with the poison I had drunk unaware,
I stagger, half-conscious, and fall backwards on the cold, hard pavement.
Tainted blood depriving me of air, racking me with searing pain,
as my lips and fingertips are slowly dyed purple...
As I lie tossing and writhing feverishly on the cold pavement,
all the ladies I have collected awaken and flee the boudoir,
The last one to leave looks over her shoulder into my blood-shot veiled eyes...
for an instant... as I struggle to recognize her features...
It was my childhood friend... Sansa! Wait!
Sansa! Wait!
Je ne t'ai pas dit que je t'aime...
(and I cannot, it is too late...)
..............................................................................................
EVIL EPICUREAN WYMAN MANDERLY
Thus, make sure you leave nothing left on your platter.
In the grand banquet hall of a North-born Reacher,
the feast that begins anew is yet another last supper.
The dishes served would make any other person wince,
yet the hefty master devours them with a smile...
The name of this lord is Wyman Manderly,
and he used to be served the finest rarities north of the Neck...
Yet, at the end, what he ended up desiring was
the most gruesome ingredient upon this world...
Bend the knee and pay your respects
to our liege, Lord Wyman Manderly!
All the ingredients that exist
rightfully belong to His Lordship!
Devour everything on the golden platters!
There is always room for more!
Even the maybe lethally poisonous blue glaze
is nothing but the crowning spice on the main course!!
Suck the hollow bones empty, and then, devour them!!
If you're not satisfied, why not taste the platters?
This evening's supper, this orgy quaffed thus heartily,
is still rather far from being over...
Freshly-Gathered Weirwood Syrup
Cold Fruit Soup with Candied Winter Rose and Reach Rose Petals
Assorted Mushrooms of the Northern Woods
Reach-Style Mince Pies Made with our Greenhouse Fruits
Spicy Honeycakes with Arbour Raisins and Sugarspun Lace
Fresh Greenhouse Fruits Out of their Season and Climate
Arbour Rosé Laced with Shade of the Evening
Sunflower and Pumpkin Flower Salad
Rosehip Soup, Highgarden Style
Frey-Style Riverlands Carpaccio
Our Famous Reach-Style Pork Pie
Our Famous Reach-Style Black Pudding
Reach-Style Lemoncakes and Berrycakes with Sugarspun Roses
Arbour Gold Laced with Lysene Brandy
The newly-arrived Riverlands kitchen-maid, a born Frey,
said in a low voice, in a whisper rather soft and shy...
"I desire to be discharged from your service, Your Lordship..."
Hmph! Such backstabbing upstart traitors!
Bend the knee and pay your respects
to our liege, Lord Wyman Manderly!
Anyone who betrays his trust
will have to pay the heaviest of prices!
Today's feast will be unlike any other!!
With auburn hair shining with a reddish tinge,
this one sure goes down smoothly indeed...
Let Arbour gold flow to wash down our rarities!
If you are not satisfied, feel free to ask for seconds!!
Hey, you, little cupbearer over there...!
I wonder what you taste like...
Today's Supper
Sunflower and Riverlands Clover Salad
Rosehip Soup, The Crossing Style
(***Due to certain circumstances, this course has been censored***)
Our Famous Reach-Style Pork Pie
Our Famous Reach-Style Black Pudding (Is that human blood?)
Spicy Honeycakes with Arbour Raisins and Sugarspun Lace
Reach-Style Lemoncakes and Berrycakes with Sugarspun Roses
Arbour Gold Laced with Lysene Brandy
After Supper
(***Due to certain circumstances, this course has been censored***)
(***Due to certain circumstances, this course has been censored***)
(***Due to certain circumstances, this course has been censored***)
(***Due to certain circumstances, this course has been censored***)
(***Due to certain circumstances, this course has been censored***)
(***Due to certain circumstances, this course has been censored***)
(***Due to certain circumstances, this course has been censored***)
As the days went by, the keep gradually became empty...
There is nothing and no one left but His Lordship within...
Even then, he keeps on seeking more of his drug,
the most gruesome ingredient upon this world...
"If I leave any leftovers, they will smite me..."
Devour everything that you may be pleased with!
Suddenly, he caught sight of his own right hand...
And, quietly, affably, he smiled and he said to himself:
"There is something I have never tasted before..."
The lurid last supper of Lord Wyman
consisted of no other ingredient but himself...
Now he knows every flavour in the Known World,
but no one will ever know what he tasted like...
The cupbearer and the kitchen maid are both Frey prisoners of war and my own OC:s. I felt that I had to make that explanation for you, dear readers. The story of the Frey pies is one of the most lurid subplots kept out of the TV series, and there is still speculation around it...
..............................................................................................
GIFT FROM THE LAVENDER PRINCE
gift (English)
noun
1. a present
2. a talent
3. something cheap, an easy task
Thus, 'tis time for you to get some rest...
Please, calm down with this gift of mine...
You can rest assured and soothed with this gift of mine...
Yes, I am the Lavender Prince who brings repose...
only so that you can be happy at last...
King's Landing, anno 300 after the Conquest
Even though hers was a marriage of state,
even though he left her, Elia still loved Rhaegar...
You're a straitlaced statesman, only caring for your position...
while I have still thought of my loved ones for decades...
You were after the lives of the princess and her children,
fearing that their descendants might take your place...
You've forgotten the price that you and I had to pay...
And that is fine as well, until the past resurfaces...
I can bear no longer to see you weary every day,
worn out by old age and by the pressure of statescraft...
so let me give you this good remedy...
It will soothe you and heal your weariness from within...
Take it as a present from me...
Please, calm down with this gift of mine...
You can rest assured and soothed with this gift of mine...
Yes, I am the Lavender Prince who brings repose...
only so that you can be happy at last...
UPON LEARNING THAT LORD TYWIN LANNISTER
HAD HAD HIS SISTER AND NEPHEWS KILLED,
HE FINALLY FELT THE WEIGHT OF HARSH REALITY.
AND THUS, DURING HIS WAYWARD LOST YEARS,
OBERYN LEARNED (AMONG MANY OTHER RECIPES)
HOW TO DISTILL A SOOTHING "GIFT" OF REPOSE.
THIS "GIFT" HE WOULD LATER GIVE TO TYWIN LANNISTER,
CLAIMING THAT IT WAS A POWERFUL TRANQUILIZING DRUG.
Everyone has got one or another kind of concerns.
Including my brother, my paramour, and all of my daughters.
For the sake of everyone I love who cannot sleep at night,
I shall make more tranquilizer as a gift for you...
As soon as you plunge into your dreamland,
you will forget harsh reality and all intrusive thoughts...
Lying in bed, as innocently as a child,
close your eyes, and let go of everything...
LORD TYWIN LANNISTER, IN CRITICAL CONDITION.
DORNISH VISITORS TAKE KING'S LANDING BY STORM.
THE RED KEEP PLUNGED INTO PANIC BY LORD LANNISTER'S CONDITION.
IS DORAN NYMEROS MARTELL BEHIND THE SCENES?
THE CAPITAL IS CUT OFF FROM THE REST OF WESTEROS.
HOUSE LANNISTER ALREADY IN A STATE OF DECADENCE.
gift (English)
noun
1. a present
2. a talent
3. something cheap, an easy task
Gift (German)
noun (neuter)
1. poison, venom, toxic substance
After you have drunk my gift for so many days,
Your Lordship, you will live without a worry or a care...
I myself, "by no means weary", will, in exchange,
noun
1. a present
2. a talent
3. something cheap, an easy task
Gift (German)
noun (neuter)
1. poison, venom, toxic substance
After you have drunk my gift for so many days,
Your Lordship, you will live without a worry or a care...
I myself, "by no means weary", will, in exchange,
have finally obtained freedom from this pain that weighs me down...
Please, calm down with this Gift of mine...
You can rest assured and soothed with this Gift of mine...
Yes, I am the Lavender Prince who brings repose...
lonely and empty, seeking the hope I once lost...
You can rest assured and soothed with this Gift of mine...
Yes, I am the Lavender Prince who brings repose...
lonely and empty, seeking the hope I once lost...
In those days when I was trying to forget
my sister and her children, shattered like porcelain dolls...
I, for decades, was already broken as well...
thus, I seek to punish those who took their lives...
This is a very powerful drug:
the effect will stay within you forever and ever...
Now it is finally my time to take some rest...
I will change into the lover of the Dornishman's Wife at last...
OBERYN WAS SLAIN IN A TRIAL BY COMBAT
AGAINST LANNISTER CHAMPION SER GREGOR CLEGANE.
DAYS AFTERWARDS, LORD LANNISTER WAS FOUND DEAD IN THE PRIVY.
HIS LIFELESS FORM HAD ALREADY BEGUN TO DECAY.
WAS IT BECAUSE OF HIS STATE OF HEALTH,
OR BECAUSE HE HAD TRUSTED THAT PERSON?
AFTER OBERYN FOUGHT THAT LAST COMBAT,
HE TOOK THE TRUTH WITH HIM INTO ETERNAL DARKNESS...
Oh, and Liza advised me to do the Gift song with Oberyn and Tywin (to get even more Dornishness in here and introduce the Elia issue). I use "gift" with a lower-case g first and then "Gift" with an upper-case G (German noun convention) to keep the bilingual pun going on.
Oh, and Liza advised me to do the Gift song with Oberyn and Tywin (to get even more Dornishness in here and introduce the Elia issue). I use "gift" with a lower-case g first and then "Gift" with an upper-case G (German noun convention) to keep the bilingual pun going on.
THE TAILOR OF GULLTOWN
Thus, let's pin those sleeves...
On a quaint street in Gulltown, in the Vale of Arryn,
there lives a young man who runs a tailor's shop.
Having made himself, risen from obscurity,
now he makes clothes for wealthy townsfolk and for nobles...
However, there is a thought constantly on his mind:
the person he once admired as a child and whom he still loves...
"Even though I have made myself, though I am within your reach...
you never stay for long time under my scissors sign..."
But I have commissions, I've got to concentrate...
clutching my scissors in my right hand...
the scissors Mother once used for her needlework...
The sharper they are, the better they cut...
Catelyn... I am honoured to make your dresses and your accessories...
but can there be something more between us?
Today, like every day, there's nothing new under the sun...
when I went shopping, our eyes met on the marketplace...
There she was, Cat, with that bright auburn hair and those warm blue eyes...
But who was the gentleman who held her hand by her side?
That grey overcoat fits his serious frame like a glove,
and she appears to be very close to the stern gentleman...
I could not stand the sight any longer,
so off I dashed back into the shop...
But I've got work to do, I've got to concentrate...
clutching my scissors in my right hand...
Teardrops trickle down my cheeks and into my goatee
as I tweak the overcoat pinned down on the table, right before me...
There's an eerie athmosphere out on the streets,
as if a murder had taken place.
I saw Cat today once more, half-way crossing the bridge,
but who was the young man walking by her side?
She has a mournful countenance, there is sorrow in her eyes...
the dashing young gentleman dries up her tears by her side...
That cravat, embroidered with silver thread, fits him like a glove...
Ah... So this is the type of lover you prefer?
But I've got work to do, I've got to concentrate...
clutching my scissors in my right hand...
With blood-shot eyes, swollen and ablaze,
I tweak the cravat pinned down on the table, right before me...
There's a rumour spreading throughout the streets lately:
it seems that two murders have taken place in a row.
I saw her peering through the window-panes of my shop,
but who was the young boy who had come with her?
For such a stripling, who has not yet reached his sixteenth year,
she bought from me a smart grey checkered newsy cap.
What the seven hells do you think you are doing?
Seriously, Catelyn Tully, you know no limits!But I've got work to do, I've got to concentrate...
clutching my scissors in my right hand...
How strange... have the scissors' blades always been scarlet?
Today, I will do my best with this cap as well...
At last, I am ready, I have finished.
If you are not the one who is going to come to me...
I will be the one who will come to you.
"The two blades of a pair of scissors work together by crossing each other.
Just like any decent husband and wife couple should do.
At least, that's what Mother used to say..."
In this smart grey overcoat,
this cravat embroidered with silver thread,
and this checkered newsy cap,
which I put on my head...
I have become
your kind of lover...
Now, Cat, what do you say?
Am I not dashing?
Today, nothing is the same at all.
The victim this time, the fourth one, was female:
The wife and mother of the Stark family...
like her spouse and sons, she appears to have been murdered.
On the other hand, she had been quite cruel.
"Good morning, pleased to meet you", she said.
As if I had perchance been a stranger to her,
as if I had perchance been a stranger to her...
But I've got work to do, I've got to concentrate...
clutching my scissors in my right hand...
the scissors for needlework which have been dyed crimson...
The sharper they are, the better they cut...
But we've got work to do, we've got to concentrate...
clutching my scissors in my right hand...
with the orphan girl I call my niece for an apprentice,
since I lost the mother, but the daughter is at least mine...
Sansa... we will have to leave this place for safety's sake,
and set shop elsewhere.
Like in King's Landing, the capital.
You've always wanted to live there, right, darling?
Well, we're setting sail tomorrow, lock, stock, and barrel.
I know you cannot say no...
Explanation: The three male murder victims are, in this order: Ned (coat), Robb (cravat), and Bran (cap). This was the second Westerious bunny I had, just to see Petyr as the killer in this song fit perfectly, like Joff in Venomania.
...............................................................................................
THE DAUGHTER OF EVIL/THE GUARD OF EVIL
CERSEI:
Thus, everyone bend the knee!
Once upon a time, somewhere in this world
there was a great kingdom with a decadent court,
and, high above them all, upon a throne of swords,
sat the young queen, aged just twenty-four.
She lived in a huge red castle outside the capital,
the commander of her guards looked quite similar to her,
her loutish husband had been "killed in an accident..."
her eldest son and heir was called Joffrey...
What more could she wish for?
If the realm treasury chanced to be out of funds,
there would always be the riffraff to oppress for more...
as for anyone who contradicted her commands...
they would only forfeit with their lives!
(Eddard Stark led to the scaffold, Arya watching)
CERSEI:
Thus, everyone bend the knee!
Scarlet and golden flower of evil, blooming feverishly, vividly,
all the puny weeds around will be absorbed into it...
JAIME:
You are my liege lady, I'm your faithful knight,
we are lovely twin siblings torn apart by chance...
If it is to protect you, I will break any oath,
I will betray myself, sacrifice the one I am...
We were born to much rejoicing, with great expectations,
blessed by pealing sept bells we were given our names...
However, selfish adults, to further their own ends,
split our future in twain and rent the tie that binds us...
Even if the whole world became your enemy,
I will stay true to you and protect you from harm...
so please rest assured, what are brothers and kingsguards for?
You are my liege lady, I'm your faithful knight,
we are pitiful twin siblings torn apart by chance...
If it is to protect you, I will break any oath,
I will betray myself, sacrifice the one I am...
The selfish queen fell madly in love with a young man
from the ruling household of the land of flowers,
but, however, his heart belonged to another:
the dashing lord of the stormy lands...
JAIME:
During a tourney, I first met the Lord of Storm's End,
then but a raven-haired stripling, but still a charming one...
so cheerful and kindly, with such a smile on his face...
I must say the truth: that I took a shine to him...
Intoxicated with jealousy, Her Grace
called for her lord father and her other advisors,
and, during the council, she coldly told them:
"War shall be declared on the Stormlands..."
JAIME:
But Her Grace's command, issued straight by herself,
is that Lord Renly shall be put to death...
I must lead her armies upon the battlefield,
since her wish is my command,
but why are my cheeks always wet with tears?
Countless villages were overrun,
and countless lives were lost in the fray...
So many common people suffering due to the war...
Their sorrow could not reach the detached queen...
CERSEI:
Ah, it's time for a drink and cake!
Scarlet and golden flower of evil, blooming beautifully,
though in a deranged manner,
and intrenched in so many thorns that it cannot be touched.
JAIME:
You are my liege lady, I'm your faithful knight,
we are deranged twin siblings torn apart by chance...
Today, there are lemoncakes washed down with Dornish red...
In response, you smile as innocently as always...
Agreeing that the wicked queen should be brought down,
finally the common people had to take to arms.
And spearheading the realmwide uprising was
a Faceless Swordswoman, an assassin deadly and swift...
All of the grudges that the smallfolk had pent up
finally led to riots, from Dorne to the Night's Watch...
Worn out by the Stormlands campaign, and by this conflict,
the queen's men soon turned cloak to the insurgents' side.
JAIME:
Before long, our regime will surely be destroyed
by the wrath of our angered subjects...
If they say that we rightly deserve this...
though it would be fitting retaliation for the Targaryens...
I will still oppose it.
In the end, the Red Keep itself wound up under siege,
its weary garrison had to hoist the white flag,
and the lovely young queen, whose star had begun to fade,
feared she'd share the fate of her kin's foes...
CERSEI:
I still remember Elia and her children... No! We shall never share their fate!
Scarlet and golden flower of evil, blooming sorrowfully...
as the paradise that had been made for her sake
is quickly becoming an inferno...
JAIME:
Let me put my left hand around your silky white throat...
I will set sail with the children, trust me, they will be safe.
It's all right, we're twins, and you are the eldest one...
Didn't the foretelling say your little brother would strangle you?
(click of a closing trachea)
You are a dying sinner, I am a fugitive,
we are saddened twin siblings torn apart by chance...
If you go down in history as a villainess,
then, I have the same blood flowing through my veins...
Once upon a time, somewhere in this world
there was a great kingdom with a decadent court,
and, high above them all, upon a throne of swords,
sat Her Grace, my adorable older sister.
Even if the whole world became your enemy,
(CERSEI: At last my time has come...)
I will stay true to you and protect you from harm...
(CERSEI: As the sept bells signal the end of my life...)
so please rest assured, what are brothers and kingsguards for?
(CERSEI: I do not dare to look at the crowd storming in)
There you are, sitting on the throne, with a dark collar, smiling...
JAIME:
You are my liege lady, I'm your faithful knight,
we are pitiful twin siblings torn apart by chance...
If it is to protect you, I will break any oath,
I will betray myself, sacrifice the one I am...
JAIME+CERSEI:
If I ever were to be reborn...
I would like to be with you once again...
Annotations: The swordswoman leading the uprising is Arya. But she is still leading the vanguard of the upcoming Targ invasion... and the poem references the "valonqar prophecy" that Cersei would be strangled by her little brother...
This was the third bunny I had in the Westerious saga, with Lannincest since Rin's and Len's characters in the Tale of Evil are so reminiscent of Cersei and Jaime (respectively) that there was another story that could be given a Westeros shot...
........................................................................................................
JUDGEMENT OF BIGOTRY
IN THE KINGDOMS OF WESTEROS, THERE ONCE WAS A MAN OF RANK WHO USED HIS RELIGIOUS CONVICTION AS FOUNDATION FOR HIS OWN PERSONAL GOALS.
HIS NAME WAS STANNIS BARATHEON, BUT HE WOULD BE KNOWN AS "AZOR AHAI" TO THOSE WHO FOLLOWED HIS CREED AND BANNER...
Thus, now it's time for the judgement.
CHAPTER I
THE BIGOT AND THE RELIGIOUS EXCUSE FOR WARFARE
Everyone is either good through and through
or utterly evil...
[Law] [Justice]
[Litigation] [Judgement]
[Plaintiff] [Defendant]
[Innocent] [Guilty]I am the Saviour,
I love righteousness more than anything else...
[Hearing] [Witness]
[Indictment] [Dismissal]
[Cross-Examination] [Defense]
[Prosecution] [Summons]
Even the most sinful can be redeemed
if they pay the price...
and that price is not paid in gold,
but in flesh and blood.
Rank, age, gender, descent...
all of that is irrelevant.
[Sinners] [Heretics]
[Deception] [Repression]
[Deceit] [Power]
[Decadence] [Usurpers]
What matters is if you have done right or wrong:
that is everything...
[Right] [Right]
[Right] [Right]
[Right] [Right]
[Right] [Right]
Your lives depend on me...
If you wish for salvation, let me see what you have done!
And thus, sin is my only consideration,
in the judgement of bigotry...
If you wish to leave the cold mire of damnation,
give me the reasons why to be redeemed or not...
CHAPTER II
THE DAUGHTER IN THE DREARY FORTRESS
AND
THE SAVIOUR REBORN
Even for my daughter, with her face covered in gray scales,
I need to be stainless (sinless)...
[TERMINAL ILLNESS] [FAMILY]
[CONCERN] [DAMNATION]
[MIRACLES] [HOPE]
[RED LADY] [FRIENDSHIP]
If I purge this world of sinners, of depravity,
my wishes will come true...
[CONVERT] [LORD OF LIGHT]
[RIGHTFUL] [CATHARSIS]
[RESURRECTION] [REGENERATION]
[NEED] [COST]
Today, the courtroom of doubt opens anew...
The wicked laugh, and the righteous are in tears...
And thus, sin is my only consideration,
in the judgement of bigotry...
If I want to fulfill my innermost desires,
I will keep on swinging this unrighteous flaming sword...
CHAPTER III
THE OUTBREAK OF WAR
AND
THE END OF THE DEATH SENTENCE
My conceited younger brother, turned the leader of an army,a usurper, a traitor...
I was asked to parley with him, I gave him conditions,
and he could have accepted them...
Thus, his arrogance and stubbornness led to the outbreak of war,
and my brother was assassinated...
he lies in state, bereft of life,
in his pavilion.
ANNO 299 AFTER THE CONQUEST.
THE STORMLANDS PLUNGED INTO POLITICAL AND MILITARY DEBACLE:
THE LIFELESS BODY OF KING RENLY BARATHEON,
THE FIRST OF HIS NAME, WAS FOUND DRENCHED IN BLOOD,
MORTALLY WOUNDED, IN HIS PAVILION.
I was asked to confront the weight of my actions...
my whole fleet was burned to ashes...
Yet my beloved daughter Shireen will comfort me
as long as she is with me...
In the ruins of Castle Black, anyone will find
the lonely charred corpses of the parents and their child...
CHAPTER IV:
THE GOD OF THE DECEASED
AND
THE FINAL JUDGEMENT
When I awoke, I was all alone in a dreary place...
the Seventh of Heavens...
whether redemption or damnation, the one who decides is
the Stranger itself... (the God of the Deceased)
Even the most depraved sinners will be saved
if they pay the price...
and that price is not paid in gold,
but in flesh and blood.
I smile, for the first time in decades, to the Stranger,
and then, softly whisper:
"I will never hand over such a price...
never in my afterlife..."
Thus, I suddenly reeled, and lost my footing,
and plunged into the depths of the Seventh of Hells...
And thus, sin is my only consideration,
in the judgement of bigotry...
for I will not let anyone ever...
write the sentence of those sins...
Thus, someday, I will reunite, in my next life, with these hands,
the fragments of depravity...
And thus, the Seventh of Hells will finally turn to
the best of all worlds for my wife, our daughter, and me...
.........................................................................................................
THE BROADSWORD OF REVENGE
O wayward sinner...
Thus, prithee regret all you have done...
NOM DE GUERRE: MAID OF TARTH
AZOR AHAI: THE RIGHTEOUS SAVIOUR
BLUE IS THE COLOUR OF SORROW AND COLDNESS...
KEEP OF CASTLE BLACK
Hear, Lady Stoneheart, know that I am right now
pointing with a sword at a certain person,
who deceived many others...
An ambitious person who thinks only of what's right...
For the sake of this person's ambition,
the one I loved died violently in my arms...
Though I am innocent, I am still accused of it...
yet those who pursue me have not ended my life...
At last the moment of truth and revenge is here...
Regret, regret all you have done!
THE REVENGE OF THE BLUE MAIDEN
NOM DE GUERRE: MAID OF TARTH
Hallo und auf Wiedersehen, Herr Azor Ahai...
I will set fire to your keep... Tell me now what you prefer...
Do I run my cold steel blade across and through your throat,
or let you burn to a crisp within this inferno?
THE REDEMPTION
Hear, Lady Stoneheart, I don't care who's the villain...
I should give him a second chance for atonement, right?
And thus did I say to him:
"Strip yourself of everything you value and prize..."
THAT PRICE IS NOT PAID IN GOLD,
BUT IN FLESH AND BLOOD.
If you confess out loud everything you did "for religion,"
only on that condition will I spare your life...
And thus said he in response:
"Of what I did for the LORD'S sake...
[AZOR AHAI: THE RIGHTEOUS SAVIOUR]
... I will never let go of anything!"
RIGHTFUL KING OF THE LANDS OF WESTEROS
STANNIS BARATHEON
Right, there's nothing left to do, you twat...
In truth, in sooth, regret and repent!
AZOR AHAI: THE RIGHTEOUS SAVIOUR
CHOSEN BY R'HLLOR
JUDGEMENT OF BIGOTRY
JUDGEMENT OF BIGOTRY
Hallo und auf Wiedersehen, Herr Azor Ahai...
The righteous swordsman stifled by his own bigotry...
his body drenched in my wrath and that of other innocents...
Prithee, fall asleep forever...
SHE WAS ACCUSED OF KILLING HER BELOVED
HIS BROTHER HAD GIVEN THE ORDER
SHE DECIDED TO GET REVENGE
MEMORY
Hear, Lady Stoneheart, you are still on your own...
you are still all alone on your own...
SEVEN YEARS AGO
You were separated from both of your daughters,
and you feared that they would forget your face one day...
Do you hear, Lady Stoneheart, it seems that the Lannisters
are no longer here and no longer a threat...
CATELYN'S DAUGHTERS
I am sure that they are somewhere in this wide world...
FIVE YEARS AGO
Those two girls have already vanished, as if into thin air...
Now your daughter am I, only me and me alone...
THEN, THE MAIDEN WENT INSANE
Hear, Your Grace...
[I LEFT IT ALL BEHIND
YOU KNOW, I LEFT IT ALL BEHIND]
...Look at me...
THE LAST BROADSWORD
JUDGEMENT OF BIGOTRY
Simply...
[AZOR AHAI]
...Look at me
STONEHEART
CATELYN
Hallo und auf Wiedersehen, Eure Hoheit...
Leader of fanatics, righteous bigot...
Hear, Lady Stoneheart, why did your husband
trust that person that much?
Now, in sooth, everything has come to an end...
We will put an end to everything...
To this sinful story of evil...
Fare thee well...
(My beloved...)
(The one I hated the most...)
...........................................................................................
CAPRICCIO MUMMERY
The defendant's seat is empty...
The barrister's seat is full of trash...
Thus, let us now begin
this mummery known as
a "trial"...
[Grayscaled Princess]
Following the decrees of the Lord of Light,
one only vessel is now solely missing.
If you happen by chance to know its whereabouts,
please contact the Lady with the Heart of Stone...
[Lady Stoneheart]
Turning back time, changing ever shape and master,
finally, at last, it has appeared upon the stage,
yet, however, I do not know its real whereabouts...
Perchance it may be in the hands of that person...
[Servants]
Seek her, seek her, seek her everywhere,
to the left, to the right, looking up and looking down...
For the one who holds all the Keys,
the Stranger, the Many-Faced God of the Deceased...
[Lightbringer]
For how long will this mummery be carried on?
There is no longer any life beyond it...
[Fallen Queen]
The souls of mortals once fell into the trap...
There is nothing now that can be done or that has not been done...
[Servants]
Swaying scales
in a shattered scenario,
vessels tainted by the sins of yore...
Each one singing a song of one's own,
in a discordant capriccio...
The story has slipped from the hands of the Gods,
and now it unfurls free, with a life of its own...
If those people were still upon this Earth,
they would have been most likely to sigh...
[Lightbringer]
What is really to be dreaded is...
[Grayscaled Princess]
...the desires of mortalkind...
[Grayscaled Princess]:
THE DIRECTOR OF THE THEATRE.
SHE HAS INHERITED HER FATHER'S PLACE.
[Lady Stoneheart]:
SHE LIVES IN THE THEATRE, AND SHE CREATED IT.
REAL NAME: CATELYN STARK, NÉE TULLY.
[Lightbringer]:
AFTER LOSING HIS POWER,
HE BECAME THE SHADOW OF A FLAMING SWORD.
THUS, HE CANNOT ENTER THE THEATRE.
[Fallen Queen]:
ONCE SHE WAS A WISTFUL, NAIVE RED-HAIRED DRESSMAKER.
SHE OFFICIALLY OBEYS LADY STONEHEART,
YET SHE IS WILFUL AND DEVIOUS.
[Grayscaled Princess]
Let us put some order and arrange this information...
Tempted to follow your heart, you thus turned evil...
Now I grant you permission to speak.
Please, give your account of when you entered this theatre...
[Oathbreaker]
The burden of what I have done is a curse upon me,
and, to be freed from said curse, I needed something...
I entered this place because I wanted to find
the missing ancestral sword of my forefathers...
[Servants]
Slaughter him, butcher him, and then devour him!
Smite the intruder with the worst of punishments!
Sentence him, sentence him, sentence him come what may...
Sentence him to torture, to scourge, to death!
[Oathbreaker]
Once I expected the worst, having lost my every hope...
The tall, blue-eyed maiden drew her sword and she fought for me...
[Oathkeeper]
I would not forgive myself if I left you to die...
[Oathbreaker]
And thus, she became the Oathkeeper...
Right-handed Oathkeeper...
Left-handed Oathbreaker...
The replacement vessels have not awakened yet...
Concealing their true intentions within their hearts,
the two unassuming intruders.
Grayscaled Princess, Lady with a Heart of Stone,
Lightbringer, Faithful Servant, God of the Deceased...
When everything comes to a bitter end,
¿who will be the ones to laugh at the end of the day?
[Green Dreamer]:
Lulila, lulila, lulila-lila...
Erratic heartbeats in dreams of things to come...
[Oathbreaker]:
SEEKING THE ANCESTRAL SWORD BRIGHTROAR,
HE ENTERED THE THEATRE.
REAL NAME: JAIME LANNISTER.
[Oathkeeper]:
SHE IS A MAID AT THE THEATRE,
BUT SHE DOES NOT WANT TO CHANGE HER PLACE.
SHE IS THE INCARNATION OF A LOYAL, BRAVE KNIGHT.
[Faithful Servant]:
SHE IS A MAID AT THE THEATRE,
BUT SHE DOES NOT WANT TO CHANGE HER PLACE.
SHE IS A SPIRIT RELEASED FROM HER MIRROR PRISON.
[The God of Many Faces]:
ONE OF THEIR FACES IS THE STRANGER.
STANNIS BARATHEON MET THIS DEITY IN THE AFTERLIFE.
[Green Dreamer]:
HE RESIDES IN THE DREAMLAND OF THE GRAYSCALED PRINCESS.
STILL UNIDENTIFIED.
Friendship, trauma, justice, illusion,
hope, destruction, dreams, lust, love, death...
It all keeps on dissolving, mixing, returning
in an ominous lullaby...
Right before he died, lonely as he was,
he created a theatre...
That "best of all worlds" he desired that much,
will it be fulfilled someday?
Come on, let us play our parts
in this mummery known as
"life..."
Oh, the Green Dreamer is Jojen and the Fallen Queen is Sansa. The Faithful Servant is Cersei. And some more Jaimienne here to contrarrest the Lannincest and Renlienne in previous installments...
Hope you like my Westeros take on the Evillious Chronicles... The Westerious Chronicles!!!
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SEVEN SINS AND SEVEN PUNISHMENTS
JAIME:
Thus, let us begin!
JOFFREY:
Seven flowers are dancing a quadrille,
sins that have been finally set free...
Covering, concealing their lurid reality...
sinking into pleasure found in others' pain...
WYMAN:
Seven seeds are descending one by one,
they will surely sprout and then grow strong...
Even the whole Known World will be dissolved
in the powerful acids within me...
CERSEI:
Our Reign of Iniquity, founded on golden rocks,
will never crumble, falter, or fall...
The vessels of evil, once released
by cursed siblings who were the children of siblings,
what kind of tale will they make unfurl?
Seven Sins and Seven Punishments...
OBERYN:
Drifting away on seven breezes,
a lethal poison pervades the Known World...
All of the guilty ones are unable to sleep well tonight,
regretting a sin of yore that was not...
PETYR:
On the waters of seven waterfalls,
the reflection is the face of a loved one...
Yet the reflections always differ, and yours is not the only one...
If only they did not exist...
STANNIS:
Within the Lightbringer's throne room under ground,
thus, let us now begin this mummery known as a "trial..."
Everyone seeks to attain
what he or she calls "the best of all possible worlds..."
To which outcome will their desires lead?
Seven Sins and Seven Punishments...
BRIENNE:
Is it the song of the flames I hear? Can I hear it?
No, 'tis the cold steel of vengeance...
The vessels of evil, once released
by cursed siblings who were the children of siblings,
what kind of tale will they make unfurl?
Seven Sins and Seven Punishments...
OMINOUS LULLABY #7
Lulilala, lulila-lara...
Lulilala, lulila-lara...
Lulilala, lulila-lara...
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