DID YOU KNOW...

... that Gaston, the huntsman who stalked Belle, shot Bambi's mother dead? (At least, her head hangs on his trophy wall)?
...that Jaime Lannister is the birth father of Joffrey and his younger siblings?
...that (speaking of Lannisters) Tyrion, the Imp, may be a bastard of Aerys II Targaryen?
...that Joffrey, and Jack Gleeson, physically resemble Caligula?
...that the quack of a duck does not echo, for some unknown reason?
...that there is another badass general I have learned to know, and it's Frenchman at the service of Austria Count de Rabutin?
...that real-life Vikings had NO horns on their helmets, and rather instead used cow horns as drinking cups?
...that Pluto is now officially a DWARF planet?
...how to change the time when the season changes? Spring forwards, fall backwards!
...that a vomitorium was actually the door to an amphitheatre?
...that frogs sometimes mate in threesomes (two males to a female)?
...that (speaking of frogs), you can't slowly boil a frog to death if it hasn't been lobotomized in advance?
...that there once was a female Pope, by the name of Joan, in the Middle Ages?
...that (speaking of Popes), five or ten Popes have abdicated before Benedict XVI?

POCOYIZED DISNEY CHARACTERS

I was going to do the Mad Hatter, but there were no top hats.
So I made this über-camp Ratcliffe instead!

No one looks better pocoyized than Gaston!

Captain Hook (TICK-TOCK, TICK-TOCK)

Tinker Bell

Wendy Darling

Peter Pan

QoH: "Off with her head!"

Alice in Wonderland...

Naveen: the carefree royal

Tiana: the social climber

Lottie LaBouff: the Southern belle

Meg: a damsel in distress who doesn't need a hero to save her

Phoebus "You were saying, Lieutenant?"

Esme: "God help the outcasts"

Brave Merida

Gothel

Flynn/Eugene

Rapunzel: when will her life begin?

Hans (Love is an open doooor!)

Kristoff

Elsa (Let it go, let it go)

Anna: for the first time in forever...

THERE'S NO ONE LIKE GASTON

Because:

No one loves himself like Gaston!
No one looks good in red like Gaston!
No one has a baritone like Gaston!
No one is as obstinate as a suitor like Gaston!
No one shoots like Gaston!
No one wears boots like Gaston!
No one drinks ale like Gaston!
No one backstabs like Gaston!
And, lastly, because...
No one falls from heights like Gaston!