viernes, 29 de agosto de 2025

UPTOWN GUY (Grantaire, Seed of Hanged Men)

This queer/wizarding cover is Grantaire's image song in El semen de los ahorcados. In it he emphasizes the social gap between himself and Enjolras, but also hope that he will get some attention...


Uptown guy
he's been living in an uptown s
ky

I bet he's never had a backstreet guy

I bet his parents never told him why
I'm gonna try for an

Uptown guy
he's been living in h
is pure-blood sky

As long as anyone with hot blood can
And now, he's looking for a downtown man
That's what I am


And when he knows what he wants from his ti-i-me
And when he wakes up and makes up his mi-i-ind


he'll see I'm not so tough
Just because 
I'm in love with an

Uptown guy
You know I've seen him in his pure-blood sky
he's getting tired of all high class toys
And all the presents from such uptown boys

he's got a choice
Uptown guy
You know I can't afford to catch his eye

But maybe, someday, when my ship comes in
he'll understand what kind of guy I've been

And then I'll win



And when he's walking, he's looking so fi-i-ine
And when he's talking, he'll say that he's mi-i-ine

he'll say I'm not so tough
Just because 
I'm in love with an

Uptown guy
he's been living in his pure-blood sky

As long as anyone with hot blood can
And now, he's looking for a downtown man
That's what I am


Uptown guy, he's my uptown guy
You know I'm in love with an uptown guy, my uptown guy...

VIVO EN SOLEDAD (F. Mercury)

 VIVO EN SOLEDAD – Freddie Mercury

Traducción de Sandra Dermark

28 de agosto, MMXXV

*****************

A veces siento que me pongo a llorar,

no hay donde ir ni cómo el tiempo ocupar

Estoy sola… tan sola…

Vivo en soledad, oh oh oh

(Interludio)

A veces siento que me pongo a llorar,

no hay donde ir ni cómo el tiempo ocupar

Estoy sola… tan sola…

Vivo en soledad, oh oh oh

A veces corro a toda velocidad

y el mundo entero se cae sobre mí (sobre mí)

Me vuelvo loca, oh tan loca

Vivo en soledad (oh oh oh)

+++++++++++++++

ESTRIBILLO:

Di do deee, di do deee

Yo no tengo tiempo para monerías

Di do dee, di do dee

Estoy tan sola, sola, sola, ¡sí!

Sé que los buenos tiempos vendrán…

*********

A veces sé que no me dan advertencias,

y mi cabeza en las nubes está,

en mis sueños,

no es tan fácil que

viva en soledad, ah ah, ah ah

+++++++++++++

ESTRIBILLO:

Di do deee, di do deee

Yo no tengo tiempo para monerías

Di do dee, di do dee

Estoy tan sola, sola, sola, ¡sí!

Sé que los buenos tiempos vendrán…

ESTRIBILLO:

Di do deee, di do deee

Yo no tengo tiempo para monerías

Di do dee, di do dee

Estoy tan sola, sola, sola, ¡sí!

Sé que los buenos tiempos vendrán…

………..

Tirorí, voy a tener suerte

Tirorí, voy a tener suerte

Tirorí, voy a tener suerte

a tener suerte, a tener suerte, ¡oh sí!

Tirorí, voy a tener suerte

Tirorí, voy a tener suerte

Tirorí, voy a tener suerte

a tener suerte, a tener suerte, ¡oh sí!

(Estribillo instrumental)

++++++++++++++

ESTRIBILLO:

Di do deee, di do deee

Yo no tengo tiempo para monerías

Di do dee, di do dee

Estoy tan sola, sola, sola, ¡sí!

Sé que los buenos tiempos vendrán…

miércoles, 27 de agosto de 2025

RAPSODIA DERMARKIANA

 RAPSODIA DERMARKIANA

(Un filk basado en mis peores sueños)

¿Es esto un sueño? ¿Un falso despertar?

¿Es una fuga de la cruel realidad?

Oh, ¿qué será?... Ten algo de compasión...

Pobre bohemia... viviendo de ilusión...

Es un poco así, poco asá,

mucho más sufrirá...

Donde sopla el viento

nunca más le importará...

No más...

(...)

Mamá... ¿en serio vas

a casarte ahora con él,

volveremos a ser tres?

Mamá... veo que tú y papá

oro y bosques verdes vais a prometer...

Mamá... oh oh oh oh...

No puedo evitar llorar,

parece que esto es un cuento maravilloso:

Tú y yo, él y yo, tres felices para siempre...

(Breve interludio dramático.)

Sola... y os vais sin mí...

a mi suerte me dejáis,

en siniestra oscuridad...

Débil e indefensa, tras esta traición...

me han clavado entre la espada y la pared...

Mamá... y papá...

¿Si os quisiérais más

el uno al otro, dejaríais de quererme?

(Interludio dramático, de blues al principio, que se va convirtiendo en algo mucho más excéntrico...)

Hay mil capillas... ¿Esto es una boda real?

San Quintín, San Quintín, quítate todo el fango,

¡Rayos y centellas! ¡Yo soy una estrella! ¡Sí!

Sandra Dermark, Sandra Dermark, ¿quieres un plato de arroz?

(De arroz atroz... ¡oh oh oh oh!)

Estoy sin blanca hasta el dos de mayo...

¡Pobre bohemia! ¡Va a morir de inanición!

¡Prueba el arroz gratis sin dilación!

Con fruición, convicción, ¿te gustó el arroz?

¡Son larvas! ¡NOOOO! ¿Y me ofrecéis arroz? (¡Es atroz!)

¡Son larvas! ¡NOOOO! ¿Y me ofrecéis arroz? (¡Es atroz!)

¡Eso no es arroz! (¡Emético!)

¡Eso no es arroz! (¡Emético!)

¡Eso no es arroz! (¡Emético!)

¡Eso no es arroz! (¡Emético!)

¡NO, NO, NO, NO, NO, NO!

¡Mamma mia! ¡Mamma mia! ¿Me ofrecéis emético?

¿Devuelves tú? ¡Hay un huevo reservao por mí, por mí, por míííí...!

(Interludio entre náuseas y frenesí)

¿Conque soy tan ingenua? ¡Os vais a enterar!

¿Conque yo soy tan crédula? ¡Os voy a enseña-a-ar!

¡No hay huevos! ¡Quiero crudos dos huevos!

Il n'y a pas a faire... je vais faire mon propre émétique!

(¡Fairy verde... mostaza de Dijon... sal gorda... un poco de miel... y un vaso de vodka!)

Oh... Wüurg-kyah! Wüurg-kyah! Wüurg-kyah!

(Interludio instrumental)

Nada más importa...

Nunca más a mí...

Nada más me importa...

Nada más me importa

a mí...

Donde sopla el viento...

martes, 26 de agosto de 2025

CUENTOS MÍOS DE RECUERDOS

 

Puesta de sol en Bohuslän

Me acuerdo de cuando era pequeña, todos aquellos veranos en la costa oeste de Suecia. Islotes graníticos, pelados y grises, y cielos plomizos llenos de lluvia. Y un sol veraniego mucho más suave que el de Benicasim, más fresco, hundiéndose en el mar, entre aquellos austeros y grises islotes, mientras saboreo un Cornetto, y el mar dorado antes de volver a casa de la abuela cuando empieza a hacer oscuro. Esas tardes no volverán. El Cornetto, la abuela ya no existe y hace años que no piso Bohuslän.


Gracias a vosotros...
Estuvisteis allí cuando nací, en aquella clínica, hace más de treinta y tres veranos.
Me hicisteis el mejor fricasé de pollo, que no podía ser más meloso.
Me comprasteis el curso de Magic English, sin el cual no habría podido hacer la carrera de Traducción.
Me contasteis los mejores cuentos todas las tardes.
Estuvisteis a mi lado cada vez que estaba enferma.
José, Ana, hace más de una década que os fuisteis, pero no sería nada sin todo lo que me hicisteis.
Con todo mi amor,
Vuestra nietecita.

lunes, 25 de agosto de 2025

CORAZONES QUE SE ENCUENTRAN

 "Corazones que se encuentran". Esta es la segunda nana popular que Fantine le cantaba a Cosette en El semen de los ahorcados. Valjean también se la regaló como caja de música, dejándole primero la llave bajo la almohada, pero esta vez le había encargado la cajita en el taller de un fabricante del callejón Diagón. No fue un regalo de Navidad, de Pascua ni de cumpleaños: simplemente una sorpresa que ella no se esperaba.

No se sabe la letra completa (no sale en toda la saga), sólo el título y el verso "Esta es la canción del amor que no se va". Es muy probable que Cosette no recordara la letra entera. La melodía es suave y a ritmo de vals. Es una melodía muy similar al Danubio Azul; tal vez Fantine la hubiera adaptado de ese vals de Strauss.

domingo, 17 de agosto de 2025

Maid mit dem nussbraunen Haar

Maid mit dem nussbraunen Haar (Star of the County Down) this is a boy scout song in Germany and similar countries


 Eines morgens ging ich so für mich hin

im Juli Sonnenschein
Den Wiesenpfad den Hang hinab 
kam ein schönes Mägdelein
und sie lacht mich an
und ich freu mich dran
und bewunder' ihr nussbraunes Haar
einer lockenden Fee
kam ich kaum in die Näh’
ganz verwirrt von dem nussbraun’ Haar

Chorus:
Von Mittelland bis an Pajas Rand 
von Todea nach Iskamar 
hab ich noch keine geseh’n 
die war halb so schön
wie diese Maid mit dem nussbraunen Haar

Doch sie ging unbeirrt
ihres Weges verwirrt
stand ich da
und nur eins war klar
Als ein Bauer kam sprach ich: Lieber Mann
Wer ist die Maid mit dem nussbraunen Haar ?
Und er lacht mich an
und mit Stolz sagt er dann
Sie ist die Perle von unserer Kron’
Sie ist ein aufgehender Stern
von den Ufern nicht fern
verdrehte manchem den Kopf hier schon

Chorus:
Von Mittelland bis an Pajas Rand 
von Todea nach Iskamar 
hab ich noch keine geseh’n 
die war halb so schön
wie diese Maid mit dem nussbraunen Haar


Doch ich sah sie beim Tanz
unterm Erntekranz
eines Abends im Sommerkleid
Mit verführendem Blick
warb ich geschickt
um das Herz meiner nussbraunen Maid.
Gab mein Wort dafür
keinen Pflug ich für
und ich schwörte so manches wahr
und von diesem Tag an
sie bei mir lag
meine Maid mit dem nussbraunen Haar

Chorus:
Von Mittelland bis an Pajas Rand 
von Todea nach Iskamar 
hab ich noch keine geseh’n 
die war halb so schön
wie diese Maid mit dem nussbraunen Haar

Etwas später im Jahr
dann als trautes Paar
gingen wir spazieren stolz.
Im Walde erspäht
ich ein heisses Gerät
mit Haar schwarz wie Ebenholz.
Und so endete dann
dieser magische Bann
meiner Maid mit dem nussbraunen Haar.
Was habt ihr denn gedacht ?
Hach, das wär doch gelacht.
Ich bin ein Barde
das war doch klar

Denn von Mittelland bis an Pajas Rand 
von Todea nach Iskamar 
ob schwarz, braun, blond 
werbe ich gekonnt
meine Maiden mit schönem Haar

Ja von Mittelland bis an Pajas Rand 
von Todea nach Iskamar 
ob schwarz, braun, blond 
werbe ich gekonnt
meine Maiden mit schönem Haar

THE FAIRY SWING

Down in the apple orchard,

where petals fell like rain

round little Mary Catherine

as she made a daisy chain

---------------------

She used a lot of daisies,

she fashioned it with care...

heard her mother calling her

and left it hanging there.

-------------------------------------

When later she went back again

she heard a wee voice singing,

and in her daisy chain she saw

a lovely fairy swinging!

-------------------------

Now Mary Catherine always leaves

her daisy chains behind.

If fairies use them for their swings,

she says she doesn't mind.


ME ENCANTA LA GENTE SENCILLA

 Me encanta la gente sencilla,

la que no aparenta ser

lo que no es,

mira de frente,

abraza con sinceridad

y encuentra felicidad

en lo pequeño.

La que ríe sin máscaras

y se emociona por tus alegrías.

Porque tener cerca a personas

así es como vivir con un rayo

de sol todos los días.

HITLER HAS ONLY GOT ONE BALL

This song is sung by Gavroche Thénardier as a battle song and cheer song in The Seed of Hanged Men Book V, and he was killed while singing it (at "poor old Goebbels" in stanza 2):

Hitler

has only got one ball

Göring

has two but very small

Himmler

has something sim'lar

but poor old Goebbels

has no balls at all

Rommel

has four or five, I guess

No one's

sure about Rudolf Hess

Schmeling

is always yelling

but poor old Goebbels

has no balls at all

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Post-retcon in both the webtoon and the revised fic, Gavroche is killed while singing the Quintilius Varus song (at the first "Sir Quintilius Varus"). He still knows "Hitler Has Only Got One Ball," but it is not his death song. It's this one instead:

When the Romans got the mania,

Sim serim sim sim sim sim,

they marched up north to Germania,

Sim serim sim sim sim sim,

Riding in front, irreparable,

Tan taran tan tan tan tan,

Was their boldest general,

Tan taran tan tan tan tan,

Sir Quintilius Varus,

of course, of course, of course,

Sir Quintilius Varus,

Trallalala, trallalala, trallalala, lala lala!!!


sábado, 16 de agosto de 2025

LUNA DE PAPEL (Canción de cuna ancestral)

En El semen de los ahorcados, libro I, Valjean le regala a Cosette por Navidad una caja de música que su madre había comprado para ella, y que tocaba la nana ancestral que Fantine le cantaba a su hija antes de dejarla con los Thénardier. Pero antes le dejó a la joven la llave, colándose en las dependencias de Hufflepuff aquella nochebuena y dejando la llave bajo la almohada, que Cosette encontró la mañana siguiente y se preguntó todo el día qué cerradura abriría esa llave, hasta que Valjean le regaló la cajita. Al sonar la nana, Cosette rompió a llorar. En la tapa había dos pajaritos besándose en una rama bajo la luna, y la llave tenía forma de estrella.

LUNA DE PAPEL (Canción de cuna ancestral)

Luna de papel,

luna de algodón,

guarda los sueños

en tu corazón.

Cierra los ojos,

mi niña querida,

que mamá te cuida,

nunca te olvida

Estrellas de plata bailan por ti,

susurran secretos que sólo yo sé,

Duerme tranquila, mi niña bonita,

que en mis brazos siempre estarás...

.....

Pero había otra nana que Fantine le cantaba, y con la que se despidieron. Esa vieja canción de cuna, igualmente ancestral, causaba una reacción más visceral en Cosette, y su madre se la cantaba más en sueños, cada vez que Cosette revivía la despedida:

Duerme, mi niña querida,
que la Luna te cuidará
Mientras las estrellas brillan,
mamá siempre volverá...

viernes, 15 de agosto de 2025

LA ESTRELLA DE LA REGIÓN (VERSIÓN DE GRANTAIRE)

 La estrella de la región 

Traducción de Tom Bombadil - adaptada por StrixAlluka

Esta es la versión que canta Grantaire en El semen de los ahorcados, libro III. Junto a la fogata, durante la misión de rescate para liberar a Enjolras de la Mansión de Satigny. Otra versión está ambientada en Irlanda como el original, no en la provincia de Castellón como la versión de Tom Bombadil.

A dos millas de aquí, un pueblo yo vi

que brillaba bajo el sol...

Nada más entrar, yo la vi venir,

decir hola y sonreír.

Parecía ser dulce como la miel

desde el pelo hasta los pies...

Ella me hechizó, yo me estremecí,

no me pude mover de allí...

*****************

De este a oeste, de norte a sur, 

de provincia a la capital,

nunca encontré una mujer así 

como la que en el pueblo vi...

********************

Cuando ella pasó, me rompió el corazón,

la mirada se iba detrás...

No me pude aguantar, pregunté a un peatón:

"¿quién es la del pelo marrón?"

Él me sonrió y me contestó:

"Esa es nuestra perfección

Se llama Lily y nació aquí,

es la estrella de la región".

***************

De este a oeste, de norte a sur,

de provincia a la capital,

nunca encontré una mujer así 

como la que en el pueblo vi...

**************

Tenía suaves ojos color de miel

y la boca como una flor,

y su dulce voz no era nada atroz

cuando cantaba una canción.

Por la noche de San Juan, me dejaba sin hablar

y me partía el corazón

verla piruetear con otro galán

a la estrella de la región.

***************

De este a oeste, de norte a sur,

de provincia a la capital,

nunca encontré una mujer así 

como la que en el pueblo vi...

*****************+

Hoy empieza abril, será fiesta allí,

compraré un nuevo pantalón,

me lavaré con jabón, me pondré loción,

me sentaré a esperar a un rincón.

Ni un cigarro fumaré, ni una gota beberé

para que ella no piense mal

Cuando empiecen a tocar, me pondré a bailar,

y ella rápido a mí vendrá...

**************

De este a oeste, de norte a sur,

de provincia a la capital,

nunca encontré una mujer así 

como la que en el pueblo vi...

*************

De este a oeste, de norte a sur,

de provincia a la capital,

nunca encontré una mujer así 

como la que en el pueblo vi...

miércoles, 13 de agosto de 2025

HERE'S TO US ALL LEFTIES

Here's to Link,

to Arya Stark,

to Ehud ben Gera, 

to Leo da Vinci,

to the Prince of Tennis,

to Joan of Arc,

to my grandmothers,

to my parents,

to yours truly,

the list is endless,

so that every day, not only the 13th of August,

would be World Left-Handed Day!

viernes, 8 de agosto de 2025

THE YEAR OF GREAT MEDLARS

In The Seed of Hanged Men, Final Conflict, Book 5 ----- corresponds to the "barricade subplot and nearly everyone dying" part of canon. Everyone returns to the Seed universe's Earth and a final course begins; an anti-war play is staged at Hogwarts, The Year of Great Medlars, written by Courfeyrac (his first and only tragedy) and starring him as Dauphin Francis of Valois, Combeferre as Count Sebastian de' Montecuccoli, James Norrington (Hufflepuff) as Prince Henri of Valois, and Musichetta as Caterina de' Medici. Lady Alistair marries Count de Satigny and his personal troupe puts on a separate production of The Year of Great Medlars at the Satigny estate. After the play (the Hogwarts performance), Enjolras loses his cool being provoked by Montparnasse, tearing off his prefect badge and claiming back the prefecture of Slytherin by force, leading to a declaration of war... The Xeniades Club, the pack of werewolves who turned Grantaire, and the Condesce's army storm Hogwarts, leading to the last stand of AS-SORTED. Grantaire has, while drugged with the Draught of Living Death, a dream inspired by the Lamb Lies Down, from the Chamber of 32 Doors onwards, with himself as Rael and Enj as John, before waking up and dying at the end of the battle, holding Enj's hand... Lunar eclipse.

On the cover of the script of The Year of Great Medlars there is a quatrain written by Courfeyrac in the style of Nostradamus, that spoils the whole play:

A thirsty prince in the August sun...
A cupbearer seized is never fun...
A sister-in-law ruled by envy and greed...
A wish for peace that came true indeed.

The play is significant because it's Courfeyrac's first and only tragedy, in which the author expresses his uncertainties about going to war and about coming of age. Due to taking place in the Renaissance, amongst royalty, the play is written and performed in the style of Shakespeare, though with an exaggerated bent similar to Shakespeare's plays-within-plays (The Murder of Gonzago, Pyramus and Thisbe, et al.) and to the Ember Island Players. In fact, the author of the whole fic saga (StrixAlluka) names Shakespeare and the Ember Island Players as the primary inspirations. As well as the historical event (the Montecuccoli affair, in Tournon-sur-Rhône, August 1536) whose characters mirror those in The Seed and in Les Misérables canon who star in Medlars.
The fruit from which the play takes its title is the German medlar (NOT the Japanese medlar), known in France in the Renaissance as mêle (term used by Rabelais, the first chapter of whose saga Count Sebastian reads aloud to Dauphin Francis --the pentalogy is being written by Rabelais and proofread by the royal cupbearer as the story is taking place, and the characters are avatars of the people the author knows, the heroic prince Pantagruel being a counterpart of Dauphin Francis, and his bromantic pal, the well-read Panurge, of Count Sebastian de' Montecuccoli, the whole epic novel --or fic-- having a pacifistic and free-thinking ideology... Rabelais was writing a real-person fanfic, that became an AU after the tragic deaths of the people who inspired his heroes!--), and still today (the German medlar) as trou du cul (anus, "asshole") and in Shakespeare's English as open-arse (term most famously used by Mercutio --don't forget that StrixAlluka was once Freddie Mercutio!--). 
The shape of the German medlar, Mespilus germanica, suggests a dilated anus. In turn, mêle evokes mela (apple in Italian, German medlars being closely related to roses and to apples), and thus, the Forbidden Fruit of Eden: Rabelais' medlars are also described as "easy on the eyes and pleasant to the taste," like the Forbidden Fruit in Genesis. 
The whole read about the Great Medlars may sound like a big-lipped-alligator moment, but it is actually a statement that evokes a lost Golden Age, without the courtly intrigues, wars, and poisonings that the characters have to endure (and that lead to their deaths, this being in Courf's own words "a queer Romeo and Juliet", both dauphin and cupbearer being, though praised and popular, called "queer" --in both senses of the word-- behind their backs, and this also leading to their downfall; remaining single at 18 while there are a lot of prospective fiancées, most prominently Bloody Mary, definitely raised suspicions... both leads being, in the play and in real life, doomed to die young, single, and childless, and the peace between France and the Habsburg Empire being signed at the cost of the lives of both queer star-crossed lovers... The play starts with the arrival of Count Sebastian and Caterina de' Medici in Marseille and her wedding to Henry, spare to the throne... and ends with the rise to power of Henry and Caterina --who poisoned her brother-in-law and blamed his cupbearer lover-- after the violent deaths of both star-crossed leads). 
The Year of Great Medlars is, thus, the utopia of a Lost Golden Age, when Lent didn't take place in March, the Kalends were found in the Greek calendars (look up "Greek Kalends" on Google; well, it means the same as "when pigs fly;" the kalends were the first day of months in the Latin calendar, but they don't exist in the Greek calendar), one week had three leap Thursdays (Catalan "la setmana dels tres dijous" means the same as "Greek Kalends") due to the Sun having taken a few missteps, the Moon left her orbit and rose in the sky far above the usual, and even the stars were changing their places, for instance Spica moved from the hand of Virgo to the scales of Libra (Courf's own Sun sign). 
The ground watered with the pure blood of Abel gave rise to oversized fruits, including watermelon-sized (Quaffle-sized) German medlars (three of which could fill a bushel), easy on the eye and pleasant to the taste (just like the Forbidden Fruit), that caused their eaters to swell in various body parts and start lineages of "endowed" superhumans (the polar opposite of the tasteless but lethal arsenic consumed after the tennis match, that causes the tragic hero to waste away). This Golden Age is contrasted with both the Renaissance in which Medlars the play takes place... and with the war-torn Hogwarts at the last year of everyone in The Seed; Courf having foretold his own death (in battle, not by poisoning) and revealing his inner self full of uncertainty about the future.

AN EXCERPT FROM THE PLAY
CATERINA (MUSICHETTA): "For years I played chess, day after day, with Pope Clement. He taught me all the strategies... Throughout their lives, all my guardians have seen me as a simple-minded pawn. But they all overlooked the most important thing about pawns..."
SEBASTIAN (COMBEFERRE): That a pawn might become a queen?
CATERINA (nods): Exactly... I was so disappointed when I found out that I had married the wrong prince, who, moreover, is in love with another. A lady old enough to be his mum, and as tall as a giraffe, who happens to have a trick up his sleeve...
SEBASTIAN: What "trick"? I barely know Mme. Diane de Poitiers...
CATERINA: She suctions him. She has a very muscular pussy, which she uses to suck his member, with her nether mouth. No other woman can do that. Anyway, when life gives you lemons, you have to take advantage of the situation... Fix someone's drink, get them out of the picture. A Medici of Florence, even if she is a little maiden, knows what to do. Before this summer and this war are over, that person will get thirsty and consume the wrong drink... and we will have our way.
SEBASTIAN: Do you mean Diane... or do you mean him? Let me tell you something I have been fearing to tell you: all this time I have joined his entourage as the mole you wanted... and gotten to know him. Now I am his squire, his cupbearer, and his secretary. And his confidant, who keeps all his secrets. I am His Royal Highness's right-hand man. And we have become friends, maybe more than friends... there is something more.
CATERINA (stroking her poison ring): Then, I'll have to put you two out of the picture... Single and childless at 18, and that reveal... He may die single and childless at 80, but I prefer him to disappear the sooner the better, this very summer to be more precise. I am so sorry, Sebastian, but I did never expect you to be a turncloak... I will have to change my strategy, change it so that you two (strokes her poison ring) will be out of the way - forever. You will never see this pawn soon to be crowned the new queen...



jueves, 7 de agosto de 2025

EL MARISCAL DE LA CARRERA MÁS MODÉLICA

 Esta canción de Gilbert & Sullivan (la primera estrofa) la canta Courfeyrac en el concurso de talentos de Hogwarts en El semen de los ahorcados (AU de Hogwarts de Enjoltaire) y más tarde en el Baile de Máscaras de Año Nuevo. Es la original en la versión inglesa y en la sueca. Pero en la castellana es mi propia traducción:

Yo soy el Mariscal de la carrera más modélica,

de barcos de papel guié la escuadra más quimérica.

Me sé los reyes godos y todo conflicto histórico

de Maratón a Waterloo, en orden categórico...

Soy también un experto en materias matemáticas,

sé resolver funciones, las sencillas y cuadráticas,

dicen todos que soy el heredero de Pitágoras...

(Pitágoras... ágoras... ¡LO TENGO!)

y sé las tres virtudes que poseen las mandrágoras

(Sabe las tres virtudes que poseen las mandrágoras,

sabe las tres virtudes que poseen las mandrágoras,

sabe las tres virtudes que poseen las mandrago-drágoras)

Distingo Rafaeles de los Gerrit Dous y Zoffanies,

me sé el coro de anfibios de Las Ranas de Aristófanes...

De barcos de papel guié la escuadra más quimérica,

yo soy el Mariscal de la carrera más modélica.

miércoles, 6 de agosto de 2025

SNOW QUEEN BY ANTON LOMAEV

 Illustrations by Anton Lomaev, who sets this version during the Roaring 20s:



The trolls having lots of fun before making (and shattering) the Magic Mirror.

You can see Laurel and Hardy impersonators, a general, a typewriter, Napoleon and Livingstone impersonators... these trolls are also tiny. Their leader (Satan? Loki?) looks like a human gentleman, but his shadow is that of a demonic troll!


Gerda and Kai in their vertical garden in their provincial town.
Both of them are golden-haired middle-class kids, and there is a café 
on the bottom floor of Gerda's place



This Snow Queen gives less "goddess" and more "noblewoman".
Her dress style is more old-fashioned than the Clever Princess and other flappers
in this storybook universe - like, two decades before them.


Kai playing the drum - looks like he's a boy scout in this universe

The market in the town square. 
In the bottom right you can see Kai having hitched his sledge to the Snow Queen's... car? In a provincial town like this, before tin lizzies, a Daimler-Benz like that would make quite the stir!


 
Kai as co-pilot in the Snow Queen's motor car! Yes, she has a motor car - that works by magic, I presume





Gerda and the Lady of the Garden (at whose place it is always spring).
The Lady appears to be as old as time - she is wearing an Elizabethan collar 
(maybe she has made a Philosopher's Stone!)
The nutcracker guards are Potsdam Grenadiers (but maybe some Scandinavian regiment has uniforms like these)?




The Clever Princess and her prince are both Brainy Brunettes and in their 20s (the usual age).
She is a flapper, while he is a young gentleman. Both of them looking quite progressive and fashionable.
The fountain in the royal garden shows Hercules fighting some sea monster, with turtles in the corners.
The royal crest appears in the horses' apparel and on the carriage: a simple crown.
The butler looks quite professional (a middle-aged fellow dressed up like a penguin), while the coachman and footmen wear a mix of 1920s and 18th-century liveries.


Here the Clever Princess is singing royalty - like Rumi in K-PDH, but actual royalty!
She reads all newspapers in the world (in the original languages) to read reviews of her performances...

An international celebrity, irradiating charisma
Right before she had the idea of getting married.

In bed she looks more vulnerable - and she wears a candycane-striped pyjamas that, along with her flapper's bob haircut, makes her look androgynous, like an anime character

A fond farewell to Gerda in their very best winter clothes





The ambush in the Dark Forest. 
All the robbers look like they're Romani and like they're all family.
The Robber Woman was about to shoot Gerda, but her daughter the Robber Maiden pardoned the blonde and took her fur muff.
The Robber Maiden looks like Ronia Robberdaughter, by Astrid Lindgren, 
while her mum looks like the same character as an adult.


Entering the Robbers' fortress, here a medieval keep, as usual.
You can see the campfire where they cook all their rabbits on the courtyard - and also the Robber Maiden's reindeer - foreshadowing that Gerda will ride him to the tundra!

A very fond farewell. Notice the Robber Maiden is wearing guns and a jackknife to defend herself.
They look like they have shared an intimate kiss after sharing a bed - headcanon: Robber Maiden is a lesbian and Gerda discovered she is bisexual after sharing a futon with her in the fortress!

Outside the Laplady's home in the tundra - looks like a hobbit hole.
The Laplady is dressed in Saami folk garb

Supper with the Laplady, who is reading a message written by a friend on a lutefisk (salted cod).
For supper there is kalakukko (Finnish fish pie, that square pie), lingonberries, and lichens for the reindeer. 
I wonder what's in Gerda's tankard - could be koskenkorva (Finnish vodka), but that's too strong for a teen. Mulled mead would be the most likely.
Gerda has Arctic ice on her head because the Laplady's home is practically a sauna!



Reunion in the throne room. Both lovers are now young adults.
A war plane and an ocean liner are trapped in the throne room, 
and there is a taxidermied polar bear rug right before the throne.




He is wearing a military-style uniform, most surely his boy scout's uniform,
which grew with him at the ice palace - magic once more!
The throne room is so vast that a war plane - sent on an Arctic expedition - is embedded on the ice floor.


Right before she warms his heart...

Back in town, in springtime - now young adults, yet children at heart


The final illustration: Gerda and Kai as young adults with both grannies and most townspeople
A family portrait! The photo is b/w because Roaring 20s...

This version is one of my favourites, sharing first place with Christian Birmingham and Miss Clara!

PS: Please read my Snow Queen fics on this blog! 
The Queen Beyond the Wall is set in Westeros, starring Brienne (as Gerda), Jaime (as Kai), the Night's Queen (as guess whom?), and other Westerosi characters (to mention: Renly and Loras as a queer Prince and Princess)!
La Fée Verte is set in 19th-century France, starring Enjolras (as Gerda), Grantaire (as Kai), the Green Fairy (as the Snow Queen), and other Les Mis characters (to mention: Éponine as a pretty feisty Robber Maiden)!