Mostrando entradas con la etiqueta persephone. Mostrar todas las entradas
Mostrando entradas con la etiqueta persephone. Mostrar todas las entradas

lunes, 29 de diciembre de 2025

WHO BREAKS A BUTTERFLY UPON A WHEEL?

 The Midnight Archives is a gold mine of tragic stories and dark fairytale retellings - but one of the creepiest is the real-life story of Sporus, Emperor Nero's teenage eunuch "wife!"

Sporus was likely an epithet given to him when his abuse started, considering it to be derived from the Greek word σπόρος (spóros), meaning "seed" or "semen", which may refer to his inability to have children following his castration. Against this popular view, David Woods points out that the name resembles the Latin word spurius of Sabine origin, meaning "illegitimate child"; hence Woods advances the thesis that Nero himself had called the boy Spurius, or that he believed the Greek name Sporus to be related to the Latin word. Little is known about this teenager's short life before he came to the Imperial court and got married to the Emperor to replace the wife he had killed (uxoricide). He may have been a prisoner of war from Greece.

He may have been a puer delicatus. These were sometimes castrated to preserve their youthful qualities (much like an operatic castrato). The puer delicatus generally was a child or teen slave chosen by his master for his beauty and sexual attractiveness.

Nero did a lot of creepy things (except playing the lyre while Rome burned, that's a myth) - assassinating his own mother, "giving birth" to a live frog, but the crowner was marrying a femboy eunuch. Previously he had killed his previous wife Poppea (from whom the French "poupée" for doll may come) by kicking her in the heavily pregnant belly, which made her abort. After which he thought "I need a new wife!" and he saw this cute teenager at his palace...

In 67 AD, he married Sporus, who was said to bear a remarkable resemblance to Poppaea. Nero had Sporus castrated, and during their marriage, Nero had Sporus appear in public as his wife, in drag and makeup, wearing the regalia that was customary for Roman empresses. He then took Sporus to Greece and back to Rome, making Calvia Crispinilla serve as "mistress of the wardrobe" to Sporus, ἐπιτροπεία τὴν περὶ ἐσθῆτα (epitropeía tḕn perì esthêta). Sporus played the role of Nero's wife. Among other forms of address, Sporus was termed "Lady", "Empress", and "Mistress". Suetonius quotes one Roman who lived around this time who remarked that the world would have been better off if Nero's father Ahenobarbus had married someone more like the castrated boy. 

Shortly before Nero's death, during the Calends festival, Sporus presented Nero with a ring bearing a gemstone depicting the Rape of Persephone, in which the ruler of the underworld (Hades) forces a young girl (his own niece) to become his bride. It was at the time considered one of the many bad omens of Nero's fall. This would not be the only time Sporus was cast as Persephone...

Sporus was one of the four companions on the emperor's last journey in June of 68 AD, along with EpaphroditusNeophytus, and Phaon. It was Sporus, and not his wife Messalina, to whom Nero turned as he began the ritual lamentations before taking his own life. Nero's famous last words were: "What a great artist dies with me!"

AFTER NERO'S DEATH

Soon afterward, Sporus was taken to the care of the Praetorian prefect Nymphidius Sabinus, who had persuaded the Praetorian Guards to desert Nero. Nymphidius treated Sporus as a wife and called him "Poppaea". Nymphidius tried to make himself emperor but was killed by his own guardsmen. In 69 AD, Sporus became involved with Otho, the second of a rapid, violent succession of four emperors who vied for power during the chaos that followed Nero's death. Otho had once been married to Poppaea, until Nero had forced their divorce. Otho reigned for three months until his suicide after the Battle of Bedriacum. His victorious rival, Vitellius, the teen's next and last owner, intended to use Sporus as a victim in a public entertainment: a fatal "re-enactment" of the Rape of Persephone at a gladiator show, in which Vitellius would star as Hades and Sporus as Persephone. Sporus avoided this public humiliation by committing suicide.


"Who breaks a butterfly upon a wheel?" is a quotation from Alexander Pope's "Epistle to Dr Arbuthnot" of January 1735.

It alludes to "breaking on the wheel", a form of torture in which victims had their long bones broken by an iron bar while tied to a Catherine wheel.The quotation is used to suggest someone is "employing superabundant effort in the accomplishment of a small matter" (compare "shooting a fly/mosquito with an elephant gun" in modern English). 

The line appears in a section criticizing the courtier John Hervey, 2nd Baron Hervey, who was close to Queen Caroline and was one of Pope's bitterest enemies. The section also refers to accusations of sodomy against Hervey. They were originally made in William Pulteney, 1st Earl of Bath's Proper reply to a late scurrilous libel of 1731, which had led to Hervey challenging Pulteney to a duel. Hervey's decade-long clandestine affair with Stephen Fox would eventually contribute to his downfall. Despite Pope's claims, Hervey should not be considered strictly gay, as he was known to be bisexual.

The line "Who breaks a butterfly upon a wheel?" forms line 308 of the "Epistle to Dr Arbuthnot" in which Alexander Pope responded to his physician's word of caution about making satirical attacks on powerful people by sending him a selection of such attacks. It appears in a section on the courtier John Hervey, 2nd Baron Hervey, who was close to Queen Caroline and was one of Pope's bitterest enemies. The section opens as follows:

Let Sporus tremble –"What? that thing of silk,
Sporus, that mere white curd of ass's milk?
Satire or sense, alas! can Sporus feel?
Who breaks a butterfly upon a wheel?
Yet let me flap this bug with gilded wings,
This painted child of dirt that stinks and stings;
Whose buzz the witty and the fair annoys,
Yet wit ne'er tastes, and beauty ne'er enjoys,

"Sporus", a male slave favoured by Emperor Nero, was castrated by the emperor, and subsequently married. Pope here refers to accusations made in Pulteney's Proper reply to a late scurrilous libel of 1731 which led to Hervey challenging Pulteney to a duel. Hervey's decade-long clandestine affair with Stephen Fox would eventually contribute to his downfall.

"What? that thing of silk" uses a metaphor of a silkworm spinning that Pope had already used in The Dunciad to refer to bad poets. "Ass's (donkey's) milk" was at that time a common tonic, and was part of a diet adopted by Hervey. Pale skin was preferred by the upper class in preindustrial societies, since most commoners (farmers, fishermen, etc.) worked outdoors and were sunburned."This painted child" comments on make-up such as rouge used by the handsome Hervey, and by Sporus himself.

sábado, 9 de diciembre de 2023

ART HISTORY ADVENT CALENDAR - DAY 9

 Week of Love

9th of December - Persephone



I am caught between two loves: I am
my mother's daughter, but also my husband's wife.
I spend half the year with each of them.
I love them both equally,
half a year under the Sun,
half a year in the Underworld.
After all, Mum, when I disappeared
you were worried so sick
that the whole Earth grew cold and barren.
And you, my lord,
though you spirited me away by force
into your dark realm,
I gradually grew to love you as a wife and Queen.
I am forever caught between two worlds:
my mother's daughter, but also my husband's wife.
This is me. Persephone.


miércoles, 6 de diciembre de 2023

ART HISTORY ADVENT CALENDAR - DAY 6

 Week of Love

6th of December - Cupid and Psyche



Once upon a time,

the god of love himself fell in love

with his mother's mortal rival.

Aphrodite would only take Psyche for an in-law

and give her and Cupid her blessing

if the human girl completed a series of labours

(like a female Theseus or Hercules).

Psyche took the wool from fire-breathing rams,

the wool they had left on the thorns.

Zeus' Eagle helped her fill her pitcher

from a waterfall guarded by dragons.

But the last task was the most daunting:

"Descend to the realm of the dead

and bring me a pot of Persephone's beauty cream," 

said Aphrodite, determined.

Psyche geared herself up for the Underworld:

she brought money for Charon to cross the Styx,

a half dozen doggy biscuits for Cerberus

(three for the journey there, three for the return),

and ate nothing that Hades and Persephone gave her

(otherwise she would have stayed in their dark realm).

On the journey home, however,

she was intrigued, as curious as Pandora,

and opened the tiny pot of beauty cream.

Psyche plunged instantly into deep slumber:

the beauty of Persephone is

the beauty of Death itself.

Cupid found out and woke her up

with a true love's kiss,

just like Snow White or Sleeping Beauty.

And Aphrodite was so moved by their love

that she gave the young couple her blessing.

They got married with great pomp on Olympus,

and she got butterfly wings, like he has feathered wings,

so they now can fly together through the skies.

Cupid and Psyche, the Flesh and the Soul,

who needed one another, were united

to live happily ever after.

jueves, 3 de agosto de 2023

EN EL BAILE DE ANNA...

EN EL BAILE DE ANNA...

Dedicado a Ana Garcés Cara

de todo corazón 

Traducción de Sandra Dermark

directamente del húngaro 

el 2 de agosto de MMXXIII

con el sol en Leo y

superluna llena del Esturión en Acuario 

,.............................

En el baile de Anna, 

se oye la música de baile...

y suena la melodía más

dulce por los aires...

Las dos nos sentamos,

ella y yo, en tête-à-tête,

yo no dije ni pío, fue Anna quien

lo dijo todo, ¿eh?

Cuando una anciana zíngara

nos vino a ver,

preguntó a Anna: "¿cuál es 

tu aria, mademoiselle?"

Mas la joven en susurros sólo respondió:

"No hay aria que sea santo de mi devoción"

.....................................

Quien no tiene una canción no tiene corazón,

quien no cree en la canción mira en su corazón,

habrá una criatura cuyo nombre ocultó

y que guarda luto donde, adulte, aún no le vio...

......................

Una vez hubo un gran prodigio, una vez sucedió,

el señorito de la más dulce se prendó,

en calesa la fue a llevar hasta la Catedral...

Nunca hubo en nuestro poblado un enlace igual.

Al palacio de diez cuartos él se la llevó,

los sirvientes, como abejas, iban en derredor,

mas la joven no es feliz, no cesa de llorar,

del jardín no escucha la tonada del hogar...

...........................

Quien no tiene una canción no tiene corazón,

quien no cree en la canción mira en su corazón,

habrá una criatura cuyo nombre ocultó

y que guarda luto donde, adulte, aún no le vio...

,..................................

Me fui lejos para todo ese trauma olvidar,

me detuve a decir adiós frente al hostal,

miré adentro, mas ¿qué vi en aquel interior?

Una joven castaña que en el piano lo tocó...

...........................

Quien no tiene una canción no tiene corazón,

quien no cree en la canción mira en su corazón,

habrá una criatura cuyo nombre ocultó

y que guarda luto donde, adulte, aún no le vio...

,..................................

Quien no tiene una canción no tiene corazón,

quien no cree en la canción mira en su corazón,

habrá una criatura cuyo nombre ocultó

y que guarda luto donde, adulte, aún no le vio...

,..................................


domingo, 10 de marzo de 2019

Variations on Coming of Age Fairy Tales

"What Her Mother Said" by Theodora Goss


Go, my child, through the forest
To your grandmother's house, in a glade
Where poppies with red mouths grow.

In this basket is an egg laid
Three days ago,
The three days our Lord lay sleeping,
Unspotted, from a white hen.
In this basket is also a skein,
Of wool, without stain,
Unspun. And a comb that the bees
Industriously filled
From the clover in the far pasture,
Unmown since the sun
Thawed it, last Spring.

If you can take it without breaking
Anything, I will give you
This ring.

Stay, child, and I'll give you this cap
To wear, so the forest creatures whose eyes
Blink from the undergrowth will be aware
That my love protects you. The creatures
Lurking beneath the trees,
Weasels and stoats and foxes, and worse
Than these.

And child, you must be wise
In the forest.

When the wolf finds you, remember:
Be courteous, but evasive. No answer
Is better than a foolish one.

If you stray from the path, know
That I strayed also. It is no great matter,
So long as you mark the signs:
Where moss grows on bark, where a robin
Builds her nest. The sun
Sailing west.

But do not stop to gather
The hawthorn flowers, nor yet
The red berries which so resemble
Coral beads. They are poisonous.
And do not stop to listen
To the reeds.

He must not be there first,
At your grandmother's house.

And when your grandmother serves you,
With a silver spoon, on a dish
Like a porcelain moon, Wolf Soup,
Remember to say your grace
Before you eat.

And know that I am pleased,
With you, my child.

But remember, when returning through the forest,
Kept warm against the night by a cloak
Of the wolf's pelt:
The hunter is also a wolf.


****************************************************

Persephone in Hades

Poppies have never been my favorite flowers.
Here they bloom all year long, if one can say
a year in Hades, where no seasons pass,
where summer never fades. Ironic, that—
a land of death where nothing ever dies.
I have almost forgotten how it feels
when snowflakes fall and melt against my cheeks,
when frost spreads her white veil across the landscape,
covering the hills, decorating the leaves
that rattle on the trees with intricate lace.
I miss that time of year when autumn fires
bloom in the household hearths. Here, no fires burn.
Instead, among the wheat, the poppies sway:
an endless field to drug men into sleep,
relieve their pains or worries for a while,
here, in this silent land where all are welcome.
As silent as my husband, Hades himself,
who sits all day in his library reading scrolls
lost to the world above us. “Why did you bring me
to this stagnant country,” I ask him, “if not to talk?
To sit and brood in a chair made out of bones,
or stare out the window at the unchanging garden,
in which only yew trees grow, and never speak?
Why abduct the daughter of Demeter?
Why not some other girl?” He shakes his head
and sighs. He would be handsome, if not so lost
in his own dreams. Or if he would trim his beard.
“I saw your hair lift in the wind,” he says,
“and thought of it blowing back against my face,
but there is no wind down here. I saw your mouth
and thought perhaps it would kiss me, or whisper poems
into my ears. Perhaps then I’d wake up
from this endless sleep, this abyss of timelessness.
I thought you might love me in time, forgetting that love
cannot live in this land.” He looks at me, frowning.
“You’ll never love me, will you, Persephone?”
“Not,” I say, “as long as you keep me here,
while above us frost and snow blanket the earth—
away from death, among the endless dead.”
“Yet how can I let you go?” His eyes plead with me,
I suppose to be forgiven or understood,
but I turn away, unsympathetic. He should
know better: you cannot have love on such terms.
Even the gods, selfish as children, know that.
It is useless, here, to count the days, and yet
a day will come, a day without a dawn,
when I will feel that ache within my chest,
as though a string were tied around my heart,
and know, with crocuses and hyacinths,
it’s time to push my way through the dark soil
into the sunlight, into my mother’s arms.
It’s time to blossom like the olive trees,
be born again into mortality
for a little while, laugh and shake water drops
from my hair, dance across the sunlit meadows
sprinkled with daisies and cornflowers, forget the land
of death and poppies, at least for a little while.
To forget, for a little while, the silent husband
who waits implacably at summer’s end.

*************************************************

Snow, Blood, Fur

She looks at herself in the full-length mirror of the bridal salon. She resembles a winter landscape, hills and hollows covered with snow, white and sparkling. She is the essence of purity, as though all that has ever blown through her is a chill wind. The veil falls and falls to her feet. She shivers.
"Are you cold, Rosie?" her mother asks.
She shakes her head, but she is cold, or rather she is Cold, a Snow Queen. If she breathed on the mirror, it would frost.
"Well, you look beautiful. Just beautiful. Nana would have been so proud."
When she gets home, she goes up to her bedroom and opens the closet door. In one corner, in a wooden toy box she has kept from her childhood, is the wolf skin. She puts it on, draping it around her shoulders, then steps into the closet, pulls the door closed behind her, and sits down beside a parade of high-heeled shoes.
It is dark, as dark as she imagines it must have been in the belly of the wolf.
Sometimes she still has nightmares.
She is walking through the forest. Pine needles and oak leaves crunch under her boots. Once in a while, blackberry bushes pull at her dress so she has to stop and untangle the canes. She is wearing the red cloak her grandmother knit and felted. In it, she looks like a Swiss girl, demure, flaxen-haired: a Christmas angel. Her grandmother gave it to her for her sixteenth birthday.
Suddenly, on the path ahead of her is the wolf. Dark fur, slavering red mouth. Sharp, pricked ears, yellow eyes as wild as undiscovered countries. Or it is a young man, a hunter by his clothing. He has a tweed cap on his head with a feather in it, and is carrying a rifle. When he sees her, he bows, although she cannot tell if he is serious or mocking.
"Aren't you afraid of the wolf, Mistress Rose? He has been seen in this forest. Perhaps I should escort you, wherever you might be going."
In her basket is a bottle of blackberry cordial, a small cake with currants. She is taking them to her grandmother, who has rheumatism. She has been told to beware wolves... and young men.
****************************************************
Her Mother's Ghosts
Her name is Ilona. The other children at school call her Smellona. She is not me, but I have been her. Here are the things I remember most clearly:

She lives in a townhouse in Washington D.C. with her mother and younger brother, whose bangs are always cut crooked. It is the seventies. She and her brother wear clothes they will later call hideous in photographs, but now, today, they are not hideous, because brown is still a respectable color. They are playing under the cherry trees. The blossoms are everywhere, lying on the asphalt in heaps like pink snow.
In the kitchen drawer are silver spoons, smuggled in socks, the sleeves of pajamas. They are heavy, dulled with use. They are older than her mother, her grandmother. One is much worse for having slipped into the garbage disposal. In the kitchen cabinet are margarine tubs, more than ten, perhaps more than twenty, washed clean, ready in case the world runs out of margarine tubs. Don't laugh. It could happen.

Since Ilona turned seven, she has been haunted by her mother's ghosts. Once, late at night, she saw a train conductor coming out of the bathroom.
"Do you have your visa?" he asked her.
She shook her head. She was in a pink nightgown, and her feet were bare. The floor was cold.
"Then you can't cross the border," he said, looking down at her sternly. "You'll have to get out here, and speak to the station master."
She nodded. She really needed to go to the bathroom, but she was afraid that if she tried to slip past him, he would grab her. Then she would scream, and her mother would wake up. She would have to explain that she had had a nightmare. She could never tell her mother that she had seen her ghosts.
Once, when she was sitting at the kitchen table doing her homework, a man in a green plaid suit said to her, "You can't go to medical school. You're not qualified."
She stared at his tie, which had a pattern of wheat sheaves and small tractors. His neck turned red. Above his mustache, his cheeks and nose also turned red.
"Why haven't you joined the Party?" he asked with barely suppressed rage. She had not known that a question could sound so angry. She was afraid he was going to slap her.
After he disappeared, she could not think about her homework. Instead, she went out to the back garden and sat on the bricks, staring at the ivy that grew up the sides of the house. Sometimes sparrows built nests there, among the leaves, and in the mornings, especially, the ivy cheeped and stirred. Last spring, one of the stray cats had brought a baby sparrow in to breakfast and laid it down on the linoleum, like a gift.

At first she thought the stray cats were ghosts. They came in the evenings and sat on the bricks in the back garden. She would take them up to her bedroom. After they had stayed in her bedroom for three days, living on milk and chicken left over from the paprikás, they were allowed to stay.
Sometimes they disappeared as mysteriously as they had come. These, she decided, where ghost cats from the streets of Budapest. But others stayed, and during her childhood there were more and more cats, sitting on the sofa, scratching the legs of the dining room table, curling beside her when she slept at night, one on her feet, one at her side, one with his chin on her shoulder, purring into her ear. In the middle of the night, he liked to pull her hair with his claws. She would wake up, and that was when, more often than not, she would see the ghosts.

At first, she thought the voice on the telephone was a ghost. "Traitor!" it said. "We're coming to take your children. Why did you leave your parents? They miss you, your husband misses you. We'll put you in prison, with rats, and sewer water seeping over the floor!"
Soon after, they moved to the country. Her brother began a series of collections: stones from the streambed, insects, a selection of rusted nails. He kept them in shoe boxes, in his closet. The insects crawled out. Spiders began to spin webs in the corners of his room. Sometimes they would eat dinner with fireflies crawling over the ceiling. The stray cats kept leaving half-eaten caterpillars on the stairs.

More than once, Ilona saw her grandmother, an old woman with short gray hair and delicate wrists. As a girl, she had studied art. Later, she had been forbidden to sell her paintings. They arrived at holidays wrapped around boxes of chocolates. Her mother hung them in every room of the house, even the bathroom. If you stood close, you could still see creases where her mother had ironed the folds.
She always appeared as a thin wash, like one of her watercolors of the light over Lake Balaton. Through her, Ilona could see the banister, the dining room table, the swing hanging from an oak tree in the garden.
Once, she thought she saw her father standing by the oak tree. He was wearing a uniform, like the train conductor but with a red star on his cap. She thought he looked handsome, but he vanished quickly.

There is something I have forgotten to tell you. When she was twelve and still living in Washington D.C., day after day for a period of three months she saw tanks driving down the streets. On her way to school, on her way to the dentist. During these months, she could not sleep. She threw up everything but a slice of birthday cake at a party for a girl from school. She lost weight and developed dark circles under her eyes. Her mother took her to the doctor. She began to believe she was turning into a ghost.

You are angry with me. You say, this is not a story. It is merely a series of scenes, and of manufactured scenes at that. Your name is not Ilona. You never saw your mother's ghosts.
And of course you are right. When Ilona was seventeen, her mother died of breast cancer. After that, she never saw ghosts. Her brother grew up to be a famous entomologist. He is now a professor at Harvard. She grew up to be a writer, but not of stories. She writes about art, and sometimes architecture. She would never write this story, so I am writing it for her.
My mother did not die. Last year, she finished law school. My brother, a computer programmer, went to her graduation. They live by the ocean in California, where it is always sunny.
I rarely see them. I am haunted by ghosts, invisible, impalpable: the ghosts of silver spoons and margarine tubs, the smell of paprikás cooking on Sunday afternoons. The ghost of a country.
Sometimes, in my Boston apartment, I see her: the ghost of my mother, walking along the hallway, running her fingers over the piano. I see her from the back, wearing a dress with light blue and white checks. She made us both dresses out of that fabric, in Brussels. Once, a policeman stopped to ask me, with a wink, if I liked taking walks with my older sister.
When I see her, she is always walking away from me. And her back tells me, some things you can't understand, even by writing about them.


jueves, 10 de enero de 2019

The Blood of Salmacis

Title: The Blood of Salmacis
Pairing/characters: Hermaphroditus, Thanatos
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: Inspired by the story of Hermaphroditus in Ovid's Metamorphoses
Prompt: 546. Mythology - Greek: Hermaphroditus. How does his assimiliation with the nymph immediately affect him and his sexuality?
Summary: After Hermaphroditus pronounces his curse.




The boy, thus lost in woman, now survey'd
The river's guilty stream, and thus he pray'd.
(He pray'd, but wonder'd at his softer tone,
Surpriz'd to hear a voice but half his own.)
You parent-Gods, whose heav'nly names I bear,
Hear your Hermaphrodite, and grant my pray'r;
Oh grant, that whomsoe'er these streams contain,
If man he enter'd, he may rise again
Supple, unsinew'd, and but half a man!


- Metamorphoses by Ovid, Book IV, The Story of Salmacis and Hermaphroditus, translated by Sir Samuel Garth, John Dryden, et. al.


THE BLOOD OF SALMACIS


The surface of the spring warped and writhed. In the shallows, it surged in too-ambitious waves, mud spattering the hands that tore at its edge. There was a red shadow in the water.

He had cried his voice out, screaming his curse. He had. She had. Would he, she, it now have to –

Gasping deeply, he bowed over the wild water, breathing in the heat of it. He. His mind was still there, unchanged, even if the water now obeyed him.

He knelt on the sand at the edge of the spring. The water covered his hands. The naiads had always told him he had beautiful hands, but now the bones no longer showed. Softer. Female.

He flexed his fingers and watched the knuckles appear.

The naiads... the naiads would laugh at him. Hermes would not care, but then he never did; his father had thoughts as flighty as his feet. And his mother.

Hermaphroditus let the surface of the water calm and smooth. His reflection stilled from a monster to something – not unlike him. More of his mother's face, Aphrodite Cytherea's kindness that he'd always seen. Cytherea held the key to male and female. Perhaps his mother-

No. She had touched the spring, putting his curse to work. She had not unwound the nymph's body from his own, undone this monstrosity.

The water surged again between his fingers. He was not a god. He had almost drowned, fighting off the nymph, before she'd cursed him, melted into him, consumed him. If he let the water flow within him too, it would end.

The water darted higher and higher, spattering his lips. It had been Salmacis' spring. Salmacis was lost in him, a malign mutation, a shadow in his-her-its body (but not his mind, and he clung to it, the gratitude a flame). The spring was his. Its. Theirs.

He followed the movement of the water with his hands. The waves were like Cytherea's sea, darting, knowing. Over his knees, scraped in the fight. To the sides. To his left, a tongue of liquid lapping against pale fingers.

There was a man crouched at the water's edge, some years Hermaphroditus' senior and pale as a bloodless body. The hem of the short black chiton was stained with the mud of the spring bank. Long black locks half-obscured the man's face, but not the dark eyes that cut so deeply apart from the paleness of the skin. Pale as the children of the Night, Hermaphroditus thought, and then he knew who his visitor was.

Hermaphroditus had no wonder nor horror left in him. "Greetings to you who are death," he said. The voice was too high, too soft. The naiads would laugh. "How fares my mother's sister?"

Thanatos inclined his head. "The Lady of the Dead fares well. How fare you?"

Hermaphroditus laughed, choked, hid his face against the water and the mud until he could breathe again. It felt strange. His chest was narrower, different-shaped.

He chanced a look up, and almost laughed again. "It's – an inefficient way of drowning?"

"I've seen worse." Death spoke in a pleasant voice, each word separate and rounded. Like someone who read books and talked to philosophers.

Hermaphroditus thought he shouldn't be thinking like that about a child of Chaos. Like an Olympian, higher than everyone. He'd never been to Olympus.

He took a breath. The words escaped with the exhalation. "Are you here for me?"

Thanatos' lips moved a fraction, and Hermaphroditus drew another breath. He was not a god. Only a demigod. He had been raised by nymphs, without ambrosia, without eternal youth while he still had his own to live through. He could die.

"Salmacis," Thanatos said.

Hermaphroditus caught his own face, pressing on the jaw, forehead, smaller, hers.

Thanatos' eyes followed the path of Hermaphroditus' fingers. "She was not as gracious."

"No." Hermaphroditus heard himself smiling. "No, she wasn't."

The wind caught his words, carrying them over the surface of the pool. The air was cool on his skin. A strand of Thanatos' hair shaped into a curl, anchored behind an ear, then escaped and cut across the pale forehead.

"Can I die?" Hermaphroditus asked. "Now?"

Two fingers caught the strand, setting it back in the wave of Thanatos' hair. "Everyone can die."

"If they want to." Hermaphroditus smiled, lowering his head. "I'm sorry. I-"

"Complete other people's sentences?" For the first time, Thanatos' voice was more than neutral, colouring towards amusement.

"Don't make me laugh," Hermaphroditus said. "I don't think I'd be able to stop."

Thanatos shifted, sitting down on the edge of the pool, long legs stretched over the water.

Hermaphroditus sat back on his heels. "What would it be like? The Realm of Hades? Elysium? Is it dark?"

"Not where the souls walk." Thanatos turned his head to the side, the strand of hair falling free again. "They walk through fields of endless grain, under an eternal sun."

"Never changing?"

"Never."

Hermaphroditus looked down on the water. "I wanted to see more."

Thanatos flicked a finger, sending a lump of dirt into the water. For a moment, it became a dark stain. Then it was gone.

"I wanted to see what the human world look like," Hermaphroditus said. "I wanted to walk in a marketplace. I don't know if I'd make a soldier, but I could walk with an army. Carry messages, like my father." He spread his fingers again, soft like a child's. At fifteen, he'd been a boy. "I wanted to be a man."

"Men die," Thanatos said.

"I'd like to have the choice." Hermaphroditus reached out, showing Thanatos his too-round arms. "It feels wrong. It's not who I am."

"It limits you," the one who was death agreed. "You will never father a child, nor give birth to one."

Hermaphroditus lowered his head. "I did not think as far ahead. I – my parents are gods, Olympians. I have no name that must be carried on."

"A limitation?"

"A freedom." Hermaphroditus smiled ruefully. "One less thing for me to worry about?"

Thanatos regarded him with dark eyes. Hermaphroditus had seen Hypnos once, from a distance, and the eyes of the twins were the same, star-scattered. He supposed it was Thanatos who had had them first, first-born and leader.

"I never fit," he said suddenly. "I mean, my parents are both Olympians. I should be one. But I don't have power, and I've never been to Olympus. I was raised by nymphs. I don't know anything else."

Thanatos' hand lifted, shaping the outside of Hermaphroditus' arm. He had not noticed when the one who was death had come so close.

"There is much you don't know," Thanatos said. "This is simply another item on your list."

"So what should I do?" Hermaphroditus asked. Death was malicious, he remembered. Death was cruel, and merciless, and destructive.

Death was taking his hand.

"You should learn," Thanatos said. "Until then, you cannot decide."

Hermaphroditus blinked sudden dryness out of his eyes. "Learn what?"

"What it means to be you." There was a tint of a smile in the shadows under Death's cheeks. "Then I shall see you again."

Hermaphroditus moved his fingers along Thanatos' palm. There were no calluses, though the skin was not smooth.

"I don't think I'll like eternal grain." He thought he saw the smile appear truly. "And don't laugh at me."

"I am death," Thanatos said. "I can laugh at what I please."

"Don't."

Thanatos' fingers moved, squeezing Hermaphroditus' wrist.

"I'll learn," Hermaphroditus said. "I didn't choose this, but I choose to learn about it." His lips trembled. "I don't think I would have had children, anyway."

"Wouldn't you?" For a moment, the stars in death's eyes brightened.

Hermaphroditus smiled, bowing his head until his hair fell over his eyes. His hair, blond like his mother's. He wondered if he would see her again, or if it had been the last time she touched his heart, when she had answered his call to curse Salmacis' spring and bring his doom upon all men who bathed in it. If he could not have his gender, why should they?

He laughed, then stopped suddenly. "It was a dream, wasn't it? Trying to be like others. No-one can be the same as others."

"It was not a bad dream."

"It was not a true dream." Hermaphroditus brought Thanatos' fingers to his lips. Death's skin tasted of ashes. "Time to wake up."

He rose to his knees, then to his feet. He walked into the water, which parted for him, for the child of Aphrodite Cytherea, merged with the nymph the spring had birthed.

Thanatos watched him leave. Then he dipped his hand in the water and watched the blood of the nymph stain it and dissipate in it.

Hermaphroditus' curse would bring him often to this shore.

τέλος

lunes, 24 de julio de 2017

A BODY AT REST



The man was staring at her again. Riva stood at the sink washing dishes and saw him standing in the shade of the trees outside the kitchen window.

“Mum,” she said.

“What now?” asked her mother, chopping vegetables for stew.

“Nothing,” Riva said after a pause. Her mother came up behind her and peered over her shoulder. The man was standing there and staring at Riva, but her mother’s eyes scanned the scene without pausing. After a moment, her mother went back to her chopping.

“Don’t bother me over nothing,” she said.

“Yes, Mum.”

On laundry day at the end of the week, the two of them were outside scrubbing linens with water hauled up from the stream, heated in a pot over the fire and poured into the wash basins. Her mother had gone inside, and Riva was just hanging up the last wet sheet when she lost her grip and the end whipped past her face. Looking beyond it, she saw the man standing not ten feet from her.

She froze, her hands outstretched still to tangle with the unwieldy sheet. He smiled; his teeth were glaring white.

Her mouth was open to say something, but the sheet whipped back around in the breeze and slapped her across the face. As she grabbed ahold of it, she knew before she lowered it that he would have disappeared.

She left her empty basket where it lay and walked towards the woods. Although she knew enough about husbandry to distinguish a poisonous plant from a useful one, she didn’t recognize the flower she found in the place where the man had been standing. She knelt down by the plant, hesitating at the thorns twined about its stem. The scent of the bloom was strange and intoxicating, and she found herself grabbing the flower and ripping it from its nest of leaves. As she did so, one of the thorns pricked her, so that a single drop of blood fell to the earth. She put the wound to her mouth and sucked on it. The taste was bitter on her tongue, leaving an uneasy feeling behind.

Still, she carried the flower inside the house with her. That night, she placed it under her pillow and slept with its sweet fragrance drifting around her. Her dreams were vivid and troubling, but forgotten upon waking.

In the morning, the temperature dropped dramatically as it sometimes did in the middle of spring. She wore her petticoats doubled and her thickest woolen cloak when she went to fetch water from the stream. After the chores were done, her mother declared she was setting off for town.

“I won’t be long,” she warned her daughter.

Riva knew she should complete the list of chores her mother had given her, but instead she retrieved the flower from under her pillow. Holding it in one hand, she walked into the woods where she had last seen the man.

Her bare feet seemed guided by Providence, and she avoided rocks and sharp twigs with ease. She pulled her cloak tightly around her and her breath frosted the air around her.

When she broke through into a small clearing, the sudden touch of sunlight on her head woke her up. She turned to look behind her, but the trees crowded at her back and their intertwined branches seemed impenetrable. Fear shivered through her.

“Riva,” said a voice. It was lilting, reminding her of the folk songs patterned after the staccato of falling rain. She turned her head and there he was in the bright sun with her, a million jewels of light glinting in his midnight hair. He held a hand out to her and she reached out her own fingers, noticing only at the last moment that she had extended her arm with the hand holding the flower. He smiled and grasped her hand, flower and all, and the petals were crushed between their two palms.

She felt a flicker of pain--thorns, piercing her skin. It failed to wake her from the trance of the man’s touch. Something on the edge of her thoughts hinted about the dreams of the night before, but the memory did not come fully forward. She closed her eyes against the brilliance of the day.

With his hand, he drew her closer. The light flickered against her eyelids.

There was movement and sensation, both overwhelming. Then the night descended, a darkness covering everything with its touch.

#

Riva opened her eyes, and the world was soft-edged and overlapped by shadows. She pushed against the ground, and her bones snicked and clacked in a painful manner. Although she managed to draw herself upwards, tendon and sinew protested every action. As her head lifted from the ground, there was a slithering sound like a hundred snakes, and she looked at the grass and saw a rushing towards her of… something. A weight pulled against her head and she realized the endless coils were attached to her, a nest of hair entwined in the groundcover of the clearing. Her hair, endless loops and curls, tight and painful on her scalp. Her neck strained, but she managed to pull herself up eventually and found herself sitting upright in the center of a sea of tarnished yellow.

Even so simple a move exhausted her. She sat still for a while, noting the trees ringing the space where she was. The clearing was much as she remembered it, but the day was warm now and her rucked-up petticoats too hot.

A voice interrupted her wandering thoughts. Just her name. She turned her head and the dark-haired man appeared in her line of vision.

Her mouth was dry and her tongue fumbled as she tried to make sounds. “Hush,” said the man and she found herself closing her mouth.

A youth stepped out from the trees and stopped next to the man. He was in that awkward stage consisting of doorknob-shaped elbows and knees, limbs stretched thinly between the knobby joints. There was something strange about the boy, but the light was poor and she couldn’t see him well in the growing darkness.

The man bowed once, a courtly gesture that seemed oddly natural in the clearing. Then he faded backwards. She blinked and there was only a hollow space where he had been. The boy remained behind, staring at her.

“H-help,” she croaked. The boy’s eyes darted up to the crown of her head and he drew a knife from his pocket, frightening her for just one moment--until he knelt beside her and sawed at the strands trapping her to the ground. By the time he was finished, it was full dark and the moon had not yet appeared.

Too dark to go anywhere, she thought. The boy watched her--she could see his eyes gleaming in the dark, like a cat’s eyes reflecting and amplifying the dim light of the stars.

She tried to say, “Sit,” but her voice failed her. Still, he seemed to understand, for he sank to the ground next to her.

Although she had done nothing so far, weariness filled her. She didn’t try to speak again, simply lay back into the hollow where she had woken, a curious bare patch of earth sunken slightly into the ground. Curling up, she pillowed her head on her crossed hands and fell asleep.
#

Light woke her, or perhaps the sound of birds trilling softly nearby. She turned her head and saw the boy. He was upright and watching her, as if he hadn’t moved all night. His gaze felt like ants creeping on her skin, and she shivered in the warm light of the dawn. The sun was behind him, but she could see enough to notice there was something wrong with his eyes--one was pale as cheese, the other a dark black. Instead of giving him a quizzical look as one might expect, it made him seem dangerous, as if he were a wild beast come to stare at her, considering whether or not to take her for a meal.

Her mouth was still dry, but she found that she could speak. “Let’s go home.”

The boy said nothing, but he stood when she stood and followed her out of the clearing. She headed south, the woods familiar to her, the trees like old friends who nodded gently as she passed them. Eventually, she noticed a large tumble of boulders she knew was near to her house. With a glad cry, she turned slightly to orient herself and began to walk more quickly. When she came to the stream, she knelt to drink. Hunger was nothing new to her, so she ignored the grumbling in her stomach that accompanied the weight of the liquid in it. Instead, she turned her head and saw the boy kneeling beside her and scooping up the water to drink.

The action was so normal that she relaxed. She wondered why he was with her, why the man had led him to her. But more than her curiosity about him was a homesickness that clogged her throat and stopped her from asking. He followed her without protest as she stood and moved off along the bank of the stream.

She’d been thinking her own thoughts, letting her feet choose their way for a while before she realized they should’ve already broken free from the trees and into the clearing where she lived with her mother. Perhaps she’d been so caught up in her thoughts that she hadn’t seen it? However, if they continued on, they would eventually reach the village. She often made toys for the children there, carved out of bits of deadfall from the forest. The mothers were fond of her; perhaps they would give the two of them something to eat and find a place for the strange boy.

They walked on, the stream gurgling beside them. Each moment, she kept thinking they would come out of the trees and see the village. Her legs were tired, her stomach clenching with hunger. Perhaps now, she thought, again and again.

Her heart thudded in her chest when she realized the light was fading. They had been walking for hours. She sank down to her knees and was suddenly angry when the boy squatted beside her. What could he know about disappearing houses, vanishing towns? The stream was the same, she was sure of it. But her home was gone, and the village also.

Pain lanced through her middle. “I’m so hungry,” she whispered.

The boy stood up and walked away. She watched dully as he disappeared between one tree and the next. The comfort she had found in the forest at the beginning of the day disappeared beneath a sharp stab of fear. A night bird screamed in the distance and her breath hitched.

She waited as the shadows deepened. The texture of the night was muffled under the trees, the darkness closing down over her head and pressing against her sodden heart. Perhaps she would have cried, but she felt too exhausted to try. Instead, she sat on the cool ground, numb and unsleeping.

Movement in the woods, and her heart knocked against her throat. She didn’t recognize the boy until he stood right before her, for he was a shapeless figure in the deeper shadow of the trees. He held something out to her, but she couldn’t tell what it was until her hands dropped beneath the weight of his offering. It was a hare, neck flopping against her hands.

She placed the offering on the ground beside her--nothing to be done with it in the dark. “Thank you,” she said softly. The boy sat down beside her. Eventually, between one breath and the next, her head fell forward and she slept.

 She woke with a sharp pain in her neck when she moved it. “A bed,” she murmured. “A quilt. Food…” And then she remembered the hare.

They had nothing to make a fire. She skinned the creature with the boy’s knife and they ate what she could scrape off its lean bones. Afterwards, she washed the blood off her hands in the stream and took a long drink before they continued on their way.

She no longer knew where to go. But there was no reason to stop. So she walked on, and the boy followed.

On the third day, it rained. Her dress was filthy from travel and ragged from scraping against tree branches. The cloth stuck to her skin and she felt even dirtier than before because of the heat and wet. “Ugh,” Riva said to the boy. “I wish we could--”

A crack of thunder interrupted her words, and she couldn’t breathe. She tried to say something, anything, but found the world had frozen around her. The ground reached out and smacked her in the back of the head, which made the pain in her chest even worse. If she had any breath, she would have cried out. But it seemed she could not speak.

The boy bent over her. His hands were on her face and she saw he was moving his mouth. She wanted to laugh--here she was, speechless, and him trying to say something. A reversal.

“Mother,” she heard him say in a voice like a lilting song. His fingers caressed her face and the look in those strange eyes made her heart pause. Weary, she closed her eyes.
#

The hunter came out of the woods and his gun dropped from his fingers. He covered his mouth with one hand. There, a teenage boy bent over an old woman on the ground. Her chest was red and wet, like a gaping mouth.

The boy turned his head toward the intruder on the scene, and the hunter stopped with his phone halfway out of his pocket. He had been about to call 9-9-9, but there was something off about the boy, something that gave him pause. The boy’s great eyes blinked at the hunter and the man heard, unbelievably, an animal growl rising from that thin chest. He half-turned back to reach for his gun.

He never made it. Many years later, the gun was found by a child playing by the water, who stared at it curiously. Grown round by vines and carried up the trunk of a tree, the ancient rifle pointed straight upwards, mute testament to an outmoded practice. Guns were now irrelevant, a strange thing of the past. But the rifle stood sentinel still, as if to shoot at the blue, blue sky of heaven.

Alison McBain has over 40 publications in magazines and anthologies, including Flash Fiction OnlineAbyss & Apex, Bards and Sages Quarterly and Frozen Fairy Tales.