WHAT'S THIS? 30YW VERSION

Since I did the Othello filk of What's This, I felt that I must do more filks.
More filks mean more of my 10000 times to greatness.
So here is the 30YW version of What's This, which I had thought of writing down as soon as the Othello one was penned. This filk takes place three years ago, when my interest in the 30YW was sparked:

What's this? 
What's this?
Like some religious war?
What's this?
I've heard of this before!
What's this?
I can't believe my eyes, I must be dreaming...
Watch out, Sandra, there'll be gore!
What's this? 

What's this?
What's this?
The Kaiser's got an urge...
What urge?
The realm of Prots to purge!
Oh no!
To reassert the primacy
of Austria and the Habsburgs,
he will slay every non-Catholic!
What is this?
What's this?

There's wealthy upstart Wallenstein, and veteran Count Tilly,
both fighting for command, they do not share much bonhomie...
Now Albrecht just got laid off... Oh, I can't believe my eyes!
And plans worthy of Tywin Lannister he'll now devise...

Oh look! Who's this?
The dashing King of Swedes!
A kiss?
He'll bring his queen to war!
To fight!
Finally, we've seen the heroes of this story,
Gustavus and Eleanor!

What's this?
Right now,
now lands the Swedish fleet!
Good cheer!
I hope there's change and things...
And why?
Now Gustavus parleys with the electors for a while...
Magdeburg is overrun,
then they claim Leipzig, Saxony...
Tilly loses at Breitenfeld!
This looks like fun, this looks like fun!
I was right to bet on the Swedes!
What's this?

Oh my!
What now?
It's winter, wait till spring!
It's spring!
They've got to cross the Lech!
They cross!
Now Count Tilly's despairing,
says his prayers, his flag he's bearing,
Oh, how daring! Yet his right leg's been shot off and now he's
dying...
What's this?

Now Wallenstein is back, Gustavus fights his first defeat...
I don't know if the Swedes will ever this freethinker beat!
Amidst the fog of Lützen, I hear gunshots in the air!
They cross the fields at twilight, and the fallen King lies there!

The sights! The sounds!
They're everywhere and all
around!
I've never felt so good
before!
This empty place inside of me is filling up...
I simply cannot get enough...
I want it! Oh, I want it!
Oh, I want it for my own!
I've got to know, I've got to know what is this war that I have found!
What... is... this?

The Thirty Years' War?