THE LADY EDITOR AND HER FIANCÉ (TSQ-IV IN THE WIZARDING WORLD)

By hannahsoapy 

Fourth story, the Lady Editor and her fiancé

“In the land we are now in there lives a wonderful Lady who lives in a castle, and she is called the Editor. She is extraordinarily clever, because she has read all the articles in the world and forgotten them again – that is how very clever she is! Lately, she was humming a song that went like this: ‘oh, why should I not be married?’ 

 

‘That is a song not without its meaning,’ the Lady Editor decided, and then she was determined to be married, but she wanted a husband who was good to talk to, and not one who was only pretty, for that is very boring and tiresome. So, she gathered up all of her writers and she told them what she wished, and they were all delighted.”

 “Well, the next magazine went out with hearts on all the borders, and an invitation to all men who wished to come to the castle and speak to the Lady Editor, and whoever she felt spoke best she would marry. There was an excellent response to the advert – I could not keep track of how many men came, but it was at least twice as many the number of claws I have! But none of them impressed the Lady Editor; they all talked well enough outside, but as soon as they got inside all they could do was repeat the last word the Lady Editor said, and to hear that again was not very interesting.”

“The third day after the advert had gone out, a man came walking up – not by Apparition or Portkey like the others – and he had bright shiny eyes, beautiful long hair, and shabby clothes.”

He was not abashed or intimidated by the suitors that were lounging about; he merely nodded at them and went right in, boldly going right up to the Lady Editor at her copy machine.”

 

“And did he get the Lady Editor?” 

He was courteous and spoke very well, and in fact had not known of the advert at all, having only come to seek the Lady Editor’s wisdom. She pleased him, and he pleased her.”

 to the residence of the Lady Editor, but when it was in view ... it was not so much a castle as a large stone building shaped like a rook, which she supposed ... might indeed look a bit like a castle. (THE LADY EDITOR IS LUNA!! WHO IS HER FIANCÉ?)

Surrounding the house was a dilapidated, but somehow charming fence made of wooden rails, and Victoire observed all sorts of odd and unique plants within the garden.

There were two signs tacked onto the gate, and once she was close enough, Victoire could make out that they said: ‘Editor of the Quibbler – L. Lovegood’ and ‘Pick Your Own Mistletoe.’

 

Well, Victoire had no idea what mistletoe had to do with anything, but she did recognize the Quibbler, and the name Lovegood. She had met Luna Lovegood on several occasions, but did not recall her very well, or remember whether or not she was a magazine editor.

Victoire took a deep breath and opened the gate, and then strode as quickly as she could up the little path to the door, and firmly rapped her knuckles against it before she could think twice. The door was opened promptly, and on the other side of it stood a man with sandy brown hair and freckled, tanned skin, with clothes rumpled from his midafternoon nap, and holding a teapot.

 The man was rather befuddled by this answer, and so he did the only thing he could think to do, which was invite her inside and get her seated on the sofa with a cup of tea. Then he sat in an armchair and they sat both sipping their tea silently and feeling very awkward.

 

“Victoire!” a voice cried from behind in delight, “I knew you’d be here soon!”

 

Victoire nearly spilt her tea, she turned so quickly, and who was there but Luna Lovegood! Her hair was tied up in a colorful kerchief, and her overalls and shirt were covered in paint stains, and she beamed brightly at Victoire.

 “You knew I was coming?” Victoire asked, puzzled. 

 

“Well, of course,” Luna said, “your name was on the calendar.” She gestured at a large calendar tacked to the wall, and Victoire saw that on today’s date, written in sparkly rainbow ink, it said, ‘Victoire – afternoon tea’.

 

“If you’re Victoire,” said the man in the armchair, “who’s Teddy?”

 

“Victoire, meet Rolf,” Luna said, waving a hand at the man, “he is my betrothed.”

 

Rolf smiled, and turned quite pink.

 

“Teddy is my – he’s my best friend,” Victoire told him. “He went out on his sledge and disappeared last Yule.”

 

“Oh no, that won’t do,” Luna cried, moving to sit next to Victoire on the sofa. “We must hear the whole story, or else how will we help you look for him?”

 

“You’re going to help me?” Victoire was surprised, because Luna was a grownup, and she had thought for certain that she would be sent back home right away, and not be allowed to go on searching for Teddy. She had set out on her journey unintentionally, but now was determined to see it through.

 

“I think that you are the only one who can find him,” Luna told her, with all the seriousness of a prophecy. Victoire gulped and began her story right away.

 

She did as she was asked and started right at the beginning, leaving no part out, and when she was done Luna looked thoughtful.

 

“You must go to the land of Wiltshire,” Luna said firmly, and Rolf and Victoire looked at her in surprise. 

 

“Wiltshire?”

 

“That is where the Prince of Snow lives,” Luna told them.

 

“The Prince of Snow has taken Teddy?” Victoire exclaimed. “But why?”

 

“The family resemblance, I suspect.”

 

Victoire did not know what to make of that, and turned to look at Rolf to see if he had understood what Luna meant, but he only shrugged, just as equally in the dark as she was.

 

“It is decided, then,” Luna nodded. “You will stay here tonight, and in the morning we shall send you off to Wiltshire.”

 (I AM A LITTLE DISAPPOINTED - IN MY AUS LUNA DIVORCES ROLF, AND NEVILLE DIVORCES HANNAH, AND LUNA AND NEVILLE REMARRY)

Fifth story, the robber girl

 

The next morning, Luna and Rolf gave Victoire a broom, a knapsack full of provisions, and some warm clothes, because she had started her journey in fine weather, but now it was beginning to be chilly.

 Seventh story, what happened in the Manor of Ice, and afterwards

 Victoire had hoped to see Luna upon her return, but she and Rolf had gone abroad together, to look for the Crumple-Horned Snorkack.