MISS DERMARK'S STYLE GUIDE

THE FOLLOWING IS NOT INTENDED TO BE MEANT AS A CRITIQUE OR SATIRE OF POLITICAL CORRECTNESS.

RATHER, IT IS INTENDED AS AN HONEST, NON-OFFENSIVE STYLE GUIDE I USE FOR MY OWN WRITINGS AND ENCOURAGE YOU READERS TO OBSERVE AS WELL.

THIS GUIDE CONCERNS THE PRONUNCIATION OF CERTAIN WORDS AS WELL AS THE STRATEGIES THAT SHOULD BE USED TO AVOID THE DISCRIMINATORY USES OF STANDARD ENGLISH MOST COMMON IN AN EVERYDAY CONTEXT.

ONLY TWO SIMPLE RULES ARE OBSERVED IN THIS GUIDE:

• TO CALL A SPADE A SPADE.

  

  This is a spade.
  

  
  

• NEVER TO BE OFFENSIVE IN ANY WAY.

PRONUNCIATION
Certain words with double pronunciation should be pronounced in the least offensive way possible, for instance:

• "Lieutenant" should always be pronounced /lefténant/.
• "Uranus" should always be pronounced /ooráhnus/.

AGAINST RACISM

• Avoid at every cost the use of the ethnic terms "black", "nigger", "white", "red", "Injun" (and variations thereof), "yellow", and "chink" (and variations thereof), et cetera. And the word "race" itself in terms of human descent.
• The appropriate term should be "ethnic descent" or "ethnic group". To name ethnic groups in particular, use "Sub-Saharan", "Caucasian", "East Asian", "Native American" or "First Nations", "Middle Eastern"... "Sun person" in general, for dark-skinned ethnic groups, is also acceptable.

AGAINST SEXISM

• Say "humankind" to count in both or all of the genders/sexes.
• Avoid at every cost the use of profession names ending with the suffix "-man" (or "-woman" if it also exists). Say "firefighter", "police officer", "lollipop person/officer", "military person/officer", "noble", "Chairperson" or plain "Chair"...
• Do not perpetuate or promote traditional gender roles.
• Make use of the newfangled generic pronoun "s/he" (pronounced "sh-he"), of the genderless number-pronoun "one", and of the plural "them/they": "All good things come to those who wait".

AGAINST SPECIESISM

• Avoid at every cost the use of the word "animals" to refer solely to mammals and/or reptiles, lowing out aquatic and aeroterrestrial fauna. This use is both ambiguous and discriminatory.
• Avoid at every cost the use of the word "plants" to refer solely to herbaceous flora, lowing out shrubs, trees, ferns, and mosses. This use is both ambiguous and discriminatory.

AGAINST HETEROSEXISM

• Do not perpetuate or promote prejudice against free love and/or alternate lifestyles.
• Avoid at every cost the discrimination of LGBTQ people and offensive insults like "fag", "dyke", or "wanker". Queer people have the right not to be offended.

AGAINST ABLEISM

• Avoid at every cost the use of old-fashioned terms for impairments. Use the terms containing the word "challenged" more common nowadays: "cerebrally/emotionally/socially/physically/visually/aurally/speech challenged".
• "Differently abled" is also a term that should be used in these cases.
• For certain kinds of physique, there are also equivalent "challenged" and "gifted" terms: "vertically challenged/gifted", and "horizontally challenged/gifted". 
• The addiction to certain chemicals shall be always referred to as "substance abuse" or "chemically challenged".

OTHER

• Our opposable thumbs are also fingers.
• The Sun is actually a star.
• The Earth's Moon is actually a natural satellite, or moon with a lower-case "m".

IF YOU WISH TO EXPRESS YOURSELF IN A WAY THAT CONTRADICTS THE EXAMPLES ABOVE, SHUT. UP.